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TDS in a bad place...

sconnie420

sconnie420

Ex-Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 9, 2012
Messages
1,185
Location
midwest
where to go, when there's nowhere to go..

In such a bad place right now and I do t know what to do..I'm scared depressed and idw do this anymore..I cnt stop crying and wishing for an end.. I have noone and nothing..if I killed myself, noone would even notice..I wouldn't be missed, I'm unloveable, and a horrible waste of space..idk what to do anymore..I just want an end..
 
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Why do you feel like this?
Trust me there are people who care about you, and people would miss you.<3
 
try to relax and realize that it's TEMPORARY.
it will change.
the only constant thing is change.
I've been there many times,you're not alone.
if nothing else,someone on the internet will read your p[ost and relate and feel a bit better.
you are helping people just by sticking to this forum.

wishing you serenity.
 
My whole life is falling apart and I didn't take my pill today so its making it worse..I'm having a really hard time dealing w my ex leaving me and going to other women..
Noone cares..noone..

I'm atheist but someone please pray for me..
 
what sort of pill and why didn't you take it?
you say that nobody cares, but you are so wrong.
That is why there are threads and forums such as this,
OK, so we may not know you, and are not able to have any direct input into you or your situation, but just that there are people who believe in your life and willing to take the time to suggest or support you is proof that the world and the inhabitants are worth hanging round for.
I believe, that people don't just post shit on here to make themselves feel better about themselves, (if that were the case, I couldn't really be bothered, as I am inherently lazy).
I would suggest that it is because they really do care.
I am sorry, I cannot offer any solutions, or promise that it will get better, all I can say is that there are people that do care, for what its worth. I won't pray for you, as I am atheist also, instead, I am sending my feelings via a more direct method, (Bluelight) and I hope that you find the strength to harness the energies that surround you to make your life better.<3
 
My anti depressant..I forgot to bc I was at the beach..I'm just going through soo much right now and doing it alone is killing me.
 
None of this is meant to sound harsh I've went through some shit recently myself.

Make it through this for one for yourself and two to spite the motherfucker that left you. realize that you are damn sure strong enough to make it through a breakup and furthermore you don't need another person to survive. You don't need another's validation to make you any more happy than you can be without them. True strength lies in dealing with life's hardships head on, and without fear.

You will be okay, and possibly better than you were before. All of this is said with your well being in mind and are things I've told myself recently that made me feel better.

I read in another one of your posts about him having dates set up and shit. He will hurt too and is trying to fill that with other people. It was a long time and it will take time. That's all it will take. You are gonna be alright. Love can hurt but that just means you have a heart. I don't regret having my heart broken for it only means I'm a good enough person to have a heart. My ex doesn't seem like she did and that's not on me. I'll survive and someone who deserves the love I have hopefully will be the next one I give it to.
 
I have felt the same way. The feelings of worthlessness come and go. I have those feelings even though I am not alone. I will pray for you. <3
 
Thnx sine I appreciate your kind words..this is the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life..it wouldd be so much easier if I had a support system. He took so much from me w/ this split. For better or worse, ill never be the same again.

The saddest thing is, is I'm raising my niece, that's her uncle all she's ever known..how do u tell a 9 yr old, she's never gna see her uncle agai ..how do u raise a healthy happy kid w no male role model..who's going to teach her that there are good men out there? If there are.. ugg, my life.
 
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NP. I hate to see people hurting. The child in the middle is a tough situation and she's not at a good age to go through that but... Be strong for her too. Things will work out for real. You never know what door will open for you especially in regards to relationships.

Anytime you need to talk you can pm me I'll lift your spirits :)
 
Sconnie, I'm sorry you have to go through this and breakups can be so hard. I guess it's harder because it's not something you wanted and kind of forced on you. You two were together a long time, of course you must be devastated! It's ok to feel sad, depressed, hopeless, angry, etc. You're a human being, not a robot that can just switch your feelings off. I sent you a pm and sorry it's real long! One thing I wanted to say but forgot:

I had lost my fiancé many years ago in a car accident. When I went back to work the following week, it was hard to keep myself together. My boss was going through a bad divorce. She told me "I know you're grieving but it's a lot harder when a man leaves you." I didn't know what to say and a couple of my co-workers thought that was a thoughtless thing to say. I didn't understand that. But after a horrible breakup I had not long ago, I'm starting to believe it now.

It's hard to say goodbye when your loved one dies unexpectedly, still eventually you come to terms with it the best you can. When someone breaks up with you, there's still that little bit of hope that the relationship can be salvaged. That person is still around, doing who knows what and you just want things the way they used to be. You have to let him go and do his thing, whatever that may be.

Your niece might be confused and that's normal. You're grieving and it's alright to cry and if she asks be honest and tell her that you miss him. You don't have to go into all the details but tell her that uncle and you are no longer together. Kids are very intuitive so there's no use hiding it from her. But try to plan activities to keep busy with your niece to keep some sense of normalcy if that's possible. I'm a recovering Catholic and praying for you! <3
 
Also, just know you also have to be strong for your niece. Imagine how devastated she would be to lose you. It is a whole different ballgame when there is a child depending on you. You are concerned about her future so that is a good sign regarding sticking around on this earth even though it feels like shit right now.
 
Everyday is getting a little easier..I can't believe how hard this has been on me.the kid keeps me sane but at the same time its hard

I hope someday I can meet a good man who won't run at the first sign of trouble, esp aftr so long..
 
Forgot to mention, make sure you take your antidepressants every day. When I was prescribed venlaxafine (Effexor) sometimes I would forget to take it. I would really get upset and cry for no apparent reason. Then realize I forgot to take my dose for that day or day before. Being on SSRI's was an emotional roller coaster at times for me.

Don't worry about meeting another man just yet. You need some "me time." <3
I hope today goes better for you Sconnie and tomorrow will be even better!
 
Thnx my dear..ya the meds do kinda fuck me up..makes it worse when I forgst to take em..everyday gets a little easier...
 
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