Blog Happy… then sad… then happy.. then sad again.

[I'm-Still-Alive]

How did your ultrasound go? Did you see your Dr yet?
And what do you mean your boyfriend won't 'let' you do anything other than come straight home? Is this a concern because of your health or is it a control thing? Cause if it's the latter, maybe a new place isn't the only thing you should be looking for. And forgive me if I'm wrong about this but how much of the stress you feel is due to fights with him? Maybe talking to him and telling him you need to do something healthy as an outlet, he would compromise on something.

Ultrasound was clear, which was to be expected… doctor is putting me on yet another type of birth control to try to control the bleeding, if that does nothing, we schedule with the surgeon.

I don’t really know how much of it is a concern for my health or a control thing. But the stress is crazy. I’ve expressed it to him a lot recently and he throws it in my face. He says that when we were first together I never cared about going out (true, but I wasn’t living with him so I had the freedom of doing things on my own). Now all I want is to go do things. I just want to do small things even, like go have a picnic at the park (that was one of our first dates) or go window shopping. He won’t budge.

As far as the seizures are concerned, in your other comment, my Neurologist has diagnosed me with Epilepsy. I just also have a form that is triggered by stress for whatever reason. He said I’m a weird, special case. Not one that happens often. I do still get the common triggers for epilepsy, such as high frequency strobe lights, etc. that everyone knows about, but high stress also impacts me. It was because of how my brain was forming as a child… instead of handling stress properly, I seize. So, that’s cool.

 

[rentedbythehour]

Ultrasound was clear, which was to be expected… doctor is putting me on yet another type of birth control to try to control the bleeding, if that does nothing, we schedule with the surgeon.

I don’t really know how much of it is a concern for my health or a control thing. But the stress is crazy. I’ve expressed it to him a lot recently and he throws it in my face. He says that when we were first together I never cared about going out (true, but I wasn’t living with him so I had the freedom of doing things on my own). Now all I want is to go do things. I just want to do small things even, like go have a picnic at the park (that was one of our first dates) or go window shopping. He won’t budge.

As far as the seizures are concerned, in your other comment, my Neurologist has diagnosed me with Epilepsy. I just also have a form that is triggered by stress for whatever reason. He said I’m a weird, special case. Not one that happens often. I do still get the common triggers for epilepsy, such as high frequency strobe lights, etc. that everyone knows about, but high stress also impacts me. It was because of how my brain was forming as a child… instead of handling stress properly, I seize. So, that’s cool.

Wow. I didn't know you were bleeding. Have you tried an IUD? Not to be too personal but I've had an IUD for 20 years. I'm on my 4th one now. I haven't had a period in almost all that time. It's great. I'm not sure how old you are or if you plan on having kids, but has anyone mentioned an ablation? Look up novasure just to get and idea of what I mean.

It sounds like a serious conversation needs to happen with you and your man. I think it's important for you to be able to do the things you want, even if he doesn't agree. Especially if it's something as simple as window shopping or going to the park. Is the issue more that you want him to come with you and he doesn't want to go or is it the he doesn't want you to go anywhere period? Time away from each other and having your own life is kinda essential for a healthy relationship.

I understand the stress thing. My neurologist said I needed a job with 0 stress (like that exists). I get migraines that have never really been controlled and stress is a big factor for me. Do you ever do anything to control your stress? Breathing techniques work for me sometimes. You know I'm thru the nose, out thru the mouth. To keep my mind from wandering while I'm doing that I visualize colors. It's always a light, pleasant, uplifting color going in thru the nose, and black/dark grey coming out of my mouth. I can feel the muscles relaxing in my back when I do that. And like someone suggested earlier, exercise is a great way to reduce stress. Even walking for 15 minutes a day. The hormones that get released during stressful times do so much damage to your body.

 

[I'm-Still-Alive]

Wow. I didn't know you were bleeding. Have you tried an IUD? Not to be too personal but I've had an IUD for 20 years. I'm on my 4th one now. I haven't had a period in almost all that time. It's great. I'm not sure how old you are or if you plan on having kids, but has anyone mentioned an ablation? Look up novasure just to get and idea of what I mean.

It sounds like a serious conversation needs to happen with you and your man. I think it's important for you to be able to do the things you want, even if he doesn't agree. Especially if it's something as simple as window shopping or going to the park. Is the issue more that you want him to come with you and he doesn't want to go or is it the he doesn't want you to go anywhere period? Time away from each other and having your own life is kinda essential for a healthy relationship.

I understand the stress thing. My neurologist said I needed a job with 0 stress (like that exists). I get migraines that have never really been controlled and stress is a big factor for me. Do you ever do anything to control your stress? Breathing techniques work for me sometimes. You know I'm thru the nose, out thru the mouth. To keep my mind from wandering while I'm doing that I visualize colors. It's always a light, pleasant, uplifting color going in thru the nose, and black/dark grey coming out of my mouth. I can feel the muscles relaxing in my back when I do that. And like someone suggested earlier, exercise is a great way to reduce stress. Even walking for 15 minutes a day. The hormones that get released during stressful times do so much damage to your body.

Well, I want kids in the next few years, though if things don’t even out (financially, mentally, physically, etc) it won’t be feasible. So I didn’t really want an implant, and ablations have the possibility of making you infertile… I don’t know. Just scary. I’ve wanted to be a mom for years.

As far as the conversation… he doesn’t want me going anywhere period, because where we live “is dangerous” and people are always getting shot or stabbed. But it’s no worse than any other city. I’ve done a lot worse in my teen years than he can imagine, but he thinks I’m a fragile girl. So I try to compromise by trying to get him to come with me to places but he. Just. Won’t. It’s so frustrating. “What if we can’t get back in the driveway?” “I’m too busy” “No, my Mom asked me to babysit my nephew this weekend so we have to do that.” Every. Weekend. Because he won’t learn how to change his nephew’s diaper and I have to, