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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

I have finally quit Mephedrone / M kat !

MindTricks

MindTricks

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 14, 2009
Messages
116
Location
England
Its very scary thinking about it... i have been addicted to it for about 2 years. I have been taking it every single weekend for about 2 years ! 2 grams minimum per season , sometimes taking it 3 - 4 times per week. Only weekends i didnt have it was because i was going away or when i couldn't score... which was very very rare. The amount of money i wasted OMG ! £40 minimum per week ! also had intense gambling addiction when i was on this drug... we talking loosing thousands of pounds in total. Scoring cut not clean mkat with some crap and still snorting it ! there was many times when it was cut with something horrible that i was close to calling ambulance. Getting in to bad situations with random druggies coz i was trying to score it wth all costs. I couldn't control it like some people... i couldn't just use it once in a while it had to be every single week ! I was so unhealthy and looked awful skinny
My room / cloth smelt of it all the time... i couldn't socialise with people with out this drug, everything was boring with out it. Drug was on my mind all the time, i couldn't have a weekend with out it. Talking to much shit on it then regretting it, the list goes on and on...... Oh just looking at it back makes me feel sick ! 2 years of this shit wow i thought it will never stop

I have been clean for almost 2 months and i will not have it again ! not even a single line of it neva ! i cant control it and use it once in a while so had to quit this shit for good ! More time passes it gets easier and easier


EDIT: i am going to bookmark this thread and every time i think about "how good mephedrone was" ill just read my post !
 
Good lad, keep it up! If you abuse meph a lot, especially for a year or so, then quitting can be a LOT harder than most people appreciate. I would rank it with methamphetamine in addictive stimulant potential. Just dont give in and use it again as a one off, ever, from now on. Meph has a characteristic of making previous bingers extremely prone to craving more and giving in to previous habits for a good 3-7 days or so, even after just a one off session.

If severely abused then the craving can last for months, but is totally controllable when you start to weigh the positives of not using with the negatives of using.
 
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fucking good job!

mephedrone is a particularly hard one to kick. its all in the mind, which in my view can be tougher to beat than physical
addiction.

had a similar experience myself with this stuff, worked in a headshop once upon a time, and the end result was not pretty!

i was a skinny, hollowed out dead version of myself.

took an intervention from a well meaning friend for me to realise it was either the possibility of an early grave, or quit.
and i have my doubts as to whether i would have quit before it was too late had it not been for that girl who got me to kick
the habit, i doubt id be here today. she genuinely thought i didnt have long left in me.

all of my outgoing personality and zest for life just died when this stuff took hold.

but, time is a healer!

good luck buddy!
 
Congratulations on quitting! I'm happy that you decided to quit for yourself, that's the most important part of quitting, and knowing that you realized what was wrong shows that you will do good with quitting :)
 
Thanks guys ! i feel so happy at the moment ! i am making massive changes with my life and it works :D meph was stopping me from making those changes. I still take drugs but its only occasional MDMA on the night out with my good friends to have some fun at the rave then go home, smoke a joint and go to sleep :) Non of my friends take meph and they all hate it so its even easier to quit it.
 
Hi MindTricks, my drug of choice too was Mephedrone. I can identify with how you feel and how hard it is to not have bouts of panic every minute about just getting some. Immediately after I quit I would have several episodes per day where I was consumed with fear and extreme yearning for the drug. I guess the idea in my head that I would never again be able to have something I loved so much caused it to become even more important to obtain.

I can say the bouts of "needing to get it" lasted a while. The first month I was a mess I thought about it every single day. It was always on my mind. I will say about 3 months into it I began to go a few days without thinking about it. It felt good for the first time to feel free from it. Whereas all of the other times I never wanted to be free from it. I NEEDED it. I wanted to need it.

I remember when I was fresh off it just the thought or better yet even talking out loud about it would make me physically shake. Every part of me right down to the core was shaking. Like I was standing in 10 degree weather with the wind blowing on me. It wasn't a scared shake, it was a shake my body was doing because I wanted it so bad and that yearning feeling had to be released somehow because it was such a strong feeling.

I can't quite remember but I would like to say when I reached a 6 month mark I could go a week or more without thinking about it. Now at almost 2 years I don't think about it. I actually am quite scared of it. More scared than I am of any other drug.

I have never been on another drug that turned me into such a selfish fiendish creature. I was honestly not myself on it and that is the scariest part. I do have minuscule amounts of self control with other drugs but Mephedrone was the only one I absolutely had none. It was very powerful over me. When you have a bag of Mephedrone you don't need anything else in the world. You don't need food or friends or a home.

I quit about 2 years ago. Mephedrone was a very unique drug to me. Unlike a lot of other drugs I would have panic attacks by the day after quitting just because I felt the need to immediately buy more.

