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I hate feminism rant

IzGood said:
While most people disagree with my rant, there is a smaller percentage which partially agree.

I think in today's world it's very politically incorrect to be anti-feminism.
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Not sure I agree with this. I hear a lot of younger women in Australia claiming to dislike feminism and vehemently declaring that they're not feminists. The irony is clearly lost on them (that being the women's liberation movement paved the way for them etc etc).

IzGood said:
But I'm not painting all women with the same brush and saying that all women should act a certain way. If a woman wants to be university qualified, independent, full time worker, fine! No problem but don't expect to be courted around like a woman if in essence you are acting a little bit like a man.

If a woman strives to be a housewife, have children, look after her husband, and not work, also fine, along with this comes being treated like a woman, being courted, having doors opened etc etc etc.

I don't think you can have best of both worlds. For example, be university qualified, career orientated, have a reasonable to high paying job and then expect the man to pay for dinner 8(
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I certainly don't expect a guy to pay for me and I don't particularly want them to. That said, if a guy pays for my meal, I'm not going to go off on a rant, I'm gracious about it; I just keep it in mind for next time when I shout him dinner or drinks or whatever. As far as opening doors and what not, I open doors for blokes if we're passing through the same door, the same way I would for a woman. It's courtesy.

I honestly can't comprehend men with opinions like yours: do you really want the sole financial responsibility of looking after your partner? Surely that would place a lot of pressure on men, it's difficult enough when people have children.

FYI - women aren't 'acting a little bit like a man' because they're educated and working. How is that acting like a man?

I'm not being combative. I'm genuinely scratching my head here ...
 
I'm referring to women who want both. As in best of both worlds. Independent, educated, free to do what they like but if they are in a relationship with a man, they expect the man to be "the man" and provide financially, open doors, pay for dinner etc etc.

Feminism equals equality and equality is what you will get if this woman wants it but along with this you lose part of the traditional chivalry and dominant leadership a man once possessed in a male-female relationship, and some females still want this but also want the good parts of feminism along with it.
 
^^
Fair enough. I don't agree with this either. I have to admit some women have adapted feminism to suit their current lifestyle and it can seem hypocritical.
 
the idea that feminism and common courtesy are somehow mutually exclusive is pretty stupid. again, op does not know meaning of the word "feminism".

you're making the (all too common) mistake of equating gender equality with gender 'sameness'.

alasdair
 
I don't understand why it is so hard to accept women as financially competent and career-driven and still treat them like ladies. I don't see this as a double-standard.

I think that this became obvious to me when I was in class and overheard a conversation between two young women; the first young woman said to the other, "yeah, I'm just here as sort of my fall-back. I'd really like to be a stay-at-home mother someday." I snickered, thinking that she must be unusual and surely no one else would feel the same way. But, to my surprise, the second young woman excitedly proclaimed that she, too, would be taking her college degree and using it as her fall-back on the off-chance she did not marry and would have to provide for herself. Needless to say, I was pretty angry.
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You can't do that anymore, and well, it's young girls saying this. They don't know the real world. You can have an undergrad degree, and try to go back into the workforce 20 years later and that degree won't mean shit. Besides, and undergrad isn't that much of a big deal. My area of expertise usually requires a degree, but in most cases, the interviewer would rather hear about your experience, and I played on my experience for years without a degree. I got one to back up my experience, but that's it. All a degree really did for me (undergrad..master's is a different story) was open doors for places that required a degree, which are few and far between.

As for men staying home with the kids, I don't have a problem with that, and you'd be surprised at how many men do it. Men are more focused on kids, IMO, and that's a great thing.

The problem for me is that I don't have kids and don't really plan on having them, so I run across men who just stay home and mooch off of me. If you want to stay home, stay home but fucking pick up a mop or a vacuum and do something. I pay for weekly house cleaning, so the man doesn't even need to clean. I have no problem if a man wants to do something non-traditional, but I do have a problem with a man who just wants to sit on his ass all day and do nothing. DO SOME-FUCKING-THING. That is my only issue, so my main issue is I find that men who want to stay home are mooches, whereas (for instance) my mom had me and my sister to watch and she cleaned the house and made sure we were taken care of, and fixed up the house, etc.
 
there are girls out there to suit pretty much every taste in gender roles. there are career women who want to work 80 hour weeks, educated women who want to have a career but will scale back their hours when they have children, and those that would rather not work at all and have a man take care of them. likewise, there are kind/caring/responsible versions of all those, as well as crappy/selfish/mean-spirited versions of them. maybe she works 80 hour weeks because she's passionate about her job, but makes time and effort when she can for the people close to her. or maybe she works 80 hour weeks and is an egotistical, condescending bitch who doesn't care about anything but her own success. likewise, there are housewives who hire nannies and spend all day shopping and drinking with their friends, and housewives who put every bit of their energy and love into caring for their children, husband and community. there's a big difference between beliefs and character.

and i do kind of understand the bias in popular culture towards only insulting men. there's definitely a bit of a taboo about mocking women and people of other ethnicities. but at the end of the day, if Everybody Loves Raymond and commercials for home improvement stores are really causing problems in your life, you've got bigger issues than gender equality.
 
I'd pick up a mop for you, Lysis. ;)

No, buy seriously, I hear you and agree completely. If you're going to stay home, whether you're male or female, then you'll need to tend to those at-home responsibilities.
 
I dont mind feminism because its true that women have been and still are treated as lesser citizens than men in many ways. I think moving towards a more equal society is good and important.

I do however have issue with the mixing of both the old and new mentalities that some women seem to like to do. Dont have your man pay for everything and then turn around and refuse to do domestic stuff (that coin flips both ways if the woman is the breadwinner, guys).

Also, radical, vocal feminists do irritate me. I was taught from a kid to treat all people equally, and I do that to the best of my ability. Dont automatically assume that I am the bad guy and have been trying to keep you down your whole life just because I am a man.
 
I used to believe that what I hated was feminism, but it isn't, and I know that now. In fact, feminism is what allows me to wear tighter jeans and allows some good-looking girls I've known to take me out at their expense. I believe that feminism is, ultimately, a good thing, and I would go so far as to say that I myself am a feminist, as I truly do believe in gender equality.

I now know that what I hate is not feminism but something new that, admittedly, may have begun as an indirect result of feminism but is not the same thing. It's this: we're forgetting about our boys, especially in education. I'm not sure that public education has ever been conducive to young men, but it sure as hell isn't now, and I can tell you this based upon everything that I know to be true, based upon what I've read and what I've observed. I mean, boys tend to receive the vast majority of all disciplinary actions, and boys tend to receive the vast majority of all failing grades. Young women outnumber young men on college campuses sometimes 3 to 1. We're forgetting about our boys, and I have to say that it does frustrate me beyond belief.
 
I think OP is concerend about certain women who are using both the old rules of gender roles and the new rules of feminism to milk the best of both worlds. These are just selfish people that can't stand actually putting effort into something, being criticized, or not succeeding.

Also, I do hate it when I criticize a particular woman and she tries to hit back with "you are a woman hater etc." Just cause I criticize you, doesn't mean I'm saying anything about women in general.
 
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