Interracial porn over years causing gay thoughts on straight man!!!

[Fitg52]

Hello I'm new to this forum site, just wondered if anyone else has had this or going thru ect or just want opinions??

I'm a 36 yo white man I'm married to a very hot wife and we have great sex life I'm good looking very muscular and masculine ... About 12 years ago I started watching interracial porn (black man with hott white/Latin or Asian girls) and it turned me on so I started watching more and more to where it was all I watched. After about a year it had become a obsession , the only kind that gets me hard or I masturebate to is IR porn especially the anal ones . I can't watch any other porn unless it has a black man .

So after 5 years of strictly watching IR anal porn I started almost fascinating about what it is like to be that girl getting fucked in the ass , I went and bought a few butt plugs and started watching it and masturbating w different butt plugs . That was t enough apparently I wanted to kno what that girl felt like so I went and bought a realistic Lex Steele dildo and sexy lingerie. I shave my whole entire body ( legs ass everything), do a enema , put in my butt plug and wear lingerie . I have long masturebation sessions and f*ck my lex dildo when watching IR anal porn . Afterwards I would feel disgusted and say I won't do it again but sooner or later I get that weird urge when watching porn like I want something in my ass (only 1-2 times a month max)

For the record I have never felt attracted to men never done anything gay/bi ect . I've always been with very hot girls and love women.
So after doing that for a few year it have led to fantasizing thoughts about wanting to be with Sean Michaels , Lex , Mandingo and Flash brown . Really only those 4 am I sexually attracted to and if I were in one of my moods and one of them were in a room and nobody would find out about it I would totally suck them off n let them have their way with me . I don't know what it is but something about there black cocks ? How they are shiny when they slide out or their size IDK but it make me wanna suck them ?? I honestly don't know what it is but I'm obsessed and can't stop fantasizing about being with one of them especially Sean Michaels he's the only man in my life I've ever thought was absolutely sexy , well the others too but especially him .anyway I do t kno what to do cuz I don't want it to progress any further to where I end up going to sum sex club n seeking a black man out to fulfill my weird fantasy.

Dose anyone else have this happen or similar thing ? Also girls do you share same kinda thoughts about black men ? Please anyone share thoughts . Thanks

 

[stovepipe]

Dude, I got half way and had to stop. You got some problems man. That's some sick twisted shit you're doing. Please tell us it's a joke?

 

[swilow]

^How is it sick and twisted? Its just masturbation, though he is taking it to admirable lengths. Your comment is a bit rude TBH. There's nothing wrong with his fantasies.

I don't see any harm in most fantasies except if they bother you afterwards. They don't always represent things that we would really want to do. I've enacted some fantasies of my own only to be disappointed, though this is probably not the usual outcome. I'm not going to tell you to go out and let a black man fuck your ass to pieces mainly because you're married, but to each their own. For me, I am male and in a 12 year heterosexual relationship. I've had sex with guys before and used to even 'sort of' identify as bi. I don't anymore, my feelings of that nature seem to have diminished as I've aged, which is actually disappointing in some ways. In retrospect, most of those experiences were really erotic mainly because it felt so unusual. Fantasy is very different from the flesh and blood and sensory reality of a thing in my experience.

 

[theredgiant]

Well....stop wearing the lingerie....everything else is fine because it's not real it's all in your head. Nobody knows what you are thinking. Your thoughts are totally private so fantasize about whatever you want. Wanting to do something and doing it are very different. My wife wants to put stuff in my butt and lick my butt and I constantly have to tell her no...she thinks lesbian sex is gross but playing with a man's butthole is fine...lol this world is wild man

 

[d1nach]

I had a girl do me with a strapon. Dont be so anal about it. Your anus has nerve ends that are the same as the ones that control seminle fluid and penile contractions.

 

[Mysterie]

do what you want , there is nothing wrong with anal play or being attracted to the same sex, or being turned on by wearing lingerie. why are you disgusted with yourself after?

 

[d1nach]

asshamer i notice your interests are Deep dickings mens ass and occuation pro deep dicker ... lmao thats hillarious I love it