How Far Do You Bend?

[Jabberwocky]

If you are a casual or occasional user of serious drugs how often and how long does your typical bender go for? Are there any specific triggers that set you of? Are there are any special conditions required for you to stop?

I’ve had a few multi-years periods of almost daily use that most people would class as addiction or dependency in the past but my overall pattern of use is to just suddenly go hell for leather for a while until the very last minute required to meet some important real-world deadline or commitment. Up to about 5 years ago I had clear triggers like relationship issues, depression, and anxiety and it seemed to me (and my therapist) that drugs were self-medication. Now I feel pretty happy, calm, and generally at peace with myself and the world most of the time but every couple of weeks or months I’ll get to the end of a day and crave getting fucked up. It’s overpowering and not really for any particular drug: any decent psychedelic, MDMA or METH would be fine. I have no taste at all for opiates or alcohol.

I can literally feel 10/10 happy with life on a Tuesday morning, have a plan to knock off some work, be really keen to get back into a book I’m halfway through reading, and maybe take care of a bunch of errands - yet by 7 PM I’m driving 40 min to see my meth dealer, or lying on my bed unable to walk because of the amount of acid kicking in. Depending on the cash I have and what I get hold of I might be back at work by Thursday - but more often it’s Monday at the earliest.

Anyway usually the binge simply lasts until the drugs run out. I’m not really into heading out and scoring repeatedly. So if I bought a couple of points of meth or few MDMA pills or a couple of trips it might just last a weekend. But if I bought an half an ounce I could be at it for a couple of weeks. If there are drugs in my house, I will have them for breakfast, lunch, and dinner until they are all gone.

It’s rare that a binge causes me to become undone in the real world because I don’t have a regular 9-5 job and can pretty much control when and where I need to be productive. I also have only a few family responsibilities. I do think about trying to control my binging to n it intersect with time I spend city my kid. I hate myself for it but I sometimes simply moderate the dosage to be sufficiently functional for family things. No-one has questioned my behaviour for years because turning up and just being a bit weird is way more acceptable than cancelling at the last minute because you are incoherent or can’t drive.

 

[Nas47]

May be you can do all this because as you say you havent taste for oppies or alc.Being in regular job and binge altogether are often impossible.The uppers use or abuse is different than that of downers.Or compulsivness of substance..
.

 

[G_Chem]

Well these days I just don’t seem to have too many issues with the hard drugs, knock on wood. Cocaine is the only drug that can catch me by surprise even to this day so that’s the one I’ll talk about. That said opiates and cannabis are basically a need but I try to keep my daily doses low as possible, 1mg buprenorphine and one hitters of bud.

Back to cocaine.. Soon as I do a line if I have more in my possession or someone starts offering me more I have an extremely hard time stopping. Usually I’ll sniff a couple lines each night I’m not working the next day until it’s gone, nothing extreme like my old days but still can’t control it really. Every weekend the thought will creep back even though I’ll be fine all week working.

I always say Cocaines the only drug that can make you feel like a drug addict that first time you try it. You feel the desire to do “just one more” and rationalizing each additional one after.

This can last anywhere from a couple days to a couple months, until I either run out or have an experience (mdma, psychedelics) that kind of resets my brain and I’m good until the next time. The good thing is I only like quality cocaine so I’m not willing to waste money or my health on garbage, that saves me a bit too.

-GC

 

[nznity]

I was more of an allnighter type of guy, I think the max ive been awake has been 60 hrs or so and I felt like utter shit. Not for me.

 

[tubgirl.jpg]

Once I got on amphetamine daily and was at my worst, I'd knock off 2-4 days awake, sleep a day or two, and repeat.
It often ended up being 4 or 5 days speeding my tits off. I always had more amphetamine at home than I could ever use up, so I'd either start when the shadow people got obnoxious, or I'd feel my thoughts speeding into that erratic paranoid gear.
I kept that up for well over a year before something in my head snapped and I was running around down town chasing ghosts and screaming at the top of my lungs for people that weren't there.

Before that, I usually binged on LSD - that is, getting home from work at 3, dropping acid, tripping until 2-3, pop some benzos/GHB, sleep and work, or the occasional Vyvanse.
I also had this bad habit of showing up to work completely off my ass on morphine after a night of no sleep, and making coffee half asleep.

I've had some ketamine binges too, but those never lasted more than a night.


While I kind of miss the crazy speed days, mixing roofies and sulfate and making music or writing for 3 days, I don't miss the come downs and crashes and bouts of depression that inevitably followed.

 

[assclass]

i like cannabis edibles that get you high for a couple days

 

[Nas47]

Well these days I just don’t seem to have too many issues with the hard drugs, knock on wood. Cocaine is the only drug that can catch me by surprise even to this day so that’s the one I’ll talk about. That said opiates and cannabis are basically a need but I try to keep my daily doses low as possible, 1mg buprenorphine and one hitters of bud.

Back to cocaine.. Soon as I do a line if I have more in my possession or someone starts offering me more I have an extremely hard time stopping. Usually I’ll sniff a couple lines each night I’m not working the next day until it’s gone, nothing extreme like my old days but still can’t control it really. Every weekend the thought will creep back even though I’ll be fine all week working.

I always say Cocaines the only drug that can make you feel like a drug addict that first time you try it. You feel the desire to do “just one more” and rationalizing each additional one after.

This can last anywhere from a couple days to a couple months, until I either run out or have an experience (mdma, psychedelics) that kind of resets my brain and I’m good until the next time. The good thing is I only like quality cocaine so I’m not willing to waste money or my health on garbage, that saves me a bit too.

-GC

Yes,good coce is hard to ressist.much lesser load on your body and mind compare to meth.but still hardly addictive.If i in very limit quantities even can sleep well.

 

[Robi]

cant bend too far ( maybe i did), but used near every day after work for a year and hellah dangerous( fent) drug, but it actually made me not like alcohol or pot anymore strange enough, now looks like i get to get hooked on SSRI, gabap and xanax, fun fun( being so damn frugal with the xanax)