LolImSquidward
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jul 5, 2024
- Messages
- 3
Hey everyone!
Since I apperently already made an account here (can't even remeber doing it) and plan to be more active here, I just wanted to introduce myself.
I'm a German girl in her mid-twenties and, although I am not new to drugs, I still feel like a Noob because I haven't tried that much yet.
Of course, since I am German, my first drug was Alcohol - I liked it, but only when I didn't have any other drugs to compare it too, and pretty much only drank when I went out with friends in my teenage years. Now, I rarely drink Alcohol because I don't like the effects and being drunk isn't worth the damage it does to my body.
The next drug I took was Ritalin - I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was a child and got prescribed Ritalin then, but because I was a very skinny child even before taking Ritalin and Ritalin suppressed my appetite even more, my parents decided to taper me off when I was 12 years old because I became underweight.
I decided to look for a new doctor when I was 18 and moved out into my own apartment. I felt completely overwhelmed and thought Ritalin would help me, which wasn't the case, because I abused it pretty heavily for about 2 years until my doctor found out and basically kicked me out.
After not taking Ritalin for a year, I looked for a new doctor that would prescribe me Ritalin and I am now able to control my use. I am still not taking it as I should, but I can take them in a way so that I don't run out of my script that should last me 3 months in 2 weeks.
A few years ago, I discovered Weed and loved it. I don't know if its because of my ADHD, but I really enjoy Weed. I don't even know what I am smoking - even though Weed got legalized in Germany this year, due to stupid bureaucracy, you cannot even buy it legally so you still need to buy it from dealers. Since I live in a small town and do not have many contacts, I just buy the Weed the dude I know sells. So I don't know if it's Indika or Sativa or something else, but I enjoy it, it's actually how I imagined being drunk feels like as a child.
There were phases where I smoked a lot more, but now I try to smoke one gramm a day. I know, smoking daily is still something a lot of people consider smoking a lot, but it works for me - I always smoke one joint at the end of the night when I have done everything I need to do. And when I say anything, I mean anynthing. I packed my lunch and breakfast for the next day, did the dishes, cleaned up, showered myself and did my skincare. Only when I did all of these things, I allow myself to smoke a joint. This way, I have something at the end of the day to look forward to and something that motivates me when I procrastinate (because the sooner I get my chores done, the sooner I get to smoke my nightly Joint), but I also make sure I do everything I need to do to be a "responsible adult" and my consume dosen't get out of control. Because if I'd allow myself to smoke as much as I'd like, I'd be broke in a week.
And now, and that is the reason I am planning to be more active on here, I've dipped my toes into the world of Research Chemicals. It all started when Reddit suggested a subreddit about Research Chemicals. One thing led to another and I was ordering some 4f-mph, which acts like Ritalin but is 3 times stronger. I really really loved it and it came just at the right time - I started a new job, moved back into my apartment (before I started this new job, I wasn't working and moved into my parents to save money), and wanted to lose some weight. 4f-mph helped with all of that - I was attentive at work, when I came home I still had enough energy to pack my breakfast and lunch for the next day and clean up a bit, and it helped me to lose weight.
But of course, nothing good can last forever, and after a few months of this, it was made illegal in Europe and the vendors only sell their remaining stock. While I will stock up on it, it is time to look for something new - which is what led me to this place that I heard a lot about from the videos of a certain british Youtuber.
So, after this introduction that turned out longer than I wanted it to be, you know maybe know why I still consider myself a Noob when it comes to drugs - if you count the medication I abused as a drug, I have only taken 4 drugs in my life so far.
But, as much as I want to try new things, I am very cautious - maybe it is my ADHD and my unbalanced brain chemistry, but I noticed that I have a hard time controlling myself if I like a substance. I already notice this with weed - when I do boring tasks where I don't need to be focused like taking a walk to reach my goal of 10.000 steps a day, there is always a voice in the back of my head telling me how much more fun this would be when I'd smoke a joint.
I can't imagine how hard it would be to control my use of drugs that make you actually physically dependent or that have a stronger addiction than Weed.
But yeah, that's me, or at least that's the parts of me I feel comfortable sharing with strangers on the Internet. Hope I didn't make any grammatical errors or spelling errors that make this hard to read - even though I have learned English as a second language for over 10 years now and consume a lot of content in English, it's still not my native language.
