I want sex too much?!?

[sms143]

My relationship is amazing w my husband, and I get it that life happens.
We have been married for 4 yrs, total of 10 yrs together.
Use toys,and other ppl are in the mix. As in 3somes and 4somes.
We both get busy, and have a almost 2 yr old...
I'm 24 and he is 27.
But gah....slowly the sex decreases and decreases more.
I miss the days were we couldn't get enough of each other.
I just feel unwanted lately.
I guess this is just what happens?
Anyone been in my shoes before?
I guess I am a freak, bc I could still do it multiple times a day.

 

[Clitnhawk]

Being together for 10 years, doing all kinds of kinky shit... You've done what many don't do until they're 40.

But you both work, have life besides the bedroom.. And you have a VERY active 2yr child that requires your time and energy (how people do with 2, 3, 4+ kids is holy shit?!)

Make sure that AT LEAST, ONCE A MONTH - the two of you have a date night... No baby. A hotel room (maybe) - go out, dance, socialize... etc. Go to concerts, go to parties... do things.

 

[pofacedhoe]

Being together for 10 years, doing all kinds of kinky shit... You've done what many don't do until they're 40.

But you both work, have life besides the bedroom.. And you have a VERY active 2yr child that requires your time and energy (how people do with 2, 3, 4+ kids is holy shit?!)

Make sure that AT LEAST, ONCE A MONTH - the two of you have a date night... No baby. A hotel room (maybe) - go out, dance, socialize... etc. Go to concerts, go to parties... do things.

this!!!

of course life will grind you down.

successful long happy marriages rely on making time for just each other.

dates, restaurant, nature walk without the kids etc.

the absence of mundanity is essential for these evening/weekends to work.

 

[-=SS=-]

I would come to terms with the fact you can't keep that pace up forever. Especially for men.. you burn out eventually. I would experiment with not orgasming for a period of time.. the longer the duration between orgasms (as in days/weeks), the more intense it will be. Instead of fighting against what is always going to happen, embrace it.

 

[FURI]

I think every couple deals with this. Life, kids especially take time and energy. Think what you are going through is totally natural. Making sure you get a date night at least one a month as pofacedho suggested is a great suggestion. But I have a 5 year old and know all about mundane and it being easier said than done, but make time for each other, sounds like you guys has wonderful.chemistry before naturally things turned mundane due to work, routines, kids especially. Don't get me wrong I love my son and think kids are the best they wear on ya tho especially at 2 : ) I do wish you guys the best of luck

 

[llama112]

It's so hard when you are busy. It happens to a lot of couples when they are together for longer. You need to set aside times and dates. And you can't back out. Get a babysitter. Go out, even just to dinner or something, and actually have a date. Don't skip it because you are too tired or make other excuses

 

[sms143]

Thanks everyone! You always know what to say, and tell it like it is. We will be having a date night next week, and yesterday discussed how I feel we should be having more sex, and he agreed. It went well.

 

[Clitnhawk]

Sounds great. If you can, make it at least twice a month. Music concerts - GO to something you both like. My wife and I have 3 concerts to go to in the next 3 months. Marilyn Manson and Garbage, and a couple of local bands. Yeah, music and a little bit of drinking - we're both going to fucking like bunnies afterwards.

You said 3somes / 4somes... why not? Don't make it a monthly thing, of course. But maybe 1-3 times a year... Others I have talked to and agree with: tend to have sex with the SO afterwards and its even more HOT.

Being a parent doesn't mean you have to forget your adult side. I've seen a few people do that, and have warned them... "I'm going to be dad. Want to buy my sports car so I can get a mini-van and you won't see me clubbing anymore" - that, from a 27yr old man. No, I didn't buy his classic sports car - I hate that model.

Even go to clubs or what-nots that you've never been too. Make kid-nigh deals with other couples... ie: they watch your baby over night one weekend night, then you watch theirs when THEY want to go out.

have a great time!