I think she wants you to EARN sex with her, so she does not feel cheap when she has sex with you. It sounds like all you do when you are with her is try to hustle her back to someplace you can make out. As a young man, I did the same thing, and I was confused when the women seemed dissatisfied with that approach. I thought if they wanted me as much as I want them, they should be as on board with getting down as I was. So I decided they were to blame for being insincere in their feelings or otherwise suppressing their feelings and I grew resentful, which competed with my attraction for them and left me very confused and often unhappy or angst-ridden.
I eventually came to believe (but am not 100% sure even now) that there is a fundamental difference in men and women that accounts for this sort of thing. That women want to be wooed and won and swept away or they feel cheap.
Now, sometimes a woman may get off on feeling cheap, but in that state of mind, she also wants a certain type of guy, the bad boy, and she will be a cheap slut for him, maybe just to see how that feels, to try it on for size, to satisfy some fantasy she may have developed as she first came sexually awake and fantasized a lot about different types of sexual encounters. (This paragraph is a bit of a guess, so if it's not quite right, you can ignore it.)
But if you are trying to lay the nice, sensitive boyfriend type, trying to get her into bed with kindness and romantic words and the like, she is NOT going to be opening up her "cheap slut" fantasy box. Instead, she is opening up her "wooed princess" fantasy box. And if that's is the box she is opening, then you are going to have to fit into that box in order to get her where you want her. Which means you STOP making all your dates about getting physical, and you act like you are wooing a princess or whatever.
Alternatively, maybe you need to get a little more grit, dirt, or cheap tawdriness into your character so you can shfit her to a more down-and-dirty fantasy box.
For those who think this is misguided or sexist or something, it arises in part from a girl I was mad for in college, we seemed perfect for each other, she agreed to go out with me. I took her on moonlit walks, I said romantic things, I lit candles, we made out and i was pretty gentlemanly. Then she broke up with me saying, "I think your too nice for me. I need some one who will be more aggressive sexually."
I was like, "Dammit, I can do this, I did all this shit for you because that's the fucking shit society has told me I was SUPPOSED to do instead of acting like a sex-crazed beast! Now I get punished for it?!!!" Well, I did not say that, but I thought it as I pined for her afterwards.
I had years acting like an aggressive prick with women, pressuring them into sex early in relationships and stuff. Some of them later probably complained about men being such jerks like this, maybe about me being a jerk after we slept together early and then I broke up with them because they were not "the one." But the irony is that it is WOMEN who made me like this. I was all fluff and romance and sweetness and every time, some girl broke up with me because of it. shaped me into the very type of guy that women then love to complain about. I can point to other times I was dumped for being the nice guy, and showed me that was NOT what women wanted.
Well, eventually (hopefully) you mature past all that game-playing, like I did.
~psychoblast~
