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Shambles

Shambles

Moderator: EADD; MD; Words
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Oct 16, 2006
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A Pottering Shed Somewhere in the Scotchland
So @MedicinalUser247 started a thread about a flying bed - this was a brilliant idea for a thread… and I’m basically stealing the idea for a distinctly similar thread with a few tweaks to the formula. Just felt it needed to be said that this is basically straight-up theft from @MedicinalUser247 so respect has to be paid 💜

This variant will differ in that we will be working towards a more focused outcome. Complete non-sequiturs, obvious derailments and utter bullshittery will be pruned. Yes, yes my mighty stick will be wielded where appropriate.

Ideally we’re looking for a paragraph or two that follows directly on from the previous post. You can take the narrative in any direction you please - as quotidian, prosaic or surrealist as you wish - but must follow directly on and build upon the prior post.

Nonsense, resets and retcons will feel the wrath of my mighty stick!!! Quality posts that please the Words community will no doubt receive lashings of love eyes and thumbs ups and so forth.

I feel this thread will crash and burn rapidly… but my faith in us all is strong - good luck and Godspeed!!!
 
He awoke from a strange dream. His bed had flown him through worlds unknown. A strange dream indeed. But now reality hit him hard.

He yawned, rolled over and sat perched upon the edge of the bed. Yawning again he reflexively scratched his balls whilst inhaling deeply the freshly wafted breezy morning farts he pooted into the mattress beneath.

He dreaded what was to come. This day had loomed large in his mind. For today was the day he…
 
sniffed his fingers and yet another fart bellowed from his tight little asshole tense from the day ahead with a foreboding apprehensive dread ,he cracked his neck and knuckles.This day was one of the days that proved
 
Shambles said:
So @MedicinalUser247 started a thread about a flying bed - this was a brilliant idea for a thread… and I’m basically stealing the idea for a distinctly similar thread with a few tweaks to the formula. Just felt it needed to be said that this is basically straight-up theft from @MedicinalUser247 so respect has to be paid 💜

This variant will differ in that we will be working towards a more focused outcome. Complete non-sequiturs, obvious derailments and utter bullshittery will be pruned. Yes, yes my mighty stick will be wielded where appropriate.

Ideally we’re looking for a paragraph or two that follows directly on from the previous post. You can take the narrative in any direction you please - as quotidian, prosaic or surrealist as you wish - but must follow directly on and build upon the prior post.

Nonsense, resets and retcons will feel the wrath of my mighty stick!!! Quality posts that please the Words community will no doubt receive lashings of love eyes and thumbs ups and so forth.

I feel this thread will crash and burn rapidly… but my faith in us all is strong - good luck and Godspeed!!!
Click to expand...
Penguin No GIF by Pudgy Penguins
 
After that the Bed began to fly high above the sky, and then it swooped down under a bridge and then over a mountain and then swooped down into a psychedelic garden lit with so much detail one's my could only be blown away. After that the Bed along with it's occupant...
 
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began to settle in a cloud that was more like glitter,than sand.The man realized he was still dreaming.He sat up scratching ,farting and sniffing.The dread consumed him,he didn't want to...
 
...Urinate on the sheets as the bed was new but all the excitement had made him aware of his incontinence, to much wine the night before maybe ,why the strange dream had he eaten cheese before bedtime ,no he was sure he hadn't was he in a state of hypnagogia between 2 worlds " I must attempt to leave this cursed bed" the man thought ,so with great courage he ....
 
… deal with these incessant farts. Today had loomed large in his mind for today was the day of his first ever colonoscopy.

Drudgiingly he dressed his lazy arse - parping a few voluminous poots as he did so - and began to trudge towards the proctologist’s office.

Once inside he lay on his side, tried to relax whereupon The Fear hit him hard as he saw…
 
...the oncoming wrath of Shambles. He knew the man would expect prose of a literary quality and a post about a delicious feast he'd consumed. He feared not the wrath of the moderators, only that he deliver devilishly delightful Bluelight content. He knew MedicinalUser247 would be providing some excellent music for stoners, and maybe some of them would be great serenades for banging. He remembered the lovingly libidinous nubile asian woman he'd made love to so many years ago. All the nerve endings, the various awe-inspiring love neurochemicals, and then finally the petit morte! The tombstone of the grave they'd made love atop of had read, "James Douglas Morrison". Amazingly none of the cherry syrup they'd doused themselves in had drenched the grave. But now he feared what he'd drenched with his asshole.

He checked his poopy asshole again, searching for blood...
 
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