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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic

Hard Tramadol Withdrawal - Day 8

J

JohnsThrowAway234

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Joined
Oct 6, 2016
Messages
28
Hello,

I once had a 600mg a day habit of Tramadol, which I sustained for a little over 1.5 years.

I tapered down to 150 per day over 2 months, then went cold turkey. I had a very hard time, and broke, resuming at 50mg.

From 50mg, I developed panic attacks every time I would alter the dose even a little.


I cold turkeyed the Tramadol from 50mg about a week ago.

I've had very little physical withdrawal from this, but would like some input on how its all going.

For most of the day I feel normal and in good spirits, but Ive had several episodes; lets say one per day, where I feel

- An intense sense of nothingness as if something in my brain has suddenly stopped. I totally tune out and feel black thoughts and a numbness.
- Depersonlized / intense feelings of unreality
- Hopelessness (extreme) during them
- Often followed by panic attack or surrounded by extreme panic
- These last around 3 hours of the day, I call them "episodes". Very strange moods
- During them I remain aware intellectually of where I am etc, who Im with.
- No physical symptoms.

Does this ring true with anyone? They go beyond mere mood swings and otherwise the day is reasonable.

My big fear is seizures but these strange episodes or moods or whatever they are do last for an hour or three. No history of seizures to my knowledge.

Day 8 ; looking for timelines really and to compare notes.

John
 
Hey I'm going through the same thing I have been on tramadol for a little over two years and stopping her turkey is very hard the best thing you can do is find something that can help you with the withdrawals very very hard I'm going through it now I have been clean for about a month and I still have some withdrawals
 
Do you get something like the "episodes" I describe above? They feel very frightening and stark. Im not certain they can be entirely ascribed to "panic attacks" although they accompany one another.

My fear now is seizures.

My second fear is "how long"!
 
Mind over matter sums up withdrawal to me perfectly. Sometimes it's inevitable due to the severity of your syndrome, but part of keeping it manageable is being able to control your fragile mental state without completely breaking down. You can't let anxiety break you by wondering constantly, "will it get worse", "what can I do", "I can't do this", "this is terrible". You have to overcome this and find a way to approach the situation with a "this won't be the end of the world" attitude.

You really have to try to be strong. Convince yourself somehow that you're a strong individual. Think of all of the benefits of being free from Opioids, even if that goal is as crazy as having your tolerance lowered to zero (story of my life). You can do this. You are on a pretty low dose of Opioid. This is meaningless, as the experience of withdrawal is pretty subjective due to the aforementioned psychological aspect. What this does mean is that you should be able to easily manage your symptoms, stay hydrated and maybe even eat.

You're doing great. Keep up the good work and I'm sure the rest of us are just as proud that you're kicking.
 
Thank you. I really needed this.

I've never been a fragile person, Tramadol made me so okay with everything for so long that I need to rebuild my coping skills and address my anxiety & panic issues.

I have determined that the depersonalization symptoms I was having are possibly the result of extreme fear in its own right - just plain old anxiety - and some from the anxiety of the withdrawal itself. But here I am, I did it.

Its Day 9 from tapering down to one tablet a day. I had convinced myself if I changed it I'd develop anti depressant discontinuion syndrome and then seizures and then that I'd feel depressed for months. Basically built it all up in my head.

But I said today "fuck it" and I'm sitting down to do some normal work. I can do this.

Thanks again mate. I accept what you're saying and will beat this shit.
 
Honestly, it sounds like some PAWS symptoms (post acute withdrawal syndrome). Depression and depersonalization always seemed to happen right after physically kicking opioids for me. And I really don't have a hard time with PAWS, but I always had that off feeling the first week after being sick. Kind of the " is this all there is" feeling coupled with looking at myself as a 3rd party going through the motions

Your brain is healing. It takes time.

ANd like above poster said-- positive mindset helps so much. You just did something many people--for whatever reason --can't do. You kicked opioids. Be proud and let that motivate you. You really won't feel like that forever. I promise.
 
things will get better. hang in there. find things to do to keep your mind from focusing on how bad you feel.
 
Hi guys,

Check in - I'm now on Day 14. I'll keep updating this thread for future people.

- There has certainly been improvement, but its not linear and it isn't as fast as one would like
- If last week was "severe" then this week has been "moderately" hard
- Depersonlization has receded a lot and I have had no "mental drop out" sensations as described in my original comment for 6 days
- I had EXTREME anxiety around and during my first week, that is now manageable.
- If last week was severely distressing, this week is only moderately unpleasant.
- I AM Depressed & anxious ("why am I not better!") in the morning but that lifts as the day goes on
- I must stop Googling symptoms.
- I am seeking out CBT on Monday to fight back against the anxiety and black moods in the mornings.
- I am unwilling to use an SNRI, other opiods, or whatever - I would like to see how this improves on its own rather than turn to pills again and live in fear of the next withdrawal.

It's likely some kind of long drawn out withdrawal from such high use over a year that Im in; bolstered by a hell of a final acute jolt jumping off the last 50mg.

Being objective, I've made solid, solid progress considering the fact that I had a one year 600mg habit. I tapered it as far as I could and by the time I was at 50mg any change would produce withdrawal like issues. I believe I made the right decision now to simply stop at 50mg and face the music.

The plan is just to continue "being busy", and try to replace the anxious and depressed thoughts in my head with more useful things.
 
Last edited:
Hello everyone,

Day 18. I've had a few wobbly days - mostly characterised by some depression and anxiety. I ruminate a lot about "not feeling good yet" and that worsens things.

Does anyone have any words of encouragement or non drug ideas?

I'd also be interested in hearing from people who had a hard time after stopping tramadol and whether things level out.
 
JohnsThrowAway234 said:
Thank you. I really needed this.

