Help Needed. My 9 year Old child is depressed

[bpayne]

yeah my girl has an underactive thyroid and they tried to diagnose her with depression, but she won't take drugs, you know what she did? she built a computer, started working hard on her business and became the TOP percent of management in her company, it lit a fire under ass and now that she's really successful she's as happy as can be, huh funny how that works

I guess what I'm trying to say is people like me don't get very depressed, even if we do it's not for long because it's quickly replaced with anger and determination and then we go out and make things happen that turn these "feelings" around. now I'm not devoid of problems, I've been a criminal most of my life and spent a lot of time in prison(wanna talk about anxiety, they didn't give me pills for that) and am starting to recover from a drug problem. but through it all I was also Acomplishing things and being productive, I didn't escape with drugs as much as used them as a crutch to make me MORE productive either way it was a bad idea. but I'm sorry it's just silly to me that depression is now a disease when little self esteem that is self served not just handed out, goes a LOOOONG way. and we all had anxiety at school dude, you don't know if your gonna fit in, it's new people, the work can be hard. I personally don't like crowded places, and it's hard for me to concentrate, but you know what, it's called forcing yourself to do it, thats what adult life is about, forcing yourself to do stuff ya don't wanna do and anyone who tells you different is lying to you and setting you up for some serious problems with this world

 

[YumDrugs21]

There is no way I would ever give my 9 year old meds/drugs crucial part of development for kids and I don't care what doctors say to me that is just gonna mess them up more. (my opinion) Anyways you could try enrolling him at a different school or even home school him for a while if you have the time in the evening or whatever. I know you are hard out for money but try asking him who his friends at school are get them together and bring them all out to ChuckEcheese or whatever you may have around that is like that, keeping involved with peers is important. (what kid doesn't like chuckecheese) If he fears going to school maybe hes getting bullied or is having a hard time socializing talk to his teacher and see what he/she has to say...definitely stemming from school it seems.

I don't kno where you live but you could try googling free cbt (your state or area) you never know whats out there. Even if you cant find an actual free therapist there is alot of info/tools out there

Good luck

 

[peruvianflake]

I help your child

 

[PillPoppingAnimal]

maannn, giving a 9 yr old anti depressants, what has this world came too...

im assuming ur child does jack shit, no sports, no friends?

enroll him in something to do in his life, something to look forward to besides video games and TV

he needs friends....no kid (or IMO anyone unless they have been thru tramatic events needs pills to be happy) needs medication


everyone in this world needs to relize, everyyyything is for money, this doctor just wants mmoney...the people who came out wit these antos..just want money

now ur spending 300$ plus medication costs for no reason

be smart, get him friends and a hobby/hobbys

 

[PoppyLlama]

i read the entire thread thus far, and I completely agree with demize, i think drugs should be the last resort, especially powerful benzos like klonopin...honestly i know what the psych could be thinking..i would strongly urge you to get a second opinion from another psychiatrist..
i understand that the feat of school is a major problem but it cannot be considered a long term medicine for a 9 year old--it really will probably cause much more harm than good..
when i was 12 my doctor put me on xanax for anxiety and all i ended up after a few years with was withdrawals and worsened anxiety when i went off of it, a huge (permanent) tolerance (causing me to take a high dose), and not giving a crap about school and other things that should have been priorities in my life. eventually i even abused it (before ever smoking weed or even drinking)..i wish i never had that script now because it messed my life up for a while. benzos can really take away a childs ambitions and cause alot of empathy issues.

i have had depression and SAD since i was a child, are you in the northern latitudes or southern? I might suggest a light therapy box as they can really help one (myself included) get through the darkness of the winter months

i know he is scared of being in school, i also used to be just after that age, to the point where i would throw up and cry and have dry heaves it was god awful...the only thing that helped me get over it was actually being forced to go to school, not in a harsh manner, but honestly the best antidepressant for me has been going to school/work and doing well, getting good grades does wonders for my mood, it also distracted and still does distract me (though im in college now) from consistent negative thinking ive had.

you say he seems happy and normal when he is playing with other children, i really think one of the main problems is not having anything to do, being alone (or not alone) with nothing to do can be the worst think for a depressed child, or adult. if you really are unable to get him to go to school, try to find some sort of daytime activity for him to do, anything to keep him busy.

i really hope you are able to help your son, im not a father myself but i had many of the same issues, i truly wish you the best of luck

edit: subscribed to thread

 

[bpayne]

I believe highly that the way we think of phrases and words in our minds contributes greatly to the way we act and see the world in the physical demension, what negativity has surrounded this kid and or how have his thought pattens been influenced by others he looks up too? heavy drug use? lots of fighting negative talking around the house? if you can work on the way he sees the world and interepets it to himself you may have half the problem

 

[Psychedelic Jay]

These drugs are not tested in children this young...

