Mental Health Inability to get "high" + chronic depression.

[Tinsley]

This is the first post I've ever made on here, so my apologies if this is the wrong place to put this or if I'm doing this wrong.
I've been clean for almost 2yrs, and was on heroin and meth daily for about 4yrs before that, with occasional use of crack, pills, and hallucinogens. I definitely noticed an effect from the drugs, or I wouldn't have continued to use them, but I never noticed any rush or euphoria. I was dating a heroin supplier so I definitely didn't just have shit stuff, and I was shooting pretty much everything I could. I also overdosed and died for several minutes a total of 13 times, with 7 requiring an ambulance and not just being shot up with a stim by a friend. So I would assume the issue wasn't not using enough.
I essentially used heroin and meth to help with PTSD symptoms, particularly flashbacks when sleeping. I was scared to sleep, so I used meth to wake up and heroin to become unconscious without dreaming.
Anyway, point of all this is that I feel like my chronic depression (I'm 22 and was a victim of CSA at age 8 and generally didn't have a very nice time with life after that) might be connected to my apparent inability to achieve the same kind of high that most people who use these drugs are looking for. Is there some kind of chemical fuckery that could keep me from experiencing both drug induced highs and normal levels of happiness or contentedness?
Thanks, and I'm sorry that this is so long, I just wanted to give a decent sense of background!

 

[Shady's Fox]

You can't be so depressed to the point where you don't feel high. It's illogical but I didn't said impossible although it doesn't make any sense, you would still feel the rush, but you would need a bit more than your basic dose. Are you are on any medications, SSRIs? It could be some correlation between not having empathy and not being able to get high but I could be wrong because I don't think personality/character traits could influence the level of high? So you have - Dopamine/Serotonin - these 2 dictate in the end. I think your system could be fucked up by some past events/trauma, or maybe an accident if you had one.

 

[Tinsley]

You can't be so depressed to the point where you don't feel high. It's illogical but I didn't said impossible although it doesn't make any sense, you would still feel the rush, but you would need a bit more than your basic dose. Are you are on any medications, SSRIs? It could be some correlation between not having empathy and not being able to get high but I could be wrong because I don't think personality/character traits could influence the level of high? So you have - Dopamine/Serotonin - these 2 dictate in the end. I think your system could be fucked up by some past events/trauma, or maybe an accident if you had one.

Yeah, I didn't mean that the depression was preventing me from getting high. I was more wondering if there could be a common source, such as a lack of dopamine or serotonin, etc.

 

[Wilson Wilson]

This is an interesting one. You're saying you did meth and heroin and neither one got you high?

I don't think it's related to depression as such, I have depression and anxiety but can still get high especially on opiates. My girlfriend has other mental illnesses and also gets high.

That said, there are just some people who don't get euphoria from either opiates or amphetamines. It's all in the individual brain chemistry.

 

[Shady's Fox]

Still doesn't make any fuckin sense, at least for me, maybe for someone else does. Serotonine is a very important mood regulator neurotransmitter and dopamine is more associated with motivation and reward, so if you lack dopamine you will feel less inclined to do a specific action. So as you didn't answer any of my questions and if you don't have any mental illness, the bottom line will be that what you experience now it's called '' the ceiling ''. This is the most common mistake regarding most drug users who don't have self-control and can't have a 2week rule. And so your tolerance has gone through the roof. Take a break, eat, sleep well, be healthy.

 

[Wilson Wilson]

I can tell you for a fact there's plenty of people who simply don't get high on opiates. I've had people text me offering to sell their opiate scripts because "it just makes me sick and itchy." I am of course happy to take it off their hands.

As for stims, definitely not everyone's cup of tea, especially if you are already anxious. Me personally I can only do low doses of amphetamine. Too much is just unpleasant and causes panic attacks. Low doses are useful, but also don't cause much euphoria once you have a tolerance.

So I don't find this too strange and definitely not unbelievable.

 

[Tinsley]

Still doesn't make any fuckin sense, at least for me, maybe for someone else does. Serotonine is a very important mood regulator neurotransmitter and dopamine is more associated with motivation and reward, so if you lack dopamine you will feel less inclined to do a specific action. So as you didn't answer any of my questions and if you don't have any mental illness, the bottom line will be that what you experience now it's called '' the ceiling ''. This is the most common mistake regarding most drug users who don't have self-control and can't have a 2week rule. And so your tolerance has gone through the roof. Take a break, eat, sleep well, be healthy.

Sorry, it looks like my reply posted only part of what I typed up, sorry about that. I'm on a lot of meds at the moment but I've used while not on any meds and still not gotten a rush or any euphoria, etc. As far as mental illness, I've been diagnosed with MDD (depression), GAD (anxiety), PTSD, AN (anorexia), as well as various substance abuse disorders. I don't think its anything to do with tolerance, because I was clean for 2yrs and this is the first time I've used since then. I'm sorry that my post didn't make sense to you, but thank you for replying anyway.

 

[Tinsley]

I can tell you for a fact there's plenty of people who simply don't get high on opiates. I've had people text me offering to sell their opiate scripts because "it just makes me sick and itchy." I am of course happy to take it off their hands.

As for stims, definitely not everyone's cup of tea, especially if you are already anxious. Me personally I can only do low doses of amphetamine. Too much is just unpleasant and causes panic attacks. Low doses are useful, but also don't cause much euphoria once you have a tolerance.

So I don't find this too strange and definitely not unbelievable.

Thanks! I definitely still like meth and heroin etc., I just only get "awake"/spun or go unconscious when using, no mental high at all really. So it's possible that I'm just incapable of achieving a mental high? That seems crazy to me but I'm not sure what other explanation there is really. Either way thank you

 

[Wilson Wilson]

Thanks! I definitely still like meth and heroin etc., I just only get "awake"/spun or go unconscious when using, no mental high at all really. So it's possible that I'm just incapable of achieving a mental high? That seems crazy to me but I'm not sure what other explanation there is really. Either way thank you

It is possible yes. It's also possible that if you are on psych meds especially antipsychotics they could be blocking any high you would normally get. Also I don't know about anyone else but opiates will overpower the feeling of stims easily for me. There's a lot of factors going into it.

 

[Shady's Fox]

yeah dont worry bout it, the software sometimes get glitched but if you find a bug please report to @TheLoveBandit or any Sr.Mod, there aren't many so you will get ur issue solved/figured quick, I guess. Depending on platform it may seem resonable, I had few glitches in my exp with my old browsers and since 1 week when I found out about a thing called ''Brave'' I was amazed, no perfomance issues, moves as it should. So my advice would be to use a more suitable browser or unistall useless extensions if you have because it may interfere though I could be wrong, I am not a tehnician so isn't my place to speak up. Regarding your post, it wasn't very detailed or clearly expressed so as any other would have a bit of doubts again you didn't mention what meds you take, who gives you? Be careful what you take you know the film with hospitals/psychiatrists, you go with a flu you get out with fucks knows, Crazy

 

[Wilson Wilson]

Brave is a decent browser especially for privacy but it is a fork of Chromium so uses the same engine as Chrome. If it is much faster than Chrome for you then it's probably because you have a lot of tabs, extensions, temporary files, cookies, etc slowing down Chrome. That said there's nothing wrong with using Brave instead. You can install Chrome extensions on Brave since they're basically the same browser. uBlock Origin and HTTPS Everywhere are always worth having.

Anyway I'll stop derailing the thread with tech advice lol.