I've never been a fragile person, Tramadol made me so okay with everything for so long that I need to rebuild my coping skills and address my anxiety & panic issues.

I have determined that the depersonalization symptoms I was having are possibly the result of extreme fear in its own right - just plain old anxiety - and some from the anxiety of the withdrawal itself. But here I am, I did it.

Its Day 9 from tapering down to one tablet a day. I had convinced myself if I changed it I'd develop anti depressant discontinuion syndrome and then seizures and then that I'd feel depressed for months. Basically built it all up in my head.

But I said today "fuck it" and I'm sitting down to do some normal work. I can do this.

Thanks again mate. I accept what you're saying and will beat this shit.
Click to expand...

Nobody thinks you're a weak person, but Opioids can turn us all into weak people, even if it's just temporary. After quitting Opioids and being clean for a time, you notice things. For instance, simple things like say, getting out of the shower can seem pretty difficult. I know that once I step out of the nice, hot shower, I'm going to immediately get cold and it seems like an unbearable experience. Going through a day of work seems like an impossible task. You have to find a strength within yourself and it looks like this is exactly what you're doing.

Great job OP. Like I've said already, we're all very proud of you in our own ways I'm sure. A lot of us are Opioid addicts who can't fathom completely quitting or even going through a single withdrawal phase.
 
Just having 18 days without any opiods is an accomplishment in and of itself. Whatever other symptoms you might be experiencing, I can gurantee it won't be long before they also disappear. You're pretty much on the doorstep of feeling 100% yourself again.
 
I've been through what you're going through.

I developed addiction to tram and quitted it many times during my life.

150mg bupropion ER helped me with withdrawals.

Also I used harmala extract with success too (replacing bupropion)
 
Keif' Richards said:
Mind over matter sums up withdrawal to me perfectly. Sometimes it's inevitable due to the severity of your syndrome, but part of keeping it manageable is being able to control your fragile mental state without completely breaking down. You can't let anxiety break you by wondering constantly, "will it get worse", "what can I do", "I can't do this", "this is terrible". You have to overcome this and find a way to approach the situation with a "this won't be the end of the world" attitude.

You really have to try to be strong. Convince yourself somehow that you're a strong individual. Think of all of the benefits of being free from Opioids, even if that goal is as crazy as having your tolerance lowered to zero (story of my life). You can do this. You are on a pretty low dose of Opioid. This is meaningless, as the experience of withdrawal is pretty subjective due to the aforementioned psychological aspect. What this does mean is that you should be able to easily manage your symptoms, stay hydrated and maybe even eat.

You're doing great. Keep up the good work and I'm sure the rest of us are just as proud that you're kicking.
Click to expand...






You can do it op.


You just have to believe.
 
Day 21 checkin (3 weeks).

The Good
- If there was or is an acute withdrawal, that's surely done now
- The most acute anxiety / depersonalization is over
- I am at home with my parents who have been very loving and caring
- I have been relaxing and treating myself where possible

The Bad
- I am now battling with a depression thats set in.
- I have been unhappy in my life but would describe this depression as different / worse than normal experience. It was not present while on the Tramadol and has only emerged after stopping.
- It seems plausible that it is the later stages of withdrawal or PAWS as someone said above
- I still don't really feel "right" at all times but there has been improvement, its just very slow
- Very emotionally friable. Very. Anything can bring on tears.

Strategy
- I recognize that the best way to deal with depression is to soldier on
- I've been using CBT, mindfulness and so on to challenge negative / depressing thoughts;
- Although the above
- Some exercise
- Have been eating reasonably
- Nights are better
- Anxious, but able to recognize that and challenge it



All I can do is stay off it and keep pushing forward really. I am convinced that an anti depressant is not appropriate for me at this point; I don't like the idea one of relying on a tablet to feel normal again one bit.
 
Great work man! You´re doing really good, keep on!
Didn´t know that tramadol withdrawal would be THIS bad.
 
Exciting, Final Update

Hello everyone. 24 days out from my last tablet.

I've had a great breakthrough with all of this, which is simply that I have a pre-existing Anxiety Disorder. Nothing more.

I stumbled across the e-book "DARE: The New Way to End Anxiety & Panic Attacks", which I dismissed at first, but then decided to try because my "withdrawal" symptoms had not been improving.

Within an hour of reading the book after a night of worrying and tossing and turning about losing my mind, I began to see sense. I recognize absolutely everything described in the book in myself. I have an anxiety issue. Thats all I needed to know to begin my true recovery - to know what's "wrong" with me and to begin working on it. Previously, believing that I was simply 100% at the mercy of Tramadol withdrawal, even weeks later, was really getting me down and creating worry ("how long will it last!") which has gotten out of control. I thought I had ruined my brain etc. This is apparently a classic thought associated with anxiety and anxiety cycles.

I'm safe at home with friends and family who have helped me immensely. and I am more than willing to work on my anxiety issue.

As for being depressed, that is largely tied to the anxiety I've been having and has been improving steadily. I had gotten so down about not feeling normal, which is understandable.

I'm not "cured" of my anxiety after reading a book - not by any means - but I have identified the issue Im facing and I trust myself to take the neccesary action. It is my understanding that anxiety is highly treatable and that what Ive been experiencing is simply my nervous system in high gear for weeks. (Depersonalization, panic attacks, racing thoughts, feeling hopeless about my own recovery).

Thank you for your help everyone. I should also note that it now makes sense to me why Tramadol was so magnetic - it is known to help with anxiety, something I had not put a name to beforehand. No wonder it became my DOC.
 
^Well done man. Think about what you've accomplished more than what you have to do. There was a large chunk of my teenage years and early 20's where being clean any longer than 24 hours seemed like complete insanity. You have weeks!
 
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