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How tough were your parents on grades?

Cyc

Cyc

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Joined
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Canada
I guess this relates mostly to high school, but somewhat to post-secondary as well.

How tough were your parents about your report card? Speaking for myself, it really didn't matter. I only failed one course in high school and I don't think I was punished for it. Otherwise, I got mostly B's and C's, despite having the potential to ace my classes. I never did homework, didn't study. I just sort of coasted through and tried my best to get all of my work done in class.

I also didn't get any incentive for good grades. My parents never went to those parent-teacher meetings, and I think I took just about every opportunity to play euchre in the cafeteria, or play hackey sack outside and smoke cigarettes.

When I hit my early 20's, I woke up and decided I wanted to pursue further education. My options were severely limited at that point (due to grades) and I had to choose a vocational field. Again, I didn't get any encouragement (other than to move out) and no financial support.

After graduating College, I was able to move on to University and finally pursue my goals. It just took much, much longer than it had to. To this day, I still struggle with the workload at times, as I've had to build my discipline from scratch in my 20's.

I can't help but feeling a bit of resentment, having squandered my potential for so long. I wish I'd had more support. I wish I'd had something to fear that represented the future consequences of getting bad grades.

Anyways, what's your story?
 
My parents had semi high expectations of me, but they weren't completely unreasonable. I don't know if all A's and B's were their expectations all along, but by succeeding early in school I set the bar high and my parents expected me to live up to them throughout middle and high school, as well as college but they don't see my grades in college unless I choose to share them with em.
 
I'm an underacheiver.

When waiting tables, even last year at my last gig, people used to ask me if I was in school. I look younger than my years, and I've a youthful kind of personality that--superficially--does not reflect my true age.

I used to tell those curious patrons I was on hiatus, but I stopped saying that when I made it ten years down the road out of highschool. I haven't been to a post secondary class in about 14 years.

I regret not being more focused as a youth, as the classes were not difficult for me when I applied myself. I had difficulty doing the homework assigned me. I also had difficulty attending class on a regular.

Now I am quickly approaching middle age, and I'm making the same money that I made just out of highschool.

My parents were rarely home. They both worked hard, and my dad played hard after his 9 to 5. Mom thought I was on the five year plan, and she was always very negative. She decided I was a deadbeat early on, and you know what? I started not to give a fuck.

I am only now coming to terms with the poor choices I've made up until this point. Still I wouldn't change any of those years or any of the experiences that have made me the person I am today.

I will go back to further my education, and when that happens I will know what it is that I want out of the deal in the long run.
 
eh as long as no C's they leave me alone. My cumalitive GPA for high school is 3.8 (weighted) and they are pushing me to do better. My school is VERY academically focused (wealthy community of snooty people) so theres even more pressure. Im like in the bottom half of my 400 person class with that GPA:\
 
Noodle, that sounds a lot like me.

My father was an entrepreneur so he didn't have a lot of time to really worry about things like my grades. I started failing school in 3rd grade so to some degree I think he just got used to the bad grades. Report cards would go missing and it would be the whole year before he realized that he hadn't seen one. He would then tell my brother and I that we are not allowed to do this or that till he saw a report card. So we would get a transcript from the office as our report card somehow caught on fire and we would then fix the transcript with MSWord. We would have to make it believable but still good enough to be able to do what we wanted.

As you can probably tell my mom wasn't around for any of this and my step mom hated me.

I wish I could do school. I just can't learn like that. :(
 
I feel you. I know more than my formal education level would indicate. Even today, Mother is regulary surprised by my familiarity with a number of topics. Drugs especially, as she has been a nurse since the late sixties.

:D
 
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I think my parents gave up on me being a huge academic scholar after age 14. My grades didn't go downhill, but the pressure was off, until I got into my first semester of college. Then it was hell, so I dropped out.
 
Very.

Both of my parents have post-grad degrees, and wanted nothing less from their children. It started from an early age too - I was doing puzzle books, watching PBS and such instead of playing with the other kids after school. My mother was a bit nicer about it, but my father would rip my head off over an A-. It sucked, becuase I went to a rough school district, where being a smart kid meant torment.

In college, I was pretty much disconnected from them mostly, so they didn't really get to follow my GPA. No report cards in college :)

In grad school, I managed to pull a higher GPA that my father did, so that basically shut him up. My mother's come around a long way though, realising that she was letting my father control how hard she pushed me when I was young, and now cares about my happiness more than my success.
 
My parents don't really say anything at all but I usually do pretty well so theres no reason to complain. I do my homework in study hall and never really study for anything so I guess im one of those people that could do better but just slides by with A's and B's.

My grandparents give me a few bucks for every A though :)
 
My parents were fairly hard on me early on but only to the point of knowing my ability. I SUCKED HARD (and still do) at spelling in grade school so when I got my first and only C (until coming to law school :|) in spelling they weren't hard on me. They knew I worked as hard as I could but I was just slow in that subject. I remember being REALLY upset about the grade and them comforting me.

Anyway, they were hard on me early on but eased up when they began to trust that I would excel on my own. I know if I had started to slip up I'd get punished by grounding, chores and other things I enjoyed being taken away. My sister didn't seem to care about her grades and suffered for it with the consequences I outlined above. In college I always did well so I freely shared my grades with my parents who were always very proud.

I think my parents went about it the right way for me. They were always very complimentary when either my sister or I did well in school (and any other endeavor for that matter)... even on one test grade. We were seriously the 'lets sit around the table at dinner and talk about our days' kind of family. I feel very lucky for having such supportive parents growing up who understood the value in balance. I think it has been directly reflected in how I have been able to relatively succeed since getting out from under their wing so to speak.

I still tell them my grades, though I'm not as happy to share them as I was in undergrad. I'm not use to getting Bs and Cs. They're still very proud.

Cute memory: in 6th grade I was on a walk with my father when I slyly brought up the idea of me getting my own computer in my room. He made a deal with me that if I got all As and Bs through middle school I'd get one freshman year of high school. I did it and got addicted to bl shortly thereafter lol. ;)
 
My folks also both have pretty serious academic backgrounds. They rode me real hard, real early & it was a fucking mess. Bizarre preschools, montessori prekindergarten, & when public elementary school came I was so poorly adjusted & strung out on bullshit that I just flopped & exploded. There was about ten years of passionate fighting. Eventually I got a diploma from the state through weird means.

I stopped doing real schoolwork for about five years, until after a few years on my own I decided college was a very good idea & when I asked they said they'd be glad to help me. They're not on my case about grades now that I'm a proper adult (& now that they're stellar), but man they used to give me hell...

I failed two courses when I was in public school, just because I loathed it passionately. Didn't show up for tests, due dates, normal class meetings, damn near anything. The only reason I had to register as homeschool'd is because I was arrested for truancy, lol.

Can't complain, though. Their strategies worked well with their other children.
 
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