So, I was damn stupid enough to try some H again but in my defense i was on Kratom at the time.
I recently had some good Kratom extract and when it ran out there was only one solution to the problem.
This is more a report on the hellish withdrawals, which need to be mentioned as a formal complaint and warning to others, and not the drug experience itself. I have already posted a detailed H experience report.
So I got a G of H. I understand its usually sold in smaller quantities. Not here though, just like with meth. The dealers must assume their customers are superhuman or possess some powerful form of self control and decent common sense.
Anyways so last week i went two days on Kratom and it ran out on Friday and then got the H. Not a good start as im sure Kratom use contributes to the "consecutive days on an opiate = doom" risk factor in some way as 3 days on h last time wasnt this bad.
So I got the H. It was brownish powder and looked pretty good as powders go. It was this incredibly fine powder and perfectly consistent in color and format. It looked like something from a top secret lab. Good times ahead for sure i thought. The powder was so fine it was difficult to snort without sending it all down your throat, but I made it work.
Previously I have only seen another brownish powder from the same guy but inconsistent and thinkr and then some wettish fudge type substance from other guy.
Strangely they all seemed to work just as well, at least as far as my virgin receptors could tell anyways.
Anyways, the G kept me high for like 3 days straight day and night.
It was decent but i am still disappointed in the awake stage Euphoria but i may not be used to it yet and also stims are more my experience. Not saying it sucks t all, it just doesnt meet the high expectations you hear about and also expected it to be far better then strong Kratom.
The experience, besides the nod, is still pretty damn close to good Kratom extracts but the big difference is no nod with Kratom, no matter how much I take and sick i get. A damn shame.
And I also made sure to dose properly to ensure a proper test and experience and nodded balls to prove i wasnt somehow taking pitiful doses.
Now the nod is just damn great. The dream state of floating through peaceful scenes of happiness and rainbows has its appeal. Initially I had to get used to the constant drowsiness which annoyed me since i usually do stims and thus i do lots of shit when high.
Additionally I get those annoying Myoclonic twitches, leg jerks, all the damn time especially when trying to nod off. I was annoyed since it doesn't really seem to fit with the ideal experience you have in your mind but realized it didn't really disrupt anything so I accepted this side effect and all was well. Turns out your leg can go batshit if it wants but the nod pays no heed. I did get some concern about having a seizure while "asleep" but i just said i was running in my dream.
There was one time however that I jerked so hard i threw my laptop across the room and kicked over speakers and other shit and hit my head on something, but not sure what since nothing was there. That was quite jarring but i accepted it as well since for some reason I seemed to be in rather relaxed forgiving state at the time.
I would be interested in how common these jerks are for others. I don't hear about it much at all.
Anyways, only like day 3 did i get comfortable with the nod and accepted the leg activities as a simple welcome physical configuration the angels must initiate as a away to allow stability on the fluffy clouds that transport me through the magical land of dreams.
It surprises me that i never once heard details about the opiate nod as a dream like state. Nobody mentions it. I just assumed it was some comatose or extremely relaxed state. I wonder why this major appeal factor is so unknown. Adding this critical detail to the marketing efforts would certinally generate a ton more customers.
Seriously, who hasn't at one point wish there was drug that made your dream (to put it simply, its actually far more complicated and strange in many unexplained ways) nice things on demand.
The lucid dreaming crowd would all be addicts if they found out.
Anyways, i found the exact same issue with meth. All the best qualities about these drugs are not commonly known or available to newbs who need the info. Probably for the best though.
So on to the hellish days to follow. I really thought it would be similar in hardcoreness, risk factors, side effects, addiction then meth, obviously in different ways. Meth seems to be the other big bad guy next to opiates. Well i found meth a rather tame kitten in comparison. Them tweakers got it easy.
The opiate god certinally takes great joy in punishing those who don't pay the proper respects.
The withdrawals where also not the proper ones, like with the ideal good proper addicts withdrawing while handcuffed to the bed in american movies. At least mine weren't like I witnessed with the thrashing and sweating, howls of torment and prayers for swift death.
For now i am assuming the above is accurate until i am told otherwise.
