I used to be hooked on opioids, mainly buprenorphine, oxy and morphine. At my worst, i took 300+ mg oxy per day. I spent two years clean, but i’ve come to terms that i need opioids, if not daily, then at least now and then. My tolerance is a LOT lower now: 25 mg oxy will make me content; 60 mg will make me nod, at least if i boost with benzos and atarax.
However, it’s either expensive or hard to get decent opioids. I won’t buy buprenorphine, cos two years on it gave me the most drawn out withdrawal i’ve experienced — leaving me in a state of pending doom, anxiety so intense that the word ’anxiety’ — at most — merely draw the contours of the incessant torture i experienced for almost two weeks: the devil’s creation, akathisia, temperature shifts from freezing to feverish sweating, the fatigue, accentuated by the edgy nervousness and inability to stay in one position for more than a millisecond, making it impossible to go to the bathroom if not for its sheer necessity, the extreme soreness in the rectal area, the insomnia and the perception of everything in the external reality as something hostile, as if the sharpness of sounds and noises take the appearance of large canine teeths, ready to eat your soul. The depression, the crying, the ennui, the hopelessness and emotional pain, so painful that it obscures anything else than the pain. And so on.
So, to my question, if i’m allowed to bortom the thread: would kratom be a decent option for me? The only cheap, available alternative is tramadol, and that doesn’t do it for me — even prefer loperamide in high doses, lolz.
If yes: which strain? My tolerance is not that high but i’m far from opioid naive.