There is hope after it. That extreme yearning and love for it will dissipate with time. You need to stay strong. I think that is a good idea to check back in this thread to remind yourself why. Even post your progress so you can receive some support and feedback. It isn't the end of the world. You don't need it to be happy. It is just very strong and very good at what it does in holding onto you.
 
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stardust.hero said:
When you have a bag of Mephedrone you don't need anything else in the world. You don't need food or friends or a home.
Click to expand...

...Until that bag of Mephedrone runs out, after which you really need all those necessities you'd been neglecting for so long. Only the lucky ones find that those options are still available to them.

This is partially why the disease model of addiction makes tremendous sense to me. What is evolutionarily advantageous about possessing a brain with deficits in executive regulation which leads to compulsive, irrational and self-destructive behavior?

...About as much as possessing an organ which metastasizes mutated cells across the body, leading to the growth of cancerous tumors.

Either way, fighting the battle is an intense, very often lifetime struggle that, if the initial stages are survived, leaves one with an entirely new and clarified appreciation for life - As it was meant to be enjoyed. You are supremely brave and you'll find all the support in the world here when you hit those inevitably difficult patches that lie ahead.

I like reminding myself that a "craving" is like an internally-corrupted piece of data in my brain. After that, I find it more difficult to justify acting on it, like I would have done (like, immediately) when using!

~ Vaya
 
Vaya said:
I like reminding myself that a "craving" is like an internally-corrupted piece of data in my brain. After that, I find it more difficult to justify acting on it, like I would have done (like, immediately) when using!

~ Vaya
Click to expand...

I love that! I work in software development and never thought to associate the corrupt data idea into my brain haha! Now I'm going to think about my "corrupted files" when I have cravings %)
 
harlans said:
I love that! I work in software development and never thought to associate the corrupt data idea into my brain haha! Now I'm going to think about my "corrupted files" when I have cravings %)
Click to expand...

Hahah man I feel like I've spent most of the past 5 months waiting for my brain to defrag :)
My system hasn't frozen yet....
 
congrats to you OP, mephedrone is the only drug ive ever been addicted to, and i take a lot of drugs, including opiates. i've only done it three times since new year, and i too used to do it at least once a week, during the summer of 2010 and 2011 i did it about three or four times a week, lost my job, house etc. told myself i'd never do it again around xmas 2011 but i seem to be able to control it now. it sure is one hell of an amazing substance...
 
Thanks for brining this thread up and for all positive comments :) Glad you guys quit it ! keep it up !

It has been roughly 6 months now and i am still clean ! it seem to be fading away from my mind more and more, now i can go for week or more with out thinking about it, soon it wont be on my mind at all !



stardust.hero said:
Hi MindTricks, my drug of choice too was Mephedrone. I can identify with how you feel and how hard it is to not have bouts of panic every minute about just getting some. Immediately after I quit I would have several episodes per day where I was consumed with fear and extreme yearning for the drug. I guess the idea in my head that I would never again be able to have something I loved so much caused it to become even more important to obtain.

I can say the bouts of "needing to get it" lasted a while. The first month I was a mess I thought about it every single day. It was always on my mind. I will say about 3 months into it I began to go a few days without thinking about it. It felt good for the first time to feel free from it. Whereas all of the other times I never wanted to be free from it. I NEEDED it. I wanted to need it.

I remember when I was fresh off it just the thought or better yet even talking out loud about it would make me physically shake. Every part of me right down to the core was shaking. Like I was standing in 10 degree weather with the wind blowing on me. It wasn't a scared shake, it was a shake my body was doing because I wanted it so bad and that yearning feeling had to be released somehow because it was such a strong feeling.

I can't quite remember but I would like to say when I reached a 6 month mark I could go a week or more without thinking about it. Now at almost 2 years I don't think about it. I actually am quite scared of it. More scared than I am of any other drug.

I have never been on another drug that turned me into such a selfish fiendish creature. I was honestly not myself on it and that is the scariest part. I do have minuscule amounts of self control with other drugs but Mephedrone was the only one I absolutely had none. It was very powerful over me. When you have a bag of Mephedrone you don't need anything else in the world. You don't need food or friends or a home.

I quit about 2 years ago. Mephedrone was a very unique drug to me. Unlike a lot of other drugs I would have panic attacks by the day after quitting just because I felt the need to immediately buy more.

There is hope after it. That extreme yearning and love for it will dissipate with time. You need to stay strong. I think that is a good idea to check back in this thread to remind yourself why. Even post your progress so you can receive some support and feedback. It isn't the end of the world. You don't need it to be happy. It is just very strong and very good at what it does in holding onto you.
Click to expand...

good read, i am glad you quit bro ! just like you said 6 month and i can go for week or more with out thinking about it, i cant wait for it to fully disappear from my head.
 
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