Here we go off the H-Train

[Danny_M]

Hey guys just a bit about my self, 28/m been using heavy IV heroin since 2008 up until a few weeks ago. Here is my dope using life story in a nutshell to better help you under stand where I am coming from:
2008-2014 - Solid IV BTH use averaging 1/2g a day.
2014 March 1st - 11th started Methadone Maintenance Program at 60mgs a day. Made me feel like crap and I had to quit.

So, since quitting methadone on the 11th or 12th of this month I have been using pretty regularly till today, had my last shot this morning and threw my kit away.

What I wanted to do is swap the long and drawn out withdraws from the methadone and trade them for the faster yet more painful heroin withdraws.

Im scared as I am typing this post I have not been sick for a while but I can remember when it was an almost daily thing. I really want to quit, I am motivated like no other and have my personal reasons driving me to do this. I guess all im asking for is a kind word of motivation or some tip or trick that help you when you were going through this haha. I do have access to a few things that might make this week go by a bit faster and painless. I have some Imodium AD, Access to xanax, flexril,some norcos and some good ole SoCal Kush. Any bit of advise will help im tired of this crap ive seen first hand many times where this road leads lost some pals too. I just want off this ride.

 

[neversickanymore]

You can do this.. do you have any access to a gaba other than the xans?

 

[Oxy_Ghost]

You got this man, yeah if you can get a hold of gaba than that'll help. I've never tried it but I've heard I works wonders for opiate withdrawal. I went cold turkey with no meds at all to help with withdrawals. I'm 2 weeks clean now. Bluelight has been a big part in helping me recover. Everyone here has been very supportive. It's a great place to come when you need to talk or whatever you need to do.

Stay strong

 

[Vudue]

Hello new on this site. Using my iPhone having trouble navigating so please bare with me. Was told by my rehab that I am tryn to get into to report to a detox first. One of the places they sent me to was saint Joseph's in Santa Ana but when I called I was told I would be admitted into the ER and would be givin phenobarbital for my withdrawal for five days. Wich for some reason makes me nervous. Any advice anyone can give me would be truly appreciated . Sorry if this is the wrong place to ask I'm short on time and need to make the decision by tomarow should I go with this saint Joseph's hospital treatment or find away to come up with the 3000 or so bucks for a private detox? Sadly can't find a detox in the Los Angeles area who will take medical. And I don't want to get stuck in a crappy detox center. Friend of
Mine just went to a place in long beach wich basically locked him in a room and told him to man up wich is not how they explained it would work when he signed up. Been an addict for about 4 years smoking up to 2 grams of some good black tar got my self down to about a .8 of a gram a day these last two weeks. Please help any way u can. Thank you

 

[Oxy_Ghost]

Hello new on this site. Using my iPhone having trouble navigating so please bare with me. Was told by my rehab that I am tryn to get into to report to a detox first. One of the places they sent me to was saint Joseph's in Santa Ana but when I called I was told I would be admitted into the ER and would be givin phenobarbital for my withdrawal for five days. Wich for some reason makes me nervous. Any advice anyone can give me would be truly appreciated . Sorry if this is the wrong place to ask I'm short on time and need to make the decision by tomarow should I go with this saint Joseph's hospital treatment or find away to come up with the 3000 or so bucks for a private detox? Sadly can't find a detox in the Los Angeles area who will take medical. And I don't want to get stuck in a crappy detox center. Friend of
Mine just went to a place in long beach wich basically locked him in a room and told him to man up wich is not how they explained it would work when he signed up. Been an addict for about 4 years smoking up to 2 grams of some good black tar got my self down to about a .8 of a gram a day these last two weeks. Please help any way u can. Thank you

IMO, I would just go to the ER. I don't know what phenobarbital is or if it just delays withdrawals or eases them. I went cold turkey from a little over 4 years of oxy/heroin use and had no meds to help with w/d. For me after 5 days the pain and sickness wasn't that bad anymore. I'm 15 days clean now and I still have some withdrawal symps but they're bearable.

You might be right on a detox lockin you down. Most where I live operate that way. Some give methadone and some don't really give anything except maybe a few hundred mg's of ibuprofen. When i first tried to quit I went to a detox and they gave me Clonodine, some say it helps but it didn't do shit for me. They basically locked me up and said to just deal with it. So you may get a little more help and comfort from a hospital.

 

[ExInMil]

Good call on not going on methadone, been there, done that, it fucking suckkkkks.
Get the xanax for a week (FOR A WEEK), smoke weed, the muscle relaxants helped me sleep the first week, see if you can get yer hands on some gabapentin (maybe the same person you got the flexril form), the narcos id stay away from.

I'm 26, over two weeks myself from heron/all other ops you can think of and actually going to go sign up for classes right now.
You can do this, we all been there. Just stick to it, or as you know youll be back to square one.

 

[Vudue]

Thanks ghost. I looked into it and it wasn't worth risking it with the er bullshit. If I'm gna be paying money I'm gna make sure its for something that is gna work and help me get threw it with at least some comfort. Going into the Pasadena record center detox the. There month long rehab. If any one has experience with said rehab or any advice I would love to here it. I'm new to this sight but already this place has given me access to more info then most rehabs I've called and talked to. I'm coming off a pretty hard black tar smoking habit and this isn't the crap that passes for tar in skid row this is the shit that smells up a room as soon as the bag is open I am in no way bragging I'm just giving in sight as to how deep my addiction is in fact looking back I now wish I never found decent mafia and cartel connects I wish I would of stayed with the weak brown sugar looking crap I remeber thinking those kicks were hard to go threw but was able to get threw them with Xanax weed immodium mad amounts of water and gator aide but would sadly start using a few months later. Now my kicks are a thousand times worse I know time plays a factor but even now that I've cut use age in half the kicks are still 1000x worse. First time going into a detox and rehab and I'm tryn with every thing I have to make it my last. I will still use this sight for support because of the fact people here seem to tell it like it is and speak from the heart yea even the assholes who talk shit and have ridiculous suppuriority complexes at least speak some truth. Sorry for the ramble I'm just nervous. Thanks in advance for anyone that may have some words of wisdom for a fellow user/junk slave

 

[Oxy_Ghost]

Thanks ghost. I looked into it and it wasn't worth risking it with the er bullshit. If I'm gna be paying money I'm gna make sure its for something that is gna work and help me get threw it with at least some comfort. Going into the Pasadena record center detox the. There month long rehab. If any one has experience with said rehab or any advice I would love to here it. I'm new to this sight but already this place has given me access to more info then most rehabs I've called and talked to. I'm coming off a pretty hard black tar smoking habit and this isn't the crap that passes for tar in skid row this is the shit that smells up a room as soon as the bag is open I am in no way bragging I'm just giving in sight as to how deep my addiction is in fact looking back I now wish I never found decent mafia and cartel connects I wish I would of stayed with the weak brown sugar looking crap I remeber thinking those kicks were hard to go threw but was able to get threw them with Xanax weed immodium mad amounts of water and gator aide but would sadly start using a few months later. Now my kicks are a thousand times worse I know time plays a factor but even now that I've cut use age in half the kicks are still 1000x worse. First time going into a detox and rehab and I'm tryn with every thing I have to make it my last. I will still use this sight for support because of the fact people here seem to tell it like it is and speak from the heart yea even the assholes who talk shit and have ridiculous suppuriority complexes at least speak some truth. Sorry for the ramble I'm just nervous. Thanks in advance for anyone that may have some words of wisdom for a fellow user/junk slave

Yeah I'm just not one for rehabs or detox facilities. My first experience with one screwed that up for me. I probably should've went to one but I'm doing fine without it. I'm not gonna use again. My daughter has been taken away from me and I'm trying everything I can to get her back so that's enough motivation for me to stay clean. I've watched a lot of the show "Intervention" and seen a lot of people go where your planning on going. Good luck! hopefully you can kick the shit this last time

 

[Vudue]

Well I skipped detox detoxed five days my self then went to rehab. Came out and things where going good. Was one week away from two months clean and found two grams well cleaning out my studio space ( I'm an artist) tried calling my sponser who didn't pick up and ended slowly using those grams for about four days not blaming anyone but my self. I couldn't take it . Now my family all know I relapsed. They are actually taking it very well considering the situation. Giving up my wallet giving my sister control of my bank account and giving up my phone. Hitting the 24 hour mark of not using and starting to fill crappy. More so very disappointed that I wasn't able to just throw it away or give it to someone to get rid of. I'm 28 and can't even control my self wich is both sad and very annoying. Went threw all that and got out and right away got some good mural/painting jobs and u think it would of been enough to keep me clean but for some reason my brain took it as stress and the urge to use got out of hand. When I found those two grams I'm not gna lie I was a kid in a candy store. A scared diabetic kid but still a happy kid none the less. Can't give up just yet but this time it feels worse then ever. Don't know why I do this to my self. I thought I was doing everything just right. Meetings and everything.

 

[Monster36]

Melatonin really helps with sleeping. I am/was 8 days sobor. Hitting up meetings almost daily and staying with a friend who is getting clean with me. I want this bad as well, but it is hard. I've been torturing myself by reading bluelight daily on black tar H. Sigh.... I'm glad someone posted on this topic. I will be reading as well to help myself stay strong and what to do to stay sobor. I relapsed two days ago. Picked up a gram. Now I'm waking up puking again. So I start this train wreck all over again. Even though I am super temtped to use today. I am going to "TRY" and wait for a noon meeting to NA. Just got to stay strong. I got off meth after a two year usagae. I can beat this too (3 year usage).