Flickering
Bluelighter
Had this on my mind as I woke up today. It seems like for everyone I know well enough, I can name at least one major compulsive, irrational, destructive behaviour they just cannot shake. Including myself. Is it just a universal constant for humans? Do we all have our own kind of pain and our own twisted ways of dealing with it?
There's an adage that goes, "The only normal people are the ones you don't know well enough." But that's the nice way to put it. I'm more fond of the one I've heard thrown around by a surprising number of people from various corners of life: "Everyone is fucked up."
My dad once told me something that stuck with me. "Everyone has a vice. It could be gambling, drugs, food, rape, work, exercise - whatever it is, everyone has something they just can't shake." The older I get, the more I notice that's true. One friend had to have drugs - it wasn't so important which drugs, and so once he kicked crack it was alcohol, and once he kicked alcohol it was opiates, and in the end those killed him. Another friend eats nothing but chocolate even though he's hyper-obese. Another drinks several litres of coke a day. I've met people who are hooked on the weirdest stuff, fetishes and/or bizarre identity association. And as I study abnormal psychology, I read about so many truly weird, almost psychotic behaviours in otherwise healthy, well-adjusted people.
Some say that some people have an 'addictive personality' and others don't so much. I've always had my reservations about that.
For my part, as a kid I was hooked on videogames from the time I was allowed to play them. I was one of those people who would lock up in my room for entire days if I had the chance. (Worth noting, I had a mostly good childhood save for a few obligatory traumatic events / phases, and at nine, I decided to limit my use of the computer to weekends - and I stuck with it for years.) Going into adolescence, it shifted into an addiction to masturbation, then sex at fifteen. Which is funny. Most people see that as one of the shallowest addictions possible, but I've never once had someone describe me as shallow. The exact same goes for another good friend.
The curious thing is that everything else has come and gone. Right now I'm kicking an addiction to alcohol. It isn't that hard. I simply recognised that I've been drinking heavily every other day, and that if I keep it up I'll end up with all sorts of physical and mental problems. So I've stopped. I relapsed once, during a severe depressive episode. Even then, I would've been fine if I'd had some weed instead. I'm also hooked on sugar, like 99% of people in this society, but I'm having little trouble at least cutting back on it. I procrastinate a lot, but I can usually stop if I put my mind to it. But sexuality, I haven't been able to shake since I hit puberty. So I guess that's my vice.
What do you think, is addiction simply part of being human? How has it manifested for you, or hasn't it?
There's an adage that goes, "The only normal people are the ones you don't know well enough." But that's the nice way to put it. I'm more fond of the one I've heard thrown around by a surprising number of people from various corners of life: "Everyone is fucked up."
My dad once told me something that stuck with me. "Everyone has a vice. It could be gambling, drugs, food, rape, work, exercise - whatever it is, everyone has something they just can't shake." The older I get, the more I notice that's true. One friend had to have drugs - it wasn't so important which drugs, and so once he kicked crack it was alcohol, and once he kicked alcohol it was opiates, and in the end those killed him. Another friend eats nothing but chocolate even though he's hyper-obese. Another drinks several litres of coke a day. I've met people who are hooked on the weirdest stuff, fetishes and/or bizarre identity association. And as I study abnormal psychology, I read about so many truly weird, almost psychotic behaviours in otherwise healthy, well-adjusted people.
Some say that some people have an 'addictive personality' and others don't so much. I've always had my reservations about that.
For my part, as a kid I was hooked on videogames from the time I was allowed to play them. I was one of those people who would lock up in my room for entire days if I had the chance. (Worth noting, I had a mostly good childhood save for a few obligatory traumatic events / phases, and at nine, I decided to limit my use of the computer to weekends - and I stuck with it for years.) Going into adolescence, it shifted into an addiction to masturbation, then sex at fifteen. Which is funny. Most people see that as one of the shallowest addictions possible, but I've never once had someone describe me as shallow. The exact same goes for another good friend.
The curious thing is that everything else has come and gone. Right now I'm kicking an addiction to alcohol. It isn't that hard. I simply recognised that I've been drinking heavily every other day, and that if I keep it up I'll end up with all sorts of physical and mental problems. So I've stopped. I relapsed once, during a severe depressive episode. Even then, I would've been fine if I'd had some weed instead. I'm also hooked on sugar, like 99% of people in this society, but I'm having little trouble at least cutting back on it. I procrastinate a lot, but I can usually stop if I put my mind to it. But sexuality, I haven't been able to shake since I hit puberty. So I guess that's my vice.
What do you think, is addiction simply part of being human? How has it manifested for you, or hasn't it?
) are merely maladaptive behavior patterns … some involve substances…. 
