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I'm pregnant and I drank...

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n3ophy7e

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I am a recovering alcoholic and polydrug addict, but I have been totally sober for my whole pregnancy. However yesterday I was triggered by the news that my parents aren't coming to my baby shower because they already have a lunch planned with their friends. Pffft, shitty parents. This brought up a lot of anger and resentment that I have about my parents, and on the way home from work I bought a bottle of wine. I know that there are many points in between buying the bottle and drinking it, that I could've chosen to NOT drink it. But the addict switch flicked on in my brain and I said "fuck it" and drank the bottle. It was 7 standard drinks. I'm 21 weeks pregnant, so about half-way. We had the 20-week ultrasound on Thursday and physically everything is perfect with our baby. I feel extremely guilty about it today and I hope that I haven't done any damage to him. My partner is absolutely LIVID and is threatening to end our relationship. I feel strong enough that I can be sober again, but I'm just overwhelmed with guilt and regret.

That's it, really. I don't know what else to say. I guess I just needed to post this somewhere.
 
n3ophy7e said:
I am a recovering alcoholic and polydrug addict, but I have been totally sober for my whole pregnancy. However yesterday I was triggered by the news that my parents aren't coming to my baby shower because they already have a lunch planned with their friends. Pffft, shitty parents. This brought up a lot of anger and resentment that I have about my parents, and on the way home from work I bought a bottle of wine. I know that there are many points in between buying the bottle and drinking it, that I could've chosen to NOT drink it. But the addict switch flicked on in my brain and I said "fuck it" and drank the bottle. It was 7 standard drinks. I'm 21 weeks pregnant, so about half-way. We had the 20-week ultrasound on Thursday and physically everything is perfect with our baby. I feel extremely guilty about it today and I hope that I haven't done any damage to him. My partner is absolutely LIVID and is threatening to end our relationship. I feel strong enough that I can be sober again, but I'm just overwhelmed with guilt and regret.

That's it, really. I don't know what else to say. I guess I just needed to post this somewhere.
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Mate I'm so sorry you're going through that, I know you must feel pretty damn guilty. Hopefully your partner forgives this one slip up.

I doubt you've done any real damage, just make sure to not make it a habit. All of the progress you made doesn't go away with one slip, so don't beat yourself up too bad. I let myself slip back in February with some wine, and I turned it into a full relapse with shooting meth and all. Just don't let it escalate and you'll be good.

I'm here if you ever need someone to talk to about it. <3
 
I can see his point of view he is probably so worried you will slide again at this important time in your life . Realize it was a mistake and a one time slip should not hurt baby hopefully . Just don’t let it happen again your baby is innocent and doesn’t deserve to be harmed while trying to grow. No judgement here I had to taper my oxy the first couple months of my pregnancy to finally quit while pregnant . Best wishes 💓
 
Hey girl. So sorry that you are feeling alone and guilty right now. If it helps at all one bottle of wine did NO harm to the baby. You are human, you were triggered, and you slipped up. I know you wish it wouldn't have happened but it did and a bottle of wine does not equate to what your partner threatened you with. If he/she is so narrow minded that they don't understand hormones and anger in pregnancy well... they need an education. Obviously it was a spur of the moment thing to do and we have all done that.

Wipe your tears, the baby is fine and so are you. I surely don't condone heavy drinking in pregnant women but most people would be surprised how OB/GYN's feel about occasional glasses of wine during pregnancy. One or two glasses every few weeks ( with dinner or before bed ) isn't as frowned upon as people think. Society frowns on it more than the professionals do.

I can understand your partner being disappointed but threatening to leave you is uncalled for. Just adds insult to injury. Not productive in the slightest. I'm sure he/she isn't perfect . None of us are. A little compassion could have gone a long way. Shoulders back, chin up, march on. You and the baby are gonna be just fine and your partner will just have to deal with it. Love and hugs from Nurse Ratched.
 
Stay strong, you are an amazing person who made a mistake imo. You are gonna be a great mum 🌈
My PM's open anytime if you ever need to get anything off your chest anything at all anytime I would never ever judge. I've never been pregnant so I don't understand hormones or anything but I get how hard recovery can be.
 
sorry to hear and yea it sucks but it happened and don't do it again....

he needs to react harshly so you know he means business and you don't do it again - so i kinda don't blame him for reacting harshly

you're way better off taking a bong hit than drinking while preggers
 
But you will hold off right? I mean if you resort to something like cannabis also not recommended by a doctor probably in many cases you wouldn't put the baby in danger of being born with FAS but as someone said it is the pattern of drinking while pregnant that can interrupt the processes of a healthy pregnancy.

One of my uncles with a family of six healthy kids four brothers he was the only one with it grandmother drank the whole time I would imagine getting stressful for he was the last of the litter the runt if you will he does look a little off but has a great sense of humor and worked his entire life at an award winning chain of grocery stores in this region was recognized recently for his decades of commitment to stocking the freezers overnight married a coworker lady from Georgia I was in the wedding as a boy her father brought up mason jars of Moonshine for it my cousins got into undoubtedly

Anyways long story short he drove a Camaro at one point and Firebird and was a badass but a big beer drinker like keg in his inherited finished basement bar and always have thirty cases going when I visit and he is loved by his family it didn't ruin his life at all like he has a decent one for him

Also a Mustang and inground pool with beautiful cement patio around it and scenic wild forest behind their lush lawn alongside a babbling creek under a stone bridge we explored under as children beside a gorgeous bike path through lush wild forest they were ballin still are set wife got her fathers inheritance on top of his like ballin hard style but not mansionesque millionaire lifestyle amyways materiality aside I think they are slaves to substance deep down but compassion is still deserved to all creation.