Mine was i think a milder version you get as an infrequent user who got high for to many consecutive days. Less like to the extreme agony and notable physical response and more like a less extreme but consistently hellish combination of every possible annoyance, discomfort, illness and negative mental state thats possible to combine without any wasted overlap in effects. Efficiently designed evil.
Its just ridiculous. The shit that happens doesn't even make sense, its just retarded, clearly designed to piss you off, its obvious overkill and clearly not a natural state but assuredly by design via some sick twisted demon sadist who doesn't even try to hide his evil works as a natural side effect of drug use.
I will try to list everything, its really the little things though that sends it zooming across the line of reason and sanity. Some of the seemingly wacky things are real and very apparent and not some perceived annoyance, i assure you. I also got them all to a lesser degree last time so they are consistent.
1. Depressed as shit, hate other people and life, act like a possessed sulking dick child, nearby family becomes ideal targets for hate. Bleh, expected i guess. No anxiety though. A small mercy.
2. All other possible negative mental states not covered above, to numerous to bother listing. Anger, sadness, no care for work or responsibilities, child like behavior and a deep passionate hate for other humans who are obviously be to blame for this dreadful situation. Nearby animals and breakable objects are also targets for hate or blame and regular fits of desperate pleading for mercy and relief.
I think I even threw and broke my favorite coffee mug after a brief tear filled session about why it hates me so much. And now of course I can never take back those words either.
3. A fever as with flu except worse in unexplainable ways.
4. My throat was fooked as was my entire pipe thing that the food goes down. It hurt to swallow but in a really weird way in that i have no idea what was going on there since its not like other sore throats.
Its like it was swollen and would spasm at the touch of food or liquid. This was worse then the description makes it sound. This was also annoying and stupid and doesn't make sense. Why would my throat be effected. I raged at this for a long time.
5. My mouth was fooked as well in another odd way. It would burn like mad when adding any food or liquid as if there where peppers or something hot as fuck in it.
Very odd and also had me raging at whoever made food and was putting shit in all the drinks till i realized it was my own treasonous mouth to blame.
This is also just plan crazy. I cant even fathom the functionality that this can actually occur in reality. How does your mouth burn like fire with contact to food. There where no sores or any noticeable wound or whatever. And this also was not some minor thing, this was proper bad as fuck and not some perceived thing due to mental hatefulness.
Touching the inside didnt hurt either which didnt help much unless i could eat human fingers. Its like its mocking you with its effects.
6. Everything eaten tasted like shit as well. Not literally, that would still be a better option. It was more like the taste, goodness, joy and happiness was stripped away from the food so that it tasted like you where eating or swallowing despair seasoned with anguish manifested as an actual taste.
Additionally the previously mentioned throat issue seems to work along with this issue to make things extra worse in that when you swallow the mouth full of suffering, your throat, along with the usual spasm and pain, then somehow seems to add an additional element of taste hate to your swallowed food.
It feels like your throat excretes some vile taste on your swallowed food making it taste even worse as it goes down.
Yes this doesn't make sense but somehow my food pipe made sure to let me know that it was now despair soaked in some other vile demon piss type substance as it slowly and painfully passed down to my stomach, and it seemed like i could perceive the taste like maybe how you taste bile with stomach issues sometimes.
Possibly some mental effect, but obvious as fuck and intentionally cruel. There is a pattern in issues in the mouth area. I just dont see why. Its not like you eat the Heroin. My nose was fine but admittedly i didn't out any food in it and
I think the intent here is to make the whole process of taking in sustenance as difficult as possible for some reason that i cannot seem to fathom. I was surprised that the rest of the path the food follows does not take part in adding to your suffering in some way. So it was possible to at least eat and drink enough to survive and not suffer to much until it comes out. I made sure not to sneak a peak at what digested despair looks like. You cant unsee things.
5. Besides the scars and wounds from scratching myself fucked on the drug, all my skin was also painful and irritated during the withdrawals. Like nothing you could compare to. Basically like your skin is reporting to you that its pissed off, unhappy, irritated with no clear cause and that you are to blame and then your mind makes up some physical sensation to explain this after.
