Larr_E
Bluelighter
When we graduated from High School together you said you were going to take a year off to relax. You ended up getting a job and never went back to school. I know you took the placement test but never followed through. Then you said that once out of school you'd stop screwing around with different girls and try the monogamy thing. I really think that one girl would be good for you. All you did was bounce from one mindless skank to the next. You got a job where they worked you to death What did you do to make amends? You partied 24/7. You popped pills left and right like they were chewable vitamins and smoked weed like tobacco. Your body couldn't handle the intense work and play so every few months your immune system said "fuck you asshole" and hurt you bad. So it came down to quit raving or quit work. You choose to quit work. So you got a job in sales making double the money in half the time but it wasn't stable. The more money you made the harder you partied. Once again, every few months this would catch up with you. So you gave up partying for a while but burned your "money making" bridges in sales due to past partying. Its sad that sales is the one thing in life you are good at, yet you are intent on screwing yourself every chance you get. They offered you management position and you said no because you didn't want the responsibility. In the middle of all the partying and endless list of dead end jobs and jobs that could have lead somewhere but didn't, you had 2 nephews and a goddaughter. The relationship between you and your nephews is great but you haven't seen your goddaughter in over a year. She's almost 4 now and you don't even know where she lives anymore. Remember that time you took her to the beach? Just the two of you. She played in the water and fell asleep on your chest. She has no father figure in her life. You were her only male model in her tiny world. You let that all go because you couldn't get along with your comadre. You're 22 now and in April you'll be 23. All the dreams you had in younger days are dwindling into a shadow of what they once were, unrecognizable to all but you and I. So the time is here and now. I'm asking what you plan to do with yourself. I'm asking because I love you. I was with you through all the bullshit you put me through. Even when I told you not to do ill will, I still had you on my radar when you did. You are my best friend but all I can do is ask of you to do right by yourself. I can't make you walk the path. All I can do is help you read the map. All I am is a reflection in the mirror but I ask you not to hurt me anymore. I love you but if you think that the only person you hurt is yourself then you're wrong. When you cry in view of a mirror then there are two people crying and even if you can't see me, i'm always there...
