ignorant friends

Jean-Paul

Bluelighter
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Dec 30, 2011
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how do you respond to someone who has told you it's "silly" for you to use a chemical as a "crutch"? this person is being an absolute uneducated asshole and i am sick of trying to defend myself. i made a comment about how i drink for my anxiety when i don't have medication. this is simply what i do, how i manage. when i was a little kid and had OCD my parents thought it was for attention and i was making it up, because they were ignorant. this rings of the same thing to me. have you had people tell you this, if you have a dual diagnosis (disorder and substance issues). i really don't see drinking to soothe my nerves as something this stoner has any right to comment on. it's not like i said i was back to shooting up, but only to cure depression. in my opinion, friends should be understanding and not try to come up with a bunch of answers and "outsmart" you about a problem they think you have. he even claimed i was being self-pitying just for being honest about it and telling people. my answer is that hiding it should be unnecessary if those people are worthy of being in my life. they aren't fucking employers. what do you think?
 
I think that if you are being honest with yourself, it doesn't matter what someone else has to say about it. I'd worry less about what other people think...
 
Yes, I agree with you. My friends tell me this practically every day, while at the same time being hypocrites and taking the same chemicals as I am!
 
I do not know your friend, and I do not have your friend's side of the story available to me, but perhaps your friend meant that you should use something other than a chemical like alcohol to cope with your anxiety.
 
People who don't have mental health issues will never fully understand those who do, regardless if you are adding drugs to the picture or not. I've lost friends who thought that I should just "decide to be happy" when I've been fatally depressed. There is so much ignorance around mental health, suffering, and suicide in this society that it's mind boggling.

Then try telling people that you need to medicate or you'll fall off the edge. You can a whole host of other responses, especially if your medications of choice are illegal.

It's one thing if your friend is ignorant but is open to being educated; it's quite another thing if they are being willfully ignorant and won't support you. Cut those shitheads loose, you don't need them in your life.
 
Jean-Paul said:
i really don't see drinking to soothe my nerves as something this stoner has any right to comment on.

To me, it would seem that this isn't really the crux of the issue. Your friends have the 'right' to comment on anything, but you can use your knowledge about your friends' wisdom, experience, intentions, motives, and so on, to decide whether their opinion is worthwhile to you.

Friends don't have to agree on everything. Just because you and your friend disagree on this issue doesn't mean you can't be friends. It also doesn't mean you have to, if you decide that acceptance and understanding of this part of you is something you require of your friends. It's ultimately upto you to decide what is and isn't acceptable to you in a friend.

For me, disagreeing on a point isn't necessarily important. But if your friend can't remain respectful, and instead resorts to name calling and trying to shame you, perhaps it is time to re evaluate whether they're a positive aspect in your life.
 
I have to say if I got worked up about every single comment my friends have made to me in relation to my drug issues, I'd be pretty pissed off indeed :D
No but seriously, you don't seem to like that person so I don't really think you should hang out with him. There doesn't seem to be much point to that. There's always gonna be people judging us for who we are or how we choose to live life anyway.
 
I have a dual diagnostic social anxity and opiate addiction I know actually how u feel. I used to go to duel diagnostic groups you should try going to one some day. Their not big groups like 8 people but it's real nice to be with people just like you well almost like you.
 
i've just stopped talking to my ignorant friends about it. they don't understand and think they do, it's friggen annoying. fuck that, you can go fuck yourself with your ignorant beliefs.
 
how do you respond to someone who has told you it's "silly" for you to use a chemical as a "crutch"?

it could be their way of saying there are better things out there for medication or a "crutch" than drugs. If you think of it, it is kind of silly to take a drug to self-medicate i mean if your hurt mentally or emotionally doing a drug that could hurt you physically would certainly not make things better. But drugs are one of the easiest escapes hence why it is such a popular way of self-medication

but to answer your question of how to respond: remain calm and tell them your side of the story and why you and or so many other people fall victim to drugs as a crutch
 
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