BuriedJade
Bluelighter
I found myself stuck in a moment today, at the grocery store. I tried to lose my thought, but it lingered like a child who's lost her mother, and needs to cling on to the first person she sees. "Have I lost my youth already?" I wondered as I walked by the newest issue of YM; a magazine I used to loyally read a couple of years ago. As the airbrused closeup of Britney Spears stared back at me, her face glowing with perfection, and false innocence, I couldn't help but feel the deepest sense of sorrow. "She's only a year younger than I am. I've had all these years of school, voice lessons, acting classes... and I'm a nobody." I ran to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. As I stared at my reflection, I thought: "I'm beautiful by today's standards... but there must be SOMETHING wrong with me." I started crying (how stupid is that???), because I suddenly felt worthless. I felt as though my life had already passed me by. The dreams I was so sure of coming true, became futile hopes left in the past. Then an elderly lady walked into the restroom and asked me why such a pretty girl was crying. I smiled through my teary face and assured her I was fine, and I hugged her. As I left the restroom, I walked over to the checkout and picked up the magazine. I stared at her face, and smiled as I put the magazine back. She's only an airbrused plastic image. I'm me, I thought. I'm real, imperfections and all.