Although, these are the lowest doses of both. So the danger is going to be slightly less apparent to you and doctor. It may work, it may not, you have to wait till they take effect to see decent results, or none at all.

By the way, the clonazepam is to ward off any side effects of the anti-depressant during the beginning of the treatment that could occur, mainly the anxiety. This is standard practice.

 

[DeMiZe-420-]

Thanks for agreeing with me llama and others

i know when i read that i had to do a double take
because i know what klonopin does to me (i refuse to take it anymore unless im crashing)
i could understand if lexapro or w/e is a dopamine reuptake inh. but still a 9 year olds brain is still not full developed and having dependency on pills at that age could really cause damage in the future (look up nueroplasticity)

im a little bit shocked and angered knowing that a pediatric doctor would be so quick to get a kid drugged up instead of finding a proper diagnosis.

it makes me think of my 9 year old sister, id kill that doc for even suggesting anti-deps and benzos

 

[DeMiZe-420-]

uhh damn capitalism

i actually just found some very interesting information concerning lexapro
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Escitalopram <-- go there for further info

Discontinuation symptoms
Main article: SSRI discontinuation syndrome
Escitalopram discontinuation, particularly abruptly may cause certain withdrawal symptoms such as "electric shock" sensations (also known as "brain shivers" or "brain zaps"), dizziness, acute depressions and irritability.

Controversy
According to The New York Times, aggressive pharmaceutical marketing of escitalopram by Forest Laboratories has been controversial: the generic alternatives to the drug are cheaper, but a substantial number of doctors continue to prescribe the more expensive proprietary drug. The United States Senate Special Committee on Aging has released portions of the "Lexapro Fiscal 2004 Marketing Plan" which gives some of the details of the plans to promote use of the drug by doctors.
In 2004, two separate civil suits alleging illegal marketing of citalopram and escitalopram for use by children and teenagers by Forest were initiated by two whistleblowers, one by a non-practicing physician named Joseph Piacentile, and the other by a Forest salesman named Christopher Gobble who was disturbed at what he witnessed at Forest.
In February, 2009 these two suits received support from the US Attorney for Massachusetts and were combined into one. Eleven states and the District of Columbia have also filed notices of intention to intervene as plaintiffs in the action. At the time, these drugs were approved only for use by adults and the application for use of citalopram in children was specifically rejected by the FDA. Although it is not illegal for physicians to prescribe a medicine for an off-label use not approved by the Food and Drug Administration, it is illegal for a manufacturer to promote the drugs for such uses. The government alleged that a research study showing lack of effectiveness when taken by children was concealed from its own medical advisers and sales personnel, as well as from researchers who conducted a study financed by the company. From 2001 to 2004, Forest heavily promoted results from another clinical trial it had financed which showed the drug was effective. Federal prosecutors also allege that the company has paid kickbacks to doctors to induce them to prescribe the medicines to children. The kickbacks allegedly included baseball tickets, a $1000 certificate to one of the most expensive New York restaurants, and paid vacations. Further, the complaint alleges that in September 2004, a Forest executive testified before Congress: “I want to emphasize that, because the FDA has not approved pediatric labeling of our products, Forest has always been scrupulous about not promoting the pediatric use of our antidepressant drugs, Celexa and Lexapro. That is the law and we follow it.” It is also alleged that the company conducted so-called "seeding studies" that were, in reality, marketing efforts to promote the drug's use by doctors. Forest responded to these allegations that it "is committed to adhering to the highest ethical and legal standards, and off-label promotion and improper payments to medical providers have consistently been against Forest policy."

 

[bpayne]

I also don't believe drugs are the answer, and neither is withholding school, Structure and activity, and encouragement to face these school fears is the best course of action, I also believe that a lot of these so called therapists and psychologists make the problems worse than better a lot of the time. people have been getting along for thousands of years without taking medicine for depression and anxiety, it's called getting motivated and building self esteem through accomplishment, plain and simple.

 

[fermi]

what happened to the days when depression didn't exist, and kids either did what they were told or faced the consequences, there wasn't cases of 9 year olds being depressed, and if they were then they were put to MORE work and kept busy so they didn't have time to think about their NONexistent problems. school can be stressful and all but seriously 20 years ago that kids parent would've smacked him across the room and dared him to say he didn't want to go to school again and that kid would be a doctor or a lawyer today. instead of growing up with girly hair and painted fingernails wearing glasses with no lenses in them for their "scene"

I fully agree, bpayne. At 9, I had no time for depression because my parents kept me busy at all times - school, homework, chores, running about outside with friends, reading and sleeping. There was no option of not going to school unless I had high fever. As much as I hated rules and restrictions at 9, I must admit they taught me to face consequences of my actions and now looking at it, were something of a safety net. If I moved only within the preset rule framework it was pretty good and paradoxically free. So we did a lot of stupid things at the same time, like riding on top of elevators scaring people shitless or smoking cigarettes in empty lots. Anxiety was a part of all these things and I learned to fight it and deal with it instead of being medicated to oblivion - there was no prozac anyway. Living in Eastern Bloc in 80s was harder than in the West and I guess the depression was omnipresent - vast majority of people moaned but got on with it.

I am not saying it is a nonexistent ilness - people are just not prepared to deal with it nowadays. I try hard to vaccinate my daughter's mind against depression - I hope I succeed, it is not an easy task.

 

[DeMiZe-420-]

I fully agree, bpayne. At 9, I had no time for depression because my parents kept me busy at all times - school, homework, chores, running about outside with friends, reading and sleeping. There was no option of not going to school unless I had high fever. As much as I hated rules and restrictions at 9, I must admit they taught me to face consequences of my actions and now looking at it, were something of a safety net. If I moved only within the preset rule framework it was pretty good and paradoxically free. So we did a lot of stupid things at the same time, like riding on top of elevators scaring people shitless or smoking cigarettes in empty lots. Anxiety was a part of all these things and I learned to fight it and deal with it instead of being medicated to oblivion - there was no prozac anyway. Living in Eastern Bloc in 80s was harder than in the West and I guess the depression was omnipresent - vast majority of people moaned but got on with it.

I am not saying it is a nonexistent ilness - people are just not prepared to deal with it nowadays. I try hard to vaccinate my daughter's mind against depression - I hope I succeed, it is not an easy task.

i get the premise of what you are saying, makes sense
when you get taught respect and disapline and how to keep yourself busy you wont find youself day dreaming thinking about god only knows what

 

[fermi]

Especially at that age - this is when a lot of character building happens. Disabling problems with meds at that age will not help but could lead to lifetime dependence.

AFAIK ADs are the one of the biggest chunks of revenue for pharma corps. Helping to create a totally idle and dependent society is a sure way to preserve future revenues. Not many things shock me but this surely did.

http://awesome.good.is/transparency/web/1005/drugged-culture/flat.html

 

[n3ophy7e]

By the way, the clonazepam is to ward off any side effects of the anti-depressant during the beginning of the treatment that could occur, mainly the anxiety. This is standard practice.

This must just be a US thing, because it's certainly not standard practice in Australia! Especially not in children/adolescents!!

I also don't believe drugs are the answer, and neither is withholding school, Structure and activity, and encouragement to face these school fears is the best course of action

I completely agree with this.

I also believe that a lot of these so called therapists and psychologists make the problems worse than better a lot of the time.

Really?? What makes you say that? Do you mean psychiatrists? Because if so, I have to agree with you there. Of all the specialists I've ever seen in my life, the psychiatrists were the most useless.
But if you actually mean psychologists/therapists, I definitely have to disagree with you. Granted, sometimes it can take a few goes before you find the right psychologist that works well for you, but in then end if you get a good psychologist/therapist and are able to work with them effectively, you can potentially solve things like depression and anxiety without medication at all. It's about learning effective coping strategies and effective ways to deal with thought patterns etc. In my experience that's a pretty important and valuable thing to learn.

 

[nath6023]

^psychiatrists...don't get me started. I'm in Australia. I'm a schizophrenic and i've been depreesed since 6 yrs old. I juped of a 2 story building at 6 and survived, my poor single dad thought i was dead and couldn't see my face. He's bi-polar. 1st thing is to find out if you have problems, because genetics can play a strong role in mental illness. I was abused as a kid, and hated school after the abuse. I would constantly say things as a kid like "every body hates me" "no body loves me" and "i want to die, i hate life and people" I'm still alive at 27 now. I have been through many drugs including citalopram and the rest heroin etc. I still use codeine and cannabis to help me get through. If anything relates to your child, let me know and i will help how i can. But drugs at 9 is insane. He'll need them later in life if things go worse. Peace mate.

 

[DeMiZe-420-]

what you guys just said brings me back to that post i made earlier (with the teal color)
that huge ass paragraph pretty much explains that pharmaceutical companies they persuade and promote their pill to the doctors & in turn the doctors are quick to prescribe those pills withought making a proper diagnosis

 

[Exentric]

I thank you guys a lot for your invaluable inputs that are supportive though all have added a lot for me to concern.

I am not living in US. I am living in a third world and perhaps most of you will know how it will be like living in a third world. I don’t know of any places here that offer free consultation and treatment for my kid. There are mental health clinics around run by government thus giving free treatment, but sending my kid there would be the cruellest thing that a father can do in his life. No. I am not going to do it.

As most of you suggested, I will try to obtain a second opinion. The psychiatrist I consulted has thirty years of experience in this field. What he said is, my child would have inherited the depression from me that destroyed my career and is still troubling my life.

Antidepressants are not the final answer for depression, but when nothing else works I have no option other than trying them. What my psychiatrist said is, we will only use them to give him a kick-start and once he is on-track, soon they will be withdrawn. It is on the third appointment he wrote a script for my child. On previous occasions he suggested various non-drug approaches but sadly, nothing worked.

As I am jobless now, I even went with my kid to his school and assured him, I am going to sit there the whole day and will only depart after the school time is over. This was to give him a sense of security but that failed big-time. And only after this failure, I went to the psychiatrist because school authorities alerted me something is really troubling my kid and it would be better to arrest it at the earliest.

According to my psychiatrist, Klonopin is tried in epileptic children in high doses (as high as 6mg per day). I know 0.25mg is the tiniest dose and as my psychiatrist said, my kid will be taking this only in the initial stages to arrest the anxiety Lexapro produces. He assured me my kid will not be in need of even tapering the dose because he will only use this maximum for two weeks.

Sometimes I think, just wait for two more weeks for Lexapro to kick in and see the results. But my worries remain as what if my kid experiences another episode in his life when there is none to help him?

 

[Help?!?!]

what happened to the days when depression didn't exist, and kids either did what they were told or faced the consequences, there wasn't cases of 9 year olds being depressed, and if they were then they were put to MORE work and kept busy so they didn't have time to think about their NONexistent problems. school can be stressful and all but seriously 20 years ago that kids parent would've smacked him across the room and dared him to say he didn't want to go to school again and that kid would be a doctor or a lawyer today. instead of growing up with girly hair and painted fingernails wearing glasses with no lenses in them for their "scene"

You answered your question. People realized raising children was more than "smacking them around" or "forcing them to work" to teach them values. You know why these problems didn't occur back then? Because you got hit or ignored when it was mentioned. There are still many parents like this sadly. You may think you taught your child to work hard but you simply treated them like animals and they responded like such and learned a behavior to avoid unpleasant things. They do the work to avoid the pain. Which in a sense is what life is about but this can be taught in a more intelligent and compassionate way. It doesn't change the fact that NO ONE can really learn something when its forced upon them. They will only learn it when they chose to of their own volition. Also medicating children is never the answer, I agree with Bpayne that children need to be taught ways to deal with these problems just not with shoving work in their faces. More like talking to them and making sure they understand whats going on and finding ways that work best for them to deal with problems. Theres simply of fine line between your approach and the other and they need to be combined perfectly if you want to raise a child who truly knows what for. Show them the right amount of compassion at the right times and show them harshness when needed. Just don't choose one or the other and have it a constant. Grey, is always better than plain black or white.

 

[n3ophy7e]

Exentric I really feel for you and my heart goes out to you. I am not yet a parent but I can imagine how hard this is for you. And also as a fellow sufferer of depression I know how hard that is in itself

What he said is, my child would have inherited the depression from me that destroyed my career and is still troubling my life.

Please don't beat yourself up over this. I know that is easier said than done but it is NOT your fault. It's genetics, and you cannot blame yourself for something that you could not possibly have known would happen. I know that my father often blames himself for passing on depression and alcoholism to me, but I have always told him that he should not be sorry and that he is not to blame, because there's no way he could've known it would turn out like this.

I know that when you're depressed you're often really hard on yourself and tend to obsess over negative thoughts, but you need to forgive yourself for what has happened and focus on making your son's life better.

But my worries remain as what if my kid experiences another episode in his life when there is none to help him?

I can understand that this is a concern for you now, but he will grow up and learn ways to cope with his depression. Until he's reached that level of maturity where he can cope on his own, he will always have you to help him

 

[PoppyLlama]

it is comforting to know he wont keep him on the kpin for more than 2 weeks, that would be a complete recipe for disaster.
i feel you because i know my mom blames herself for giving me scoliosis and a pinched nerve in my back, and my dad blames himself for giving me depression and anxiety, but i dont hold them the least bit accountable. your son will be able to see that you care about him and try to help him (and im sure he already does) and he will love you and respect you for it. its not like you had a choice about what genes he gets..

and no matter what youll be there for your child, so he will always have somebody to help him when he is depressed or anxious or anything is wrong, youll be there