Since I apperently already made an account here (can't even remeber doing it) and plan to be more active here, I just wanted to introduce myself.
I'm a German girl in her mid-twenties and, although I am not new to drugs, I still feel like a Noob because I haven't tried that much yet.
Of course, since I am German, my first drug was Alcohol - I liked it, but only when I didn't have any other drugs to compare it too, and pretty much only drank when I went out with friends in my teenage years. Now, I rarely drink Alcohol because I don't like the effects and being drunk isn't worth the damage it does to my body.
The next drug I took was Ritalin - I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was a child and got prescribed Ritalin then, but because I was a very skinny child even before taking Ritalin and Ritalin suppressed my appetite even more, my parents decided to taper me off when I was 12 years old because I became underweight.
I decided to look for a new doctor when I was 18 and moved out into my own apartment. I felt completely overwhelmed and thought Ritalin would help me, which wasn't the case, because I abused it pretty heavily for about 2 years until my doctor found out and basically kicked me out.
After not taking Ritalin for a year, I looked for a new doctor that would prescribe me Ritalin and I am now able to control my use. I am still not taking it as I should, but I can take them in a way so that I don't run out of my script that should last me 3 months in 2 weeks.
A few years ago, I discovered Weed and loved it. I don't know if its because of my ADHD, but I really enjoy Weed. I don't even know what I am smoking - even though Weed got legalized in Germany this year, due to stupid bureaucracy, you cannot even buy it legally so you still need to buy it from dealers. Since I live in a small town and do not have many contacts, I just buy the Weed the dude I know sells. So I don't know if it's Indika or Sativa or something else, but I enjoy it, it's actually how I imagined being drunk feels like as a child.
There were phases where I smoked a lot more, but now I try to smoke one gramm a day. I know, smoking daily is still something a lot of people consider smoking a lot, but it works for me - I always smoke one joint at the end of the night when I have done everything I need to do. And when I say anything, I mean anynthing. I packed my lunch and breakfast for the next day, did the dishes, cleaned up, showered myself and did my skincare. Only when I did all of these things, I allow myself to smoke a joint. This way, I have something at the end of the day to look forward to and something that motivates me when I procrastinate (because the sooner I get my chores done, the sooner I get to smoke my nightly Joint), but I also make sure I do everything I need to do to be a "responsible adult" and my consume dosen't get out of control. Because if I'd allow myself to smoke as much as I'd like, I'd be broke in a week.
And now, and that is the reason I am planning to be more active on here, I've dipped my toes into the world of Research Chemicals. It all started when Reddit suggested a subreddit about Research Chemicals. One thing led to another and I was ordering some 4f-mph, which acts like Ritalin but is 3 times stronger. I really really loved it and it came just at the right time - I started a new job, moved back into my apartment (before I started this new job, I wasn't working and moved into my parents to save money), and wanted to lose some weight. 4f-mph helped with all of that - I was attentive at work, when I came home I still had enough energy to pack my breakfast and lunch for the next day and clean up a bit, and it helped me to lose weight.
But of course, nothing good can last forever, and after a few months of this, it was made illegal in Europe and the vendors only sell their remaining stock. While I will stock up on it, it is time to look for something new - which is what led me to this place that I heard a lot about from the videos of a certain british Youtuber.
So, after this introduction that turned out longer than I wanted it to be, you know maybe know why I still consider myself a Noob when it comes to drugs - if you count the medication I abused as a drug, I have only taken 4 drugs in my life so far.
But, as much as I want to try new things, I am very cautious - maybe it is my ADHD and my unbalanced brain chemistry, but I noticed that I have a hard time controlling myself if I like a substance. I already notice this with weed - when I do boring tasks where I don't need to be focused like taking a walk to reach my goal of 10.000 steps a day, there is always a voice in the back of my head telling me how much more fun this would be when I'd smoke a joint.
I can't imagine how hard it would be to control my use of drugs that make you actually physically dependent or that have a stronger addiction than Weed.
But yeah, that's me, or at least that's the parts of me I feel comfortable sharing with strangers on the Internet. Hope I didn't make any grammatical errors or spelling errors that make this hard to read - even though I have learned English as a second language for over 10 years now and consume a lot of content in English, it's still not my native language.
