Living The Simple Life

[llama112]

Wow llama thanks for your response. First off I have to say I am so glad I came across bluelight. This place is awesome!

Growing up in the country wow. Did you milk cows growing up lol?

You make some great points. It might be good to try some happy mediums before making an extreme move to live on a farm in the middle of nowhere. Maybe a less hectic city, or the suburbs, or a job that I can personally identify with. And maybe put less pressure on myself to find the perfect significant other. Just take what life throws with gratitude.

Lol I didn't milk cows. I worked on a ginseng farm for a few years and a tobacco farm for a year. My sister milked cows though.

Also, keep in mind that country living can be expensive. The money that I spent on gas ... ah! And everything was just so much more expensive there. I dunno, it wasn't simple. It sucked. At least for me. There just ... wasn't much to do.

If you do want to have a farm and stuff - keep in mind it is a LOT of work and for very little. Many people cannot survive off of what they have on their farms. They have to work a normal job too.

 

[BlueHues]

I'm the king of "geographical cures"....You may be bored to tears if you leave the city, maybe just find a smaller city that still has a lot to offer that's close to a more bucolic, natural setting.....

I moved to the big island of Hawaii in hopes of living a simple, natural life.....Within six months I started to go stir-crazy. It was much too laid back for me....

 

[tu_madre]

Hm. I honestly used to believe the "simple life" mentality was all in your head. BUT...

I'm moving at the end of the month, so half of my "stuff" is already boxed up or stored. I've found that THIS sort of simple life, with few physical possessions except needed ones, is FAR LESS STRESSFUL than the "keeping up with the Joneses' STUFF" mentality I find other people my age ascribing too. Some of them are so obsessed with comparing themselves to others that they are wretchedly unhappy (but would very quickly DENY all of the above).

As far as location goes, meh... There's some merit to the term, "wherever you go, there you are," but if you desire to live around other people who have the same mindset as you (for me, this means greater commitment to community, volunteerism, local business support, green living, etc), I see nothing wrong with moving to a different place for the sake of your mental health. I'm perfectly happy where I am now, but know I will be happier(and less lonely) once I am living amongst other people "more like me."

DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT move somewhere you have never visited yet!

I honestly don't believe in living in the country OR suburbs because A)they are generally terrifically boring and usually devoid of diversity, and B)the environmental/ecological unsustainability of the necessary dependence on automobiles as transport for even the simplest of tasks.

Read "The Geography of Nowhere: The Rise and Decline of America's Man-Made Landscape" for more in-depth analysis of the cons surrounding leading a typical suburban lifestyle.

 

[beagleboy]

beagle boy, Hows the beautiful weather in FLA?

Its Sunny and the college/tourist/family/cinco de myo rush just ended. Preparing for june/july/august and some of sep. to have 80%+ Humidity. Come down to central florida. Miami is a tourist trap for the new age Yuppies, and the locals if they are even employable, are suspicious of white people.

 

[Foreigner]

OP, I can relate to where you're at. I'm having trouble connecting with people in the city I'm in. Lack of community has become the lynch pin of my downfall in life. I've analyzed it to death, but after talking with so many other people who feel as I do, it's obviously the city that's the problem. Totally flaky, vain, vapid, and anti-social at the same time. Obsessed with beauty but not with substance. Typical west coast.

I've done a lot of self-actualizing in the past couple of years and I'm a bit concerned that the desire to relocate may be a false lure. I believe we have everything we need within us to change for the better, so wherever we are is where the work is happening. I'm trying really hard to make this place work but I have been facing a lot of pragmatic opposition.

I would like to move somewhere smaller because I perceive that it will have more freedom, and I can engage in things like horticulture, as well as commune with nature more than in the city. I also have this vague, undeniable feeling that major economic shit is going to go down in the not too distant future and the last place I want to be if that happens is somewhere urban. But small town living?... I don't know. It might be a pipe dream. Though I figure, if I know I don't fit in anywhere, then it doesn't quite matter where I am, right?

 

[Pretty_Diamonds]

I live on an island. Mainland people always say, "it's too slow". I dunno. I love it!

 

[thujone]

Man owning a rural property and all the work to maintain it is nuts. Hardly the utopian lifestyle one might picture. Even a little house just outside of some big city where you've got 4 acres of land is a huge time investment to look after. Stress is based on how you structure your life. The idea that city life = stressful and rural life = chilled out is such a myth.