And it wasn't the wounds or scratches. The scratching wounds where a blessing in fact since there was no skin capable of adding more to the clamor of annoyed complaining flooding my perceptions.
But ok, skin irritation is acceptable and could be a reasonable symptom. I approve of it, but the mouth shit is just not right. Somebody is having a laugh.
6. Other things are harder to explain. Things where just not right. Everything was wrong physically, but more so because it says its wrong and unhappy and doesn't really clarify why.
It was like i was transplanted into some other sickly persons body and the immune system could sense me as a foreign body and was constantly giving me shit and loudly complaining about everything to get me to bugger off.
There where other things im sure have been blocked out due to shock and other things not worth mentioning like pissing fire and shitting bricks shaped like medieval weapons. The usual stuff, at least on terms of being able to explain them as something possible in current reality and likely a normal effect.
Anyways, some items sound odd or exaggerated but they where traumatic and real and not embellished. Feeling sick and shit is fine, you grit your teeth and get through it. Even some mental shit like anxiety and depression is to be expected.
But this experience seems designed to frustrate and enrage and make you curse the gods for the unnecessary unfairness of it all. It sucks out every possible joy or comfort while it lasts. I think because many of the effects feel unnatural and have not been experienced before at all and cant be explained with current levels of human understanding.
And respect to those who do real withdrawals. That must be something else i do not wish to contemplate.
So does any of this sound familiar or is this an experience designed uniquely per individual for max pain
If so i need to investigate why eating was chosen as my punishment. Hmmm
Also are there two different withdrawal levels or is this like the main one but less hardcore. Do i get experience credit, bragging rights?
Anyways, lesson learnt. Don't mix or use Kratom near your H use as it obviously adds to the withdrawals due to some impurity or poisonous cut nightshade. Beware cheap imitations and rather stick to good old tried and true Heroin, it is used and loved by millions. They cant all be wrong after all.
Anyways on the up side i soon after tried some PST for the first time and it actually worked decently, but with 1.5kg seeds, bleh but still cheap. I was careful though and also had no feelings about wanting to die after one day use.
I guess we humans never learn.
I recently had some good Kratom extract and when it ran out there was only one solution to the problem.
This is more a report on the hellish withdrawals, which need to be mentioned as a formal complaint and warning to others, and not the drug experience itself. I have already posted a detailed H experience report.
So I got a G of H. I understand its usually sold in smaller quantities. Not here though, just like with meth. The dealers must assume their customers are superhuman or possess some powerful form of self control and decent common sense.
Anyways so last week i went two days on Kratom and it ran out on Friday and then got the H. Not a good start as im sure Kratom use contributes to the "consecutive days on an opiate = doom" risk factor in some way as 3 days on h last time wasnt this bad.
So I got the H. It was brownish powder and looked pretty good as powders go. It was this incredibly fine powder and perfectly consistent in color and format. It looked like something from a top secret lab. Good times ahead for sure i thought. The powder was so fine it was difficult to snort without sending it all down your throat, but I made it work.
Previously I have only seen another brownish powder from the same guy but inconsistent and thinkr and then some wettish fudge type substance from other guy.
Strangely they all seemed to work just as well, at least as far as my virgin receptors could tell anyways.
Anyways, the G kept me high for like 3 days straight day and night.
It was decent but i am still disappointed in the awake stage Euphoria but i may not be used to it yet and also stims are more my experience. Not saying it sucks t all, it just doesnt meet the high expectations you hear about and also expected it to be far better then strong Kratom.
The experience, besides the nod, is still pretty damn close to good Kratom extracts but the big difference is no nod with Kratom, no matter how much I take and sick i get. A damn shame.
And I also made sure to dose properly to ensure a proper test and experience and nodded balls to prove i wasnt somehow taking pitiful doses.
Now the nod is just damn great. The dream state of floating through peaceful scenes of happiness and rainbows has its appeal. Initially I had to get used to the constant drowsiness which annoyed me since i usually do stims and thus i do lots of shit when high.
Additionally I get those annoying Myoclonic twitches, leg jerks, all the damn time especially when trying to nod off. I was annoyed since it doesn't really seem to fit with the ideal experience you have in your mind but realized it didn't really disrupt anything so I accepted this side effect and all was well. Turns out your leg can go batshit if it wants but the nod pays no heed. I did get some concern about having a seizure while "asleep" but i just said i was running in my dream.
There was one time however that I jerked so hard i threw my laptop across the room and kicked over speakers and other shit and hit my head on something, but not sure what since nothing was there. That was quite jarring but i accepted it as well since for some reason I seemed to be in rather relaxed forgiving state at the time.
I would be interested in how common these jerks are for others. I don't hear about it much at all.
Anyways, only like day 3 did i get comfortable with the nod and accepted the leg activities as a simple welcome physical configuration the angels must initiate as a away to allow stability on the fluffy clouds that transport me through the magical land of dreams.
It surprises me that i never once heard details about the opiate nod as a dream like state. Nobody mentions it. I just assumed it was some comatose or extremely relaxed state. I wonder why this major appeal factor is so unknown. Adding this critical detail to the marketing efforts would certinally generate a ton more customers.
Seriously, who hasn't at one point wish there was drug that made your dream (to put it simply, its actually far more complicated and strange in many unexplained ways) nice things on demand.
The lucid dreaming crowd would all be addicts if they found out.
Anyways, i found the exact same issue with meth. All the best qualities about these drugs are not commonly known or available to newbs who need the info. Probably for the best though.
So on to the hellish days to follow. I really thought it would be similar in hardcoreness, risk factors, side effects, addiction then meth, obviously in different ways. Meth seems to be the other big bad guy next to opiates. Well i found meth a rather tame kitten in comparison. Them tweakers got it easy.
The opiate god certinally takes great joy in punishing those who don't pay the proper respects.
The withdrawals where also not the proper ones, like with the ideal good proper addicts withdrawing while handcuffed to the bed in american movies. At least mine weren't like I witnessed with the thrashing and sweating, howls of torment and prayers for swift death.
For now i am assuming the above is accurate until i am told otherwise.
Mine was i think a milder version you get as an infrequent user who got high for to many consecutive days. Less like to the extreme agony and notable physical response and more like a less extreme but consistently hellish combination of every possible annoyance, discomfort, illness and negative mental state thats possible to combine without any wasted overlap in effects. Efficiently designed evil.
Its just ridiculous. The shit that happens doesn't even make sense, its just retarded, clearly designed to piss you off, its obvious overkill and clearly not a natural state but assuredly by design via some sick twisted demon sadist who doesn't even try to hide his evil works as a natural side effect of drug use.
I will try to list everything, its really the little things though that sends it zooming across the line of reason and sanity. Some of the seemingly wacky things are real and very apparent and not some perceived annoyance, i assure you. I also got them all to a lesser degree last time so they are consistent.
1. Depressed as shit, hate other people and life, act like a possessed sulking dick child, nearby family becomes ideal targets for hate. Bleh, expected i guess. No anxiety though. A small mercy.
2. All other possible negative mental states not covered above, to numerous to bother listing. Anger, sadness, no care for work or responsibilities, child like behavior and a deep passionate hate for other humans who are obviously be to blame for this dreadful situation. Nearby animals and breakable objects are also targets for hate or blame and regular fits of desperate pleading for mercy and relief.
I think I even threw and broke my favorite coffee mug after a brief tear filled session about why it hates me so much. And now of course I can never take back those words either.
3. A fever as with flu except worse in unexplainable ways.
4. My throat was fooked as was my entire pipe thing that the food goes down. It hurt to swallow but in a really weird way in that i have no idea what was going on there since its not like other sore throats.
Its like it was swollen and would spasm at the touch of food or liquid. This was worse then the description makes it sound. This was also annoying and stupid and doesn't make sense. Why would my throat be effected. I raged at this for a long time.
5. My mouth was fooked as well in another odd way. It would burn like mad when adding any food or liquid as if there where peppers or something hot as fuck in it.
Very odd and also had me raging at whoever made food and was putting shit in all the drinks till i realized it was my own treasonous mouth to blame.
