it happens so quickly..

[tocooperate]

i spent some time going backwards through photo albums, picking out the times that i was geeked out. at some point, the only way to tell was whether i was a chubby mess or skeletor. but shit, it really wasn't too long ago that i was enjoying my life in these pictures without having to drop pills, maybe 2 years? or maybe that IS a long time ago, i dont know anymore. but why does it feel like an infinite chasm of time, i feel like if i didnt have the responsibilities of a real working professional i'd be able to clean myself up but unfortunately i don't have that luxury currently.

sorry just needed to get that out, thanks for reading

 

[badfish45]

Not a problem. I often miss the past as well, and I think that you should use it as a motivational tool. You have the ability to overcome this and be able to enjoy life without drugs once again. It might seem like you're too busy but since you should take quitting as a slow process. Don't feel like anything is holding you back at the moment except the addiction itself.

 

[herbavore]

i feel like if i didnt have the responsibilities of a real working professional i'd be able to clean myself up but unfortunately i don't have that luxury currently.

Do you mean that you can't take time off work to go to a detox/rehab or that you simply can't suffer through the withdrawal symptoms and maintain your level of work?

 

[Miss Kirsty]

Times goes faster the older you get, i think...At least thats what has happened to me...I remember when i had my baby and everyone said " make sure you enjoy the wee years"....I didnt know what those people ment untill the years were gone .They went soo fast..I think that was the start of my life just flying by, when i became a parent...
Photo albums can be sad or happy to view...I dont like looking back at the pictures where i looked like death...Weighing 40 kgs, sooo sick...But my mum wont get rid of them....Even though i was sick and dead practically, my mum stills hold them pics near....



You must make TIME to FIX yourself, because if you are sick mate, you will lose your job eventually..Step up....really..this is a top priority....Try to get off the cycle you are on...You sound ready.......

 

[Vaya]

When it comes to fixing yourself up, a little effort now goes a loooong way down the road. I am a text-book procrastinator, but not when it comes to life events. I have been taught through painful trial-and-error repetition that those things I choose not to address now for reason X, Y and/or Z will crop up and devastate my future happiness. That cycle is just something that I cannot endure any longer. I adopted the Nike slogan "Just Do It" and have applied to to so many things - from mundane things like doing laundry and washing dishes and getting a haircut to applying for work, getting sober, getting honest with myself and others, and other, larger life events.

Those three simple words.. I don't know what it is about them, but saying them to myself casts an unappealing pall over the alternatives to action, and in the end I am always happy that I was able to force my way through the indecision.

~ vaya