Recovery I've been numb for so long...

[nznity]

Today I'm 16 days clean of an ongoing IV morphine addiction, this is the longest i've been clean since MAY 2018. I'm crying right now, I can feel emotions again. I'm just starting to realize all the fucked up shit i've been doing for the past 8 years, one good thing the fucking corona virus brought.If it wasn't for the quarantine i'd still be banging that fucking poison. I can't fuck up anymore, i've sold all my posessions for one more shot, I've literally don't have any material posessions but i got something that is more important i think, HOPE. Let's see how this works out in the end...

 

[mtu mwendawazimu]

Today I'm 16 days clean ...

That's awesome, man. Happiness without drugs is hard.. but a lot more sustainable.

I'm just starting to realize all the fucked up shit i've been doing for the past 8 years..

Good - play the tape. Remember what no good it does.

Emotions are healthy to have. I would be blessed to cry, as weird as it sounds, because holding it in is only bad news IME.

.. but i got something that is more important i think ...

I don't doubt it, but curious what it is?

 

[SunriseChampion]

Good on ya. I know it must be hard....in fact, I can't imagine as I've never dealt with anything that had bad long term withdrawal symptoms.

Keep it going. When I quit meth way back whenever the fuck that was last decade, I had to very conciously go back to the things I remember having enjoyed before to fill the sort of "gap" that came to be. Not sure if that sort of thinking is helpful to you at all.

 

[nznity]

That's awesome, man. Happiness without drugs is hard.. but a lot more sustainable.



Good - play the tape. Remember what no good it does.

Emotions are healthy to have. I would be blessed to cry, as weird as it sounds, because holding it in is only bad news IME.



I don't doubt it, but curious what it is?

That's awesome, man. Happiness without drugs is hard.. but a lot more sustainable.



Good - play the tape. Remember what no good it does.

Emotions are healthy to have. I would be blessed to cry, as weird as it sounds, because holding it in is only bad news IME.



I don't doubt it, but curious what it is?

Hope.

 

[Jabberwocky]

fuck i can remember first getting clean and feeling emotions again. so many tears and not even understanding why i was crying.

i'm relaly glad the lockdown has done you some good man, are you able to do some online meetings or remote therapy while you're at home? if you put in some psychological work now, it will make it easier for you not to go back to your own ways when the lockdown ends.