Vastness
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Mar 10, 2006
- Messages
- 2,306
I am sure most people familiar with Ketamine will understand the feeling of being close to unlocking some kind of divine secret. However I am curious, has anyone actually gained anything from a Ketamine trip that they have been able to integrate into, and thus, hopefully improve their experience of, day to day life?
I am aware of Ketamine's therapeutic potential, however for the purposes of this discussion, I am not referring to threshold dosing, but heavier dosing, either in the context of a prolonged session resulting in palpably altered perception and intoxication, or a shorter but intense session with the intention of inducing a K-hole.
Ketamine is a fascinating drug to me, and I have had many good times on it. Just remembering some of my past experiences K-holing from several years ago now can still make me feel a little choked with emotion, such was the intensity of feeling induced... however I recently ended up acquiring some K again, and on this occasion although there are several differences in my life and also the set and setting than from my previous experiences, I found that I seem to have become already jaded to this seemingly false and forever unfulfilled feeling of impending enlightenment. There is a definite sweet spot during the experience (for me, anyway) where you are not quite wholly "somewhere else" but are definitely on the way, and it is during this period that I can typically begin to build up expectations in my mind of the actualisation of this feeling of enlightenment which is surely coming, but then, following the actual trip itself, the immediate aftermath is always a wired and confusing mess of residual psychedelia, intoxication and creeping disappointment that I don't seem to have brought anything of value back from the experience - the disappointment is, I guess, much like the feeling of waking up from a dream as a child and being disappointed that whatever I was trying to bring with me into waking reality has evaporated.
I could probably point at many things in my own life that would be the cause of this, several years ago I was indulging out of pure hedonism, with far less responsibilities or concerns than today, and obvously as a general rule it is probably bad practice to really expect to get anything out of almost any substance except a fleeting fun experience, and if anything else does come out of it, that is a bonus. But that said, compared to other psychedelics and as one of the only truly addictive psychedelics Ketamine does strike me as a drug with a particularly, and strangely, seductive dark side and comparatively few actual measurable benefits (again, just to reiterate, I am referring to usage with the intention of inducing a powerful psychedelic experience, not controlled therapeutic dosing). The trip itself, although often fantastical, seems to be largely without any interpretable meaning, but despite this the come-up always seems to come with the promise of a deep and important meaning just around the corner. It also does seem to be the case that prolonged and heavy Ketamine use does eventually induce full blown delusions and possibly subconscious suicidal tendencies, at least if the few prominent and heavy Ketamine users are a representative sample.
In light of the above observations (assuming that you agree with them, at least in part, please do say if you do not!) I was just curious if ketamine has actually improved anyone's life in any measurable way, or if users mostly either get sick of trying to discern it's cryptic or possibly nonexistent message and give up on it, or end up going down the road of addiction and and habituation, following the rabbit deeper and deeper into the mirage.
I am aware of Ketamine's therapeutic potential, however for the purposes of this discussion, I am not referring to threshold dosing, but heavier dosing, either in the context of a prolonged session resulting in palpably altered perception and intoxication, or a shorter but intense session with the intention of inducing a K-hole.
Ketamine is a fascinating drug to me, and I have had many good times on it. Just remembering some of my past experiences K-holing from several years ago now can still make me feel a little choked with emotion, such was the intensity of feeling induced... however I recently ended up acquiring some K again, and on this occasion although there are several differences in my life and also the set and setting than from my previous experiences, I found that I seem to have become already jaded to this seemingly false and forever unfulfilled feeling of impending enlightenment. There is a definite sweet spot during the experience (for me, anyway) where you are not quite wholly "somewhere else" but are definitely on the way, and it is during this period that I can typically begin to build up expectations in my mind of the actualisation of this feeling of enlightenment which is surely coming, but then, following the actual trip itself, the immediate aftermath is always a wired and confusing mess of residual psychedelia, intoxication and creeping disappointment that I don't seem to have brought anything of value back from the experience - the disappointment is, I guess, much like the feeling of waking up from a dream as a child and being disappointed that whatever I was trying to bring with me into waking reality has evaporated.
I could probably point at many things in my own life that would be the cause of this, several years ago I was indulging out of pure hedonism, with far less responsibilities or concerns than today, and obvously as a general rule it is probably bad practice to really expect to get anything out of almost any substance except a fleeting fun experience, and if anything else does come out of it, that is a bonus. But that said, compared to other psychedelics and as one of the only truly addictive psychedelics Ketamine does strike me as a drug with a particularly, and strangely, seductive dark side and comparatively few actual measurable benefits (again, just to reiterate, I am referring to usage with the intention of inducing a powerful psychedelic experience, not controlled therapeutic dosing). The trip itself, although often fantastical, seems to be largely without any interpretable meaning, but despite this the come-up always seems to come with the promise of a deep and important meaning just around the corner. It also does seem to be the case that prolonged and heavy Ketamine use does eventually induce full blown delusions and possibly subconscious suicidal tendencies, at least if the few prominent and heavy Ketamine users are a representative sample.
In light of the above observations (assuming that you agree with them, at least in part, please do say if you do not!) I was just curious if ketamine has actually improved anyone's life in any measurable way, or if users mostly either get sick of trying to discern it's cryptic or possibly nonexistent message and give up on it, or end up going down the road of addiction and and habituation, following the rabbit deeper and deeper into the mirage.
) and while I can feel this while under the influence, I have not really succeeded in bringing it back with me.