I am sure it is scary for you but hope you can put it behind you and have nothing this serious to be concerned over much longer
 
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The very dangerous effects of alcohol to unborn happen very early, before many women even know they are pregnant. So your baby is fine!!

Im sorry your your parents are being idiots ❤️

How do you deal with any future situation better?

Don’t beat yourself up❤️
 
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Nah one bottle of wine isn't gonna have any harmful effects ; don't fret.

PS explain to me though what the point of 'baby showers' is because I don't get it.
People expect congrats and presents these days for managing the simple feat of reproduction? And then you also have to have another special occasion once you know whether it's got a baby dick or a baby vag, apparently.
What happened to simply saying 'hey I'm gonna have a kid' and people responding 'how lovely for you' , and saving the party for when the little sprog's actually arrived in the world -?
 
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The UltimateFixx said:
PS explain to me though what the point of 'baby showers' is because I don't get it.
People expect congrats and presents these days for managing the simple feat of reproduction? And then you also have to have another special occasion once you know whether it's got a baby dick or a baby vag, apparently.
What happened to simply saying 'hey I'm gonna have a kid' and people responding 'how lovely for you' , and saving the party for when the little sprog's actually arrived in the world -?
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For me, it's really more of a get-together to celebrate that I finally got my shit together in life and am being a responsible adult lol. Usually baby showers involve a fuck-tonne of gifts, but we have asked for hand-me-downs and well-wishes only. I hate the idea of people spending money at a time like this, plus I much prefer that people recycle things wherever possible. It turns out that with all the secondhand stuff we're getting, we're gonna have TOO MUCH hahaha. But at least it's all secondhand. And then we can pass it on to someone who wants/needs it later on.
 
Thank you everyone for your words of kindness, frankness and support. My partner and I have worked through it, and I'm feeling better about everything. I'm sure my baby is fine, and if he isn't, we will cope with it.
 
n3ophy7e said:
I am a recovering alcoholic and polydrug addict, but I have been totally sober for my whole pregnancy. However yesterday I was triggered by the news that my parents aren't coming to my baby shower because they already have a lunch planned with their friends. Pffft, shitty parents. This brought up a lot of anger and resentment that I have about my parents, and on the way home from work I bought a bottle of wine. I know that there are many points in between buying the bottle and drinking it, that I could've chosen to NOT drink it. But the addict switch flicked on in my brain and I said "fuck it" and drank the bottle. It was 7 standard drinks. I'm 21 weeks pregnant, so about half-way. We had the 20-week ultrasound on Thursday and physically everything is perfect with our baby. I feel extremely guilty about it today and I hope that I haven't done any damage to him. My partner is absolutely LIVID and is threatening to end our relationship. I feel strong enough that I can be sober again, but I'm just overwhelmed with guilt and regret.

That's it, really. I don't know what else to say. I guess I just needed to post this somewhere.
Click to expand...
n3ophy7e,

The fact you made this post shows how much of an awesome mother you are going to be. It takes a lot of guts to admit to something like this even though so many of us would/have slipped up in a simular way. I am so excited about your baby!!! Today is a new day and i am sure it will have caused no damage on this once off!

Much love- Andrew <3
 
andyturbo said:
n3ophy7e,

The fact you made this post shows how much of an awesome mother you are going to be. It takes a lot of guts to admit to something like this even though so many of us would/have slipped up in a simular way. I am so excited about your baby!!! Today is a new day and i am sure it will have caused no damage on this once off!

Much love- Andrew <3
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Thank you so much my friend <3
 
So, yeah, my thoughts mimic other people in the thread. You shouldn't beat yourself up about this at all. It sounds like you're doing great.

At the end of the day, people do what they can do.

Everyone has their limits.

A bottle of wine isn't the end of the world.

There is no study that I'm aware of that indicates otherwise.

<3
 
birdup said:
So, yeah, my thoughts mimic other people in the thread. You shouldn't beat yourself up about this at all. It sounds like you're doing great.

At the end of the day, people do what they can do.

Everyone has their limits.

A bottle of wine isn't the end of the world.

There is no study that I'm aware of that indicates otherwise.

<3
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I love your display picture birdup! Its beautiful!
 
My moms drank her ass off while pregnant with me and my brother. My brother is gone now (nothing he did caused this) and I am still here but a mess. :) I can deal with shit fairly well "sober" but my issues are mainly based in her boyfriends and step dads freaky ass tendencies towards kids. Plus all the blunt force traumas and whatnot throughout my life so it is a mess. ;)
Not about me: I totally agree that if you are worried about this now you will be a perfect moms... wish I had you as a mom you woulda protected us instead of turning a blind eye.
First child?
 
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