how did you slip into daily usage and did you know what it would do to your dopamine

[bbad]

I spent alot of time coming down thinking rather productive thoughts about my advantages over stopping compared to many of you that I really were concerned about. I really feel for people for people that use everyday. I have experienced it in small binges or even single days but really, the clip some of you make into daily use really scares me for you.

On the daily use:

I know many know about dopamine baselines and that meth use daily is going to just obliterate that dopamine store in you. My mission was clear from the start - "protect the dopamine baseline to protect the action of the drugs best effect". and i use this like a selfish reason that is easy to uphold - 3 weeks is good but we damage it still, its just when i see you guys slip into daily use i wonder if daily users knew about this need to protect your dopamine stores or if you were not aware of the dopmine protecting in the first place?


So to recap:

how did you slip to daily use?
were you aware of the dopamine being destroyed by heavy use?
did you have people that introduced you to daily use inform you of the damage that would be done?
were you completely unaware of the role of dopamine?

 

[Dorogos]

Not really relevant to the question but I buy a gram every two weeks and I use it up over the course of 48-72 hours it really frustrates me because that is not the plan! The plan is to get a gram divide it up into four doses (Iv) and have on shot every Friday night and play games for 15 hours straight. The first part of the plan goes to plan and I bang up 2.5 points it absuletly takes my breath and eye sight away and when I return to earth a proceed to play games. But then about 24 hours later around the same time the next night I take another 2.5 points and pretty much get the same result. So the next night after having already been awake for over 50 hours and clearly out of my mind I take another dose and this one is about half as good as the first two and shortly after that I take my last dose and this one does sweet fuck all. So now I have none left and I'm a strung out mess, it takes me a week to recover. I try to hold out for a month because that is how long my gear should have lasted if I stuck to plan. But I cave after two weeks (payday) and I get another gram and try again and fail pretty much exactly the same way. This has been going on like this for six months having never being able to stick to the plan. It's so frustrating because I'm completely wasting half a gram. You can't reason with ice... Maybe a time release safe (if there is such a thing) that pops open every Friday night so I can grab a dose quickly slam it shut?

 

[CfZrx]

I spent alot of time coming down thinking rather productive thoughts about my advantages over stopping compared to many of you that I really were concerned about. I really feel for people for people that use everyday. I have experienced it in small binges or even single days but really, the clip some of you make into daily use really scares me for you.

On the daily use:

I know many know about dopamine baselines and that meth use daily is going to just obliterate that dopamine store in you. My mission was clear from the start - "protect the dopamine baseline to protect the action of the drugs best effect". and i use this like a selfish reason that is easy to uphold - 3 weeks is good but we damage it still, its just when i see you guys slip into daily use i wonder if daily users knew about this need to protect your dopamine stores or if you were not aware of the dopmine protecting in the first place?


So to recap:

how did you slip to daily use?
were you aware of the dopamine being destroyed by heavy use?
did you have people that introduced you to daily use inform you of the damage that would be done?
were you completely unaware of the role of dopamine?

The damage to the dopamine system can be permanent too, right?

Not really relevant to the question but I buy a gram every two weeks and I use it up over the course of 48-72 hours it really frustrates me because that is not the plan! The plan is to get a gram divide it up into four doses (Iv) and have on shot every Friday night and play games for 15 hours straight. The first part of the plan goes to plan and I bang up 2.5 points it absuletly takes my breath and eye sight away and when I return to earth a proceed to play games. But then about 24 hours later around the same time the next night I take another 2.5 points and pretty much get the same result. So the next night after having already been awake for over 50 hours and clearly out of my mind I take another dose and this one is about half as good as the first two and shortly after that I take my last dose and this one does sweet fuck all. So now I have none left and I'm a strung out mess, it takes me a week to recover. I try to hold out for a month because that is how long my gear should have lasted if I stuck to plan. But I cave after two weeks (payday) and I get another gram and try again and fail pretty much exactly the same way. This has been going on like this for six months having never being able to stick to the plan. It's so frustrating because I'm completely wasting half a gram. You can't reason with ice... Maybe a time release safe (if there is such a thing) that pops open every Friday night so I can grab a dose quickly slam it shut?

Damn! And you're keeping your job through all that!?

 

[bbad]

The damage to the dopamine system can be permanent too, right?

Well we can see permanent damage in a general sense. I think its safe to assume that its permanent for safety reasons.

You have protect the baseline but yes there is still damage. You just take smaller sips less often but a month or two of heavy can wipe out nearly the lot. Its almost like "losing the magic" lesson of mdma users - you can love em, pop 15 pills a night every week and screw your brain up, but other people that love them will know what a reagent kit is before they even buy their first purchase.

But one point is that this drug has been around for a long time and it shows there has been neglect in using this drug to study effects on the brain. There has been some studies on monkeys and they found that some brains improved nearly 100% very fast and others not.

But for safety im not going to use daily because i once read a study that one monkey recovered. Assume permanent. Also dont hope for a cure in your lifetime.

Shows one thing is that cocaine and meth are drugs and i hope that one day that when research is really taken on that the legacy that comes of this study is new discoveries into things parkinson's disease, restless legs sydrome. The dopamine system is a mystery today and I think not very well funded. I'd hope that illicit drugs provide discoveries and cures for other conditions in the dopamine, seratonin system.

Probably governments should should get their stash of drugs and stop treating it as a illicit drug in a secret labratory and think of it as a "substance for research" they'd study for brain research. They might be spending more time looking for problems for illicits than solutions too.

daily users - though. no stress. assume the damage is perment and protect yourself. dont keep getting high daily if you can.

