Is the anything more to life?

[METHAMPHEDAMAN]

Recently in the months that have passed I have really struggled with meth addiction. The problem is I never want to be sober from drugs anymore. I have tried to quit multiple times but the desire for snorting meth had caught such a grip on me. When I'm high I feel confident and energetic, I feel like I can do anything I want, I don't feel as socially awkward or anything. When I'm not high i feel "numb" and I feel confused, I have no desire to get out of bed in the morning, I have no desire to talk to my parent (not like our relationship is anything special), and I feel like nobody cares about me. I fight the urge to get high pretty much everyday, I just feel like there is no point to life anymore. When I think of me quitting I remember that rush I get and I think about I'll never be able to stop. I also have problems with how judgemental everyone is that hasn't had any experience, everyone makes me feel like a freak because I do meth, which makes me want the rush even more. I need to find something other than meth to make me happy, but I honestly don't see it in my future

 

[Ozekat]

There is always a side of life that exists apart from drugs.


I'm struggling a lot with opiates and I can relate to you. I am going through tons of emotional crap right now, getting off opiates. You say your relationship isn't special with your parent? Why is that?

I've been working on my relationship with my mom and dad.....my mom always knows when I am using and I don't talk to her much when I am so she is just always in tune....moms are great I've been clean for 2 weeks now and am starting to talk to her more.

And me and my dad have been getting along great since we had a long fire-side chat the other night

Parents are good things to me..... but they can be really annoying lol

 

[spork]

I'm sorry to hear that you've been struggling. Addiction is indeed a slippery slope and it can be difficult to get back on your own two feet again. What did you enjoy doing before you started using? You might want to look back into that or going way back into your childhood and picking up hobbies that you enjoyed back then (even if they might seem silly now). I liked sewing a lot as a child and pretty much let it go, but I've been getting back into it lately and it makes me feel happy to be doing something so simple that I loved so much before.

You might want to consider not having anymore contact with your dealers and other people that you do meth with. It's easier to quit when you don't have those temptations in your life anymore. There is life after meth. It's different, but the hard work of getting clean and staying clean is totally worth it.

 

[Anthrogirl]

What you're experiencing sounds like anhedonia and its very common after quitting drugs. Here is a link about it:
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anhedonia

I only have experience with anhedonia from quitting opiates but I did see a psychiatrist because it was just too much for me too handle on my own. Modafanil helped me a lot and so did an antidepressant. Having someone knowledgeable to talk to about these issues helped also. Hopefully you won't need medication but don't feel bad if you do hon.

Exercise also really helps! So does any activity that stimulates your emotions. For example, watch a movie that makes you laugh or cry. This will help bring back those emotions you've been covering up. Or reading an intense book, making love, listening to amazing music, seeing great art, gaze through a telescope and be awestruck, meditate, hang with positive people etc, etc.

Also, have you tried any type of recovery meetings? Even if its to keep you busy for your first several months clean? They can also be useful for meeting new friends who don't use.

 

[RobotRipping]

stimulant addiction is tough, are you happy snorting meth every day? i'm guessing not because you made this post. So if you want to be happier then quitting meth is your best bet. Yeah life seems pretty dull in comparison, i can barely wake up or function without dexedrine and it's nearly impossible to quit when you have a script for it. However you won't face a horrible withdrawal if you quit, anhedonia, boredom, fatigue, increased apetite are the kinds of things you'll experience but those effects will fade pretty quickly. The hard part with stims is to get the first few days over with and deal with the boredom. Perhaps taking a vacation to a place where you cannot get any meth would help, just make sure not to fall back into your old habits upon return.

there are other ways to make life exciting, like following your passions, hobbies, dreams, trying new experiences, experiencing a different culture. Perhaps moving somewhere else would help if that's possible.

of course exercise and eating healthy would help but for the first few days, you're probably going to have to accept that you're not going to want to do anything and just grin and bear it, knowing that things will improve. You've got nothing to lose by quitting.

I find stimulant addiction to be a much different beast than opiate addiction. The only way to really quit is to cut off your sources. If you're taking meds for ADD anyway, you don't really need meth, just stick to your prescription and don't abuse it (pretty sure you mention you had scripted meds in another post).