Mental Health Hopelessness

[LSDMDMA&AMP]

I feel so hopeless. It seems like no matter what I do, things never change, things never get any better. I dont get any support from anyone, I dont have anything to offer anyone, and I will be completely alone in life for eternity.
It doesnt matter what I do, i cannot escape my situation. I do the best i can but i cant afford to get a car or have any hobbies, and even if I had hobbies, id have no way of getting out and doing anything. I dont know what to do. Nobody cares, nobody ever has. I am tired of life. Things never brighten for me, its always the same, watching the world pass me by, watching everyone else live life and have fun, while I am stuck alone on the sidelines, unable to have any fun or do anything, with people holding me back. I need help but I never get it. My parents tell me I need medication, but I dont want to go on medication if nothing else is going to change, because I need change, not pills. I dont know how much longer I can go. I have nobody I can talk to, nobody who cares, nobody who would ever do anything to help me. I am a failure, Ive got nothing to offer anyone, Im not worthy of being treated with kindness evidently. Noone will ever want anything to do with me. I try to find happiness but I never get it. Theres no way out. Im trapped. Noone wants to see me get better because noone cares. It isnt difficult to see whats wrong with my life yet those around me act as if nothing is wrong or missing from my life. Its as if I am just supposed to be alone, noone thinks anything of it even though they know I am hurt. I have noone. I will never have anyone. I wont ever get to know what its like to be happy, successful, independent, loved, cared about. It hurts every day to see normal people and everything that happens in their lives knowing that I wont ever get to experience that. No matter what I do, at the end of the day, theres noone I can turn to, noone who cares, noone who I can ever make happy or offer anything to, noone to ever love me. I am just supposed to live without and act like everything is OK and I cant do it anymore. I am tired of life. I never get to feel happy or have fun.

 

[GolemGolem]

Wow, you're really, really depressed. That sucks. I'm a failure too, but I'm on an upswing and feel like trying to help..
Prolly can't feel it to be true right now, but you are better than your depression will let you think. You have resources your depression won't let you call on. Things are shit right now, things have mostly been shit, but you want the right thing Change. Don't know what it'll take to break your depression, or even if it can be broke, but a counselor or maybe a preist, I don't know.
Things can get better though. You're just gonna have a hell of a time seeing that until your depression lifts a bit.
Stay alive.

 

[Mysterie]

there was a thread a few years ago in TDS about building self-confidence. i have never forgotten it because there were a lot of insightful perspectives that helped me gain a better understanding of building self-confidence/self-esteem, and it was something that i felt i lacked and still do to a lesser extent.

http://www.bluelight.org/vb/threads/648657-Where-do-You-Find-Self-Confidence?

i think its worth reading through and see what resonates, sometimes it takes a sprinkle of inspiration to start building momentum again and see things in a different light. having ups and downs is a part of being alive, but dwelling at the bottom and believing thats all that life has to offer is misguided imo.

 

[Londonscouser]

im a failure as well...also im never happy or am able to have fun...
It's a sad sad life to live =[.......dont give up....try ANYTHING and EVERYTHING to make it better

how old are you ?