 

[bbad]

Not really relevant to the question but I buy a gram every two weeks and I use it up over the course of 48-72 hours it really frustrates me because that is not the plan! The plan is to get a gram divide it up into four doses (Iv) and have on shot every Friday night and play games for 15 hours straight. The first part of the plan goes to plan and I bang up 2.5 points it absuletly takes my breath and eye sight away and when I return to earth a proceed to play games. But then about 24 hours later around the same time the next night I take another 2.5 points and pretty much get the same result. So the next night after having already been awake for over 50 hours and clearly out of my mind I take another dose and this one is about half as good as the first two and shortly after that I take my last dose and this one does sweet fuck all. So now I have none left and I'm a strung out mess, it takes me a week to recover. I try to hold out for a month because that is how long my gear should have lasted if I stuck to plan. But I cave after two weeks (payday) and I get another gram and try again and fail pretty much exactly the same way. This has been going on like this for six months having never being able to stick to the plan. It's so frustrating because I'm completely wasting half a gram. You can't reason with ice... Maybe a time release safe (if there is such a thing) that pops open every Friday night so I can grab a dose quickly slam it shut?

At teh begining i tried to save and moderate and tried time locked safes and everything. I learned how to pick safe locks in seconds and even did massive meth inspired rants to the time lock safe makers telling them over 4 pages worth of study into their device.

No time locked locked safe can stop me from getting it out. Im lucky i only get 500mg every 3 weeks and the way i get it i dont meet people.

Ive got no ability to moderate, self control etc when the bag is in my hands. No power there and im lucky i dont have to struggle there. If i found a kilo id chuck it away after 3 nights to save my soul. I have no ability to make it or sell it either because i have no moderation, willpower and self control... when quizzed by my doctor if i save some it was great to tell "there is no force in the universe that could prevent me from using it when it is in my possseion" and loved how cased closed it was. Ive mentioned selfishness and protecting the baseline but theres other protection methods such as "nobody in this universe can put this drug in my hands" and also a source method i cant speak about but has really saved my ass.

You might want to look at a way of finding where moderation willpower and self control exists in your current situation and try and find a way that you can get the right amount for the right time without the rest. People with access that can provide you will be a problem. Find where you alone can control the right time. Obvious making it yourself will not work its a pathway to destruction. There is a way.

 

[bbad]

Also for other readers in my initial post i did write alot of stuff moderation, willpower and self control but it felt like it was connected. I took it off and it didnt offer what i am about to say:

apologies - choosing selfishness instead of moderation, willpower and self control and thinking of myself as a dopamine baseline protector wouldnt work if i had the drug of my possession. I've got maybe ten strategies. But i am not smart! I am lucky. I have little friends and the few i do wont tough this drug. Even that saved me. I am very lucky to so many advantages.

social accessibility is the real problem. None of my luck would work if i had chosen to have a meth buddy.

So the reason i dont have to use moderation, willpower and self control is because i started my steps the right way and they dont play any role, but when they do - such as when i get the bag - i start RIGHT AWAY. also, No offence intended but i wont attend rehab because other people are considered too threatening for my existence. In real life i can risk a person that ever used.


So as users yourselves you can maybe look at how you alone access this drug and its social accessibility is the biggest demon. Moderation, willpower and self control have a use in getting away from the scene when quitting - as in leave town and chuck your phone.

In daily use to escape my thoughts would be to get the fuck out of town to a rehab center and then get clean and then ggo somewhere else. But i just realized my source is gonna cause me a problem when i quit in some way and in my preparation to quit thankfully i have some real shit to work on.


i must apologize on the original post. That didn't help you to hear that selfishness works for me until you know all elements that happen. In your social accessibility environments most of my advice is worthless when you are already on a daily use. I would be using daily in your situations. All of you.

My new advice is to tell ya loved ones your gotta clean up, throw away the phone and leave town and travel far away and at least at the start- using rehab get clean, find somewhere safe you cant see a scene and then you wont have a problem with moderation, willpower and self control under the types of intensity you are under no. It will be much easier.

Im coming right off the tail end of a comedown and fuck i got alot of this because my moderation, willpower, self control meth rants of of the past in my psychosis have led me to try and give what i learned about those things but if you cant get the whole picture its impossible. closest alternative is the removal of social accessibility.

In the past i spoke about a few things about moderation, willpower and self control on sites and got no responses and i can see how it must have been patronizing. Social accessibility seems to me much greater problem to remove to even get to the stage looking for the rest.

My intentions were always to help daily users escape by using my M,W,SC tactics but i write this stuff when on meth and that's another example responsibility and consequences of using this drug.

 

[Mazzy in Europe]

Many years ago, (before rehab), I started dabbling in stimulants. Initially it was a weekend treat, but my life was going through a bad patch and I very gradually, almost imperceptibly crept up my usage over a period of a year until I was using all kinds of stimulants on a daily basis. I did this for about 4 months. It is basically an unsustainable habit - tolerance sets in fast, dosages need to be increased, eventually by an enormous factor, and then the side effects escalate. Psychosis often presents itself before you notice the effects of dopamine depletion. That's what happened to me at least.

For some time afterwards, I had no energy or motivation, even the most basic tasks such as personal hygiene felt like horrible chores that required enormous effort. I was anhedonic and found little pleasure in anything.

With a good diet, supplements, excercise and medication I made a complete recovery. What surprised me was how quickly I recovered.

I don't think permanent damage to the dopamine system is inevitable after heavy stim abuse, the brain is a very adaptive organ by nature of it's neuroplasticity, it can heal a massive amount of damage.

Maybe I was lucky.