Mental Health jealousy

G.C.A

Greenlighter
Joined
Sep 27, 2015
Messages
3
hello
I am writing this message to know how to deal with jealousy, is there any solutions or any tips to deal with it into a relationship?
 
What are the circumstances?

In general jealously/envy can be overcome by realizing that just about everyone has some struggles in their life, hardships and such...the emotion of jealously/envy starts out with the notion of "this person has it good, while I have it bad" (or at least "not as good")...but life is a bitch to everyone ;) You may not grasp someone's "issues" because they don't broadcast them to other people but trust me, everyone has got them. That's always been my perspective, anyway.
 
What are the circumstances?

In general jealously/envy can be overcome by realizing that just about everyone has some struggles in their life, hardships and such...the emotion of jealously/envy starts out with the notion of "this person has it good, while I have it bad" (or at least "not as good")...but life is a bitch to everyone ;) You may not grasp someone's "issues" because they don't broadcast them to other people but trust me, everyone has got them. That's always been my perspective, anyway.

There is no specific circumstances it was just a general question and thank you for your answer
 
Are you the jealous one or is your partner jealous?

If it's you, then it's something you can absolutely overcome and fix. I found that jealousy frequently coexists with personal insecurity. I have had bouts of jealousy and it conincided when I was feeling really low about myself. I had to work through my issues to overcome the jealousy, but I did and it's been several years since I've had those types of feelings.

If your partner is jealous and you've never given them reason to be (infidelity, lying, etc), then it's a red flag and cause for closer examination. Do they have anger issues, are the secretive, any other issues? If you're having to deal with this it indicates that your partner has some unresolved issues, and you have to figure out what those issues truly are (not necessarily what they say they are) and figure out if you want to continue in a relationship with them. The worst relationship of my life was with a jealous guy who ended up being a serial cheater and very abusive. It was one of the first relationships I had as an adult, and as a result I never stayed in a relationship with someone with jealousy issues after that initial experience.

If you can provide more details we can provide better answers.
 
In my opinion, envy is a normal human emotion. We see something that another has, and we want it for ourselves. It can be a good reason to get out there and achieve what we think will make us happier.

Jealousy is under my understanding an envy that has become personal, and is coated in anger and sorrow.

In a relationship, as in between friends, it might work to just open up and tell them that you're jealous, and tell them what you're jealous about. It doesn't always work, but in my experience a friendship that doesn't include talking honestly about feelings that we're not always proud of, is a friendship that should be worked on at least, and at worst it may not be a worthwhile friendship.

I've definitely been jealous of others before. I still am, but I also tend to believe that, as another poster suggested, we all have parts about us that we don't like or that we want to improve on, parts that aren't evident to most of those around us. We're all humans, and we all have to pick and choose actions and words based on calculations that our choices will help us out more than hurt us, but we're imperfect. A lot of life is a guessing game. One of the only sure things is that the overwhelming majority of people find life hard at times, and occasionally look at someone else and think "Wow, I'd really like what they have."

Just coming clean and telling someone you trust whom knows more about your situation overall and whom you think might provide a different perspective, would probably help.

I know that in my experience, jealousy can be a horribly painful, very upsetting thing to deal with. So at least you're not alone there.
 
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