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Recovery How do you keep yourself accountable and keep moving forward?

Snafu in the Void

Moderator: NMI Bukowski Jr.
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I'm sure a lot of you can relate to the fucked up cycle I go through constantly.

Being my lazy, depressed, sad and desperate usual self. Suffering through it until enough is enough! I put my foot down. I change my routine, I get sober, I feel happy and motivated.

That lasts about a week or two, the motivation peters out and over the course of a day or two I'm right back at step 1 ^.

I seemingly do not understand how to turn motivation into habit. I mean, I understand that's what you need to do to grow and recover, I just don't understand HOW to do that. Discipline? Is it really that simple?

I told myself 10+ years ago I would NOT be in the same place back then.... and, well, I'm in the exact same place. A stunted maturity. I still feel and act like I'm in my early 20's and it's really starting to bother me (I'm 32).

What are some things you guys do to keep moving forward in life and not be stuck in the same place?
 
i honestly wish i had an answer!!

keeping it in the day does help you keep perspective, its easy to lose motivation when you imagine the rest of your life being as uncomfortable as it is at the time you're trying to change, which is usually what i do.

having other people to keep you accountable. do you live alone or do you have people around? having my boyfriend here, and my dad on my bank account so he can see if i go off the rails (makes me feel bad he has to but i know it keeps me in check, and i can trust him) both really help me.

discipline is important but a bit difficult to extricate from will power, which doesn't work. i can be very disciplined, when i've got a decent coding task i reckon i work at least 95% of the time i'm at my desk, when i have something boring or annoying it goes down to less than 50%. i find making myself start things can be the hardest bit, i run quite a lot and often don't actively want to til i'm out.

setting achievable goals helps too. even stupid ones. like i hate housework so i break it up, i will hoover the stairs then take a break, then hoover the landing and have another break. if i set out to hoover the whole house at once i'd never get going. if i feel super depressed just having a shower or brushing my teeth feels difficult, but if i make myself do it i feel better. does that make any sense at all?

but tbh i feel like a massive hypocrite suggesting anything when i'm totally failing at moving forward myself.
 
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