PepperSocks
Bluelight Crew
The reason I'm so depressed and wants to start over isn't bc I don't have a lot of friends or don't have a girlfriend , never had a job but it's bc I have a speech impediment . I thought by doing drugs(weed ) that maybe there will be a some little miracle that my speech impedimentt goes away during I'm high . But it didn't it just made things worse . But I keep smoking weed to see if that one time my speech impediment will go away . So now I'm still searching for that drug to make my speech problem disapear for a little . But LSD is probaly not going to make me talk right so it's probaly going to make things worse . But that's the reason I do drugs not bc I want to have a good time but to find that cure for my speech impediment . Sorry I'm just going on about nothing now.
Dude, I can relate.

I started using drugs for pleasure, self-discovery, and escape. My early drug using career was mostly driven by pleasure but I started using psychedelics when I was 17 because of the psychological benefits I had started reading about. They did not cure my depression or social anxiety right away, but they did help me accept myself for who I am and just go with the flow. You're in a time of turmoil right now just as I was. The only way to get through it is go with the flow, live your life (as shitty as it may be right now), explore yourself, do what you feel like, and you will come out of it.
All my psychedelic experiences were solo, I never tripped with people. Psychedelics helped me find myself. They didn't fix anything overnight, not by a longshot, but it's the "finding of yourself" that will fix your problems and psychedelics help with that.
I still have my speech impediment, as bad as ever. I'm not a terribly social person, but at the same time I'm not afraid to be social. I used to be. I still feel awkward when I stutter in front of people I don't know, but I don't dwell on it like I used to, I just forget about it and go with the flow. If people don't want to hang out with me because I stutter or think I'm uncool, they can go on and walk. You don't need people like that.
I will say that I have used MDMA with people before (but not the first few experiences, those were special and they were solo). When I used MDMA with people the experience wasn't so much spiritual but the anxiety-free state MDMA provides gave me a few hours of complete speech fluency. The stutter comes right back when I came down though. Don't think of using MDMA on a regular basis to cure your speech impediment, it will cause you much harm, and in the end won't work anymore. MDMA is a "once a month tops" kind of thing. Those few hours of fluency to show you a "window" of what fluent life is like though.
If you cannot find MDMA crystal where you are you might have to resort to buying ecstasy pills (this was my situation). If you do this make sure you use http://www.pillreports.com and a testing kit. It is absolutely necessary. Anything besides MDMA in an ecstasy pill will not help you in the slightest and will probably make things worse in the long run.
You're about to embark on an incredible journey of self-discovery that could take a while. Don't rush it, time is the only thing that will help. Psychedelics will catalyze your self-discovery but ultimately it will take time.
If you ever want to talk about anything don't hesitate to send me a PM. I wish you the best of luck in your journey my friend.