Agreed. I live in the city and the pace of life is faster, in the sense that you count time by the digits instead of by the sun's position in the sky or the changing of seasons. I've taken toward a more zen lifestyle as of late and it's diminished my stress levels by a major amount.

Stress is often rooted in a feeling that you lack control in your life, so "getting away from it all" and moving out into the country where you have acres of land in your domain is a typical reaction manifested by the desire to regain control. A more sensible reaction would be to start retaking control of your existing life little-by-little, and establishing solid routines goes a long way toward that.

Some basic routines I've incorporated into my life lately are simple things like going to bed and waking up at the same time every day, or doing laundry at the same time each week, or preparing meals for the week during the weekend. I find a healthy diet goes far toward busting stress and by preparing healthy meals for the week on the weekend I never have to worry about eating healthy during the week when my schedule gets hectic. It's easy to just grab a lunch from the freezer then pop it in a microwave when it's time to eat.

Once a good routine is established for your weekly life, you can look at ways to streamline the rest of your life. Sometimes luxuries that you think would make life easier actually compound your stress. Take a cell phone for example. A lot of people use smartphones now, which might provide some entertainment when you've got time to kill but it's not productive. Having a smartphone also means the temptation of reading every email as soon as you get them, despite the fact that the contents of those emails can often cause stress by forcing you to think about how to respond or react to the situation presented.

Another good example is owning a car. While it might be convenient to be able to just go anywhere anytime, it also means spending more money on your transportation and having to worry about maintenance, the cost of gas and insurance premiums. Not only that, but having the ability to just hop in your car and go anywhere leaves you a victim to your impulses. I can't even remember how many times I'd nip out to the drive-thru or liquor store just on an impulse because it took only 10 minutes by car.

Anyway, I'm sure you get the point I'm trying to make. Take control where you can in your life. Establish strict routines to keep yourself from getting overextended, streamline your expenditures to cut out crap you don't really need, take more vacations with the money you save and fuck the shit you had no chance of controlling in the first place

 

[Maya]

Live in the big city it is fast paced but I still find time to relax etc.. It's just more convenient to be in civilization but maybe when i retire i would def move closer to nature

 

[pastelcircus]

There are perks and downfalls to each, I've lived in both and always find myself desiring the opposite of what I have. That being said, I have made the adjustment of both moving to the city from the country and moving to the country from the city. Culture shock is a bitch both coming and leaving a city, let me tell you.

if you're moving from NYC to a smaller, more idyllic location, keep these things in mind- depending on what city/ town/ village you chose to move to, things are going to be very different. Things such as 24/7 food are not going to be available, your favorite little quirky coffee shop is going to be replaced by either a starbucks or regional chain, and your relatively short commute on possibly public transportation route or bike is going to be replaced by a somewhat lengthy drive in a car that costs money to insure and maintain. Sure, you said that a country life would mean no more fancy cars, but get used to the idea of putting high mileage and actual wear and tear on a vehicle that has considerably less eye appeal. Don't get me wrong, country living is great- if you aren't the type of person that gets along well enough in a city to be bored enough in the country where the only culture and entertainment available is either local or self-induced.

now- country living has it's way of being beautiful as well. Instead of standing with strangers as a bus stop and standing shoulder to shoulder with people that you may or may not ever exchange more than a word with, you get to start your car and listen to whatever you want with the windows down and the breeze in your hair on your way to work or play. You get to consolidate all of those important things on your to-do list into things to be done in and out of town, and you eventually learn to manage your time a little more wisely since the things that you want aren't available at all hours of the day. You get to notice the native plants and birds come and go with the seasons, other than the ones that were planted in boxes by the city in order to maintain a nice attractive aura to city dwellers and tourists alike.

whether or not you move to the country is really none of my business, I just recommend that you make sure that you're nor simply trading one life's hassles for another when what you really wanted was some peace of mind. Sometimes people move hoping for a life change only to realize that their life doesn't change unless they do.

remember- anxiety can be caused by boredom along with busy social schedules and dating, I'd say that the best way for you to enjoy life and minimize stress would be to practice more mindfulness and cut back on the meds, maybe find other ways to reduce your anxiety instead of planning an executing a stressful move and life change.

that yoga studio that has both early bird and late night classes won't be open quite as late once you move away from a city that was built to never sleep, and that 360 days a year health food store has no chance of surviving when the people around you are quite okay with eating whatever the local grocer happens to have put on special that week.

 

[kaywholed]

balance