This is also just plan crazy. I cant even fathom the functionality that this can actually occur in reality. How does your mouth burn like fire with contact to food. There where no sores or any noticeable wound or whatever. And this also was not some minor thing, this was proper bad as fuck and not some perceived thing due to mental hatefulness.
Touching the inside didnt hurt either which didnt help much unless i could eat human fingers. Its like its mocking you with its effects.
6. Everything eaten tasted like shit as well. Not literally, that would still be a better option. It was more like the taste, goodness, joy and happiness was stripped away from the food so that it tasted like you where eating or swallowing despair seasoned with anguish manifested as an actual taste.
Additionally the previously mentioned throat issue seems to work along with this issue to make things extra worse in that when you swallow the mouth full of suffering, your throat, along with the usual spasm and pain, then somehow seems to add an additional element of taste hate to your swallowed food.
It feels like your throat excretes some vile taste on your swallowed food making it taste even worse as it goes down.
Yes this doesn't make sense but somehow my food pipe made sure to let me know that it was now despair soaked in some other vile demon piss type substance as it slowly and painfully passed down to my stomach, and it seemed like i could perceive the taste like maybe how you taste bile with stomach issues sometimes.
Possibly some mental effect, but obvious as fuck and intentionally cruel. There is a pattern in issues in the mouth area. I just dont see why. Its not like you eat the Heroin. My nose was fine but admittedly i didn't out any food in it and
I think the intent here is to make the whole process of taking in sustenance as difficult as possible for some reason that i cannot seem to fathom. I was surprised that the rest of the path the food follows does not take part in adding to your suffering in some way. So it was possible to at least eat and drink enough to survive and not suffer to much until it comes out. I made sure not to sneak a peak at what digested despair looks like. You cant unsee things.
5. Besides the scars and wounds from scratching myself fucked on the drug, all my skin was also painful and irritated during the withdrawals. Like nothing you could compare to. Basically like your skin is reporting to you that its pissed off, unhappy, irritated with no clear cause and that you are to blame and then your mind makes up some physical sensation to explain this after.
And it wasn't the wounds or scratches. The scratching wounds where a blessing in fact since there was no skin capable of adding more to the clamor of annoyed complaining flooding my perceptions.
But ok, skin irritation is acceptable and could be a reasonable symptom. I approve of it, but the mouth shit is just not right. Somebody is having a laugh.
6. Other things are harder to explain. Things where just not right. Everything was wrong physically, but more so because it says its wrong and unhappy and doesn't really clarify why.
It was like i was transplanted into some other sickly persons body and the immune system could sense me as a foreign body and was constantly giving me shit and loudly complaining about everything to get me to bugger off.
There where other things im sure have been blocked out due to shock and other things not worth mentioning like pissing fire and shitting bricks shaped like medieval weapons. The usual stuff, at least on terms of being able to explain them as something possible in current reality and likely a normal effect.
Anyways, some items sound odd or exaggerated but they where traumatic and real and not embellished. Feeling sick and shit is fine, you grit your teeth and get through it. Even some mental shit like anxiety and depression is to be expected.
But this experience seems designed to frustrate and enrage and make you curse the gods for the unnecessary unfairness of it all. It sucks out every possible joy or comfort while it lasts. I think because many of the effects feel unnatural and have not been experienced before at all and cant be explained with current levels of human understanding.
And respect to those who do real withdrawals. That must be something else i do not wish to contemplate.
So does any of this sound familiar or is this an experience designed uniquely per individual for max pain
If so i need to investigate why eating was chosen as my punishment. Hmmm
Also are there two different withdrawal levels or is this like the main one but less hardcore. Do i get experience credit, bragging rights?
Anyways, lesson learnt. Don't mix or use Kratom near your H use as it obviously adds to the withdrawals due to some impurity or poisonous cut nightshade. Beware cheap imitations and rather stick to good old tried and true Heroin, it is used and loved by millions. They cant all be wrong after all.
Anyways on the up side i soon after tried some PST for the first time and it actually worked decently, but with 1.5kg seeds, bleh but still cheap. I was careful though and also had no feelings about wanting to die after one day use.
I guess we humans never learn.
Last edited:
