Have I been self medicating my possible narcolepsy/sleep apnea?

[cowardescent]

I'm 22 and I've always had trouble with falling asleep. Hell, even when I was experiencing mania back in 2013, I used to fall asleep after lunch. My doctor in America noticed it. I was waiting for an appointment and fell asleep waiting in a very short amount of time. They didn't do anything about it though.

This made me really suicidal. I was put on antipsychotics (Abilify) in 2015 to fix psychosis/mania that I experienced in 2013. Though they helped my homicidal thoughts, I became even more suicidal due to the excessive fatigue. I had to drop out of 11th grade due to being constantly tired all the time. I was homeschooled but didn't do well on the medicine and even after going off it, I gave up and failed my 11th grade school exams.

When I turned 18, I was finally able to buy things when I got a debit card. I got interested in things to keep me awake and tried caffeine tablets but to no avail. Well they did work but made me extremely nauseous (as did coffee in the past). I read online that you can use Sudafed tablets which contain pseudoephedrine as a potent OTC stimulant.

To my surprise, it worked, extremely well. I know they aren't euphoric like other stimulants and act mainly on the adrenergic system only, not agonizing dopamine receptors like cocaine and amphetamines but my mood improved susbtantially. I was energized enough to the point that I could study and get good grades. By sheer luck, I got good enough grades to enter into a high points course despite failing 11th grade twice.

When my parents found out in college that I'd been using pseudoephedrine they said they'd cut me off for drug use and throw me out as they said that using drugs isn't conducive to being successful in school or in any area of life. Though I stopped taking it, I became depressed yet again. Even after stopping antipsychotics as well, I got depressed and fatigued.

When I went to a doctor last year before lockdown, I casually mentioned how pseudoephedrine cured my fatigue and he told me that I might either have ADD or narcolepsy/sleep apnea. He thinks it's the latter as I've also experienced symptoms that fit with cataplexy (i.e. weakness in my muscles when laughing).

I'm really confused about this. Both my parents and psychiatrist said I should stop abusing pseudoephedrine/caffeine pills/energy drinks but on the other hand, they actually help me function. I stop sleeping during the day. I should note that it doesn't matter how much exercise I do or how much sleep I get. If I don't take some stimulant, I end up napping twice a day.

I'm 5ft 5in and 130lbs so my doctor said he doubts it's sleep apnea as I'm not chubby let alone obese.

 

[CrimsonRambeller820]

I have sleep apnea it's something you have to get diagnosed through a couple days at a sleep center. One night to see if you have it, and the next to calibrate the setting your CPAP has to be at. Of course, you can just get an APAP after you find out you have it so there's no use for calibration. That's kinda what I had to do cause between getting the results from my first overnight covid hit and they suddenly weren't doing any more titration studies. Still haven't even got the APAP. Also I am diagnosed adhd and find that a stimulant helps me get up and get the day started as long as I take it right when I get up, whatever the time may be. I think everyone tends to look down on drug use until it's prescribed by a doctor, then it's perfectly ok. That's probably your best route to find out what you have and get it diagnosed, then prescribed a stimulant such as Ritalin or Adderall or Dextroamphetamine. I have heard of people with ADD being prescribed a benzo, and somehow that helps yet I think it would personally just make me tired. To what degree I could function on it through school/a job I'm not certain. Just be open to whatever you get prescribed, my personal experience of having to take meds all my life and having bad reactions to antipsychotics and antidepressants, it can be a struggle because I don't feel like taking a medication for the rest of my life. Whatever works with your body chemistry. It seems to me like taking a benzo off the street everyone looses their minds and thinks you need to go to rehab but one you get it prescribed by a doctor then oh, it's okay, you just have a condition where you need to take it. Not to mention in Mexico pretty much all prescription drugs from the USA you can buy over the counter there. So I think there are alot more strict laws here about it, fueling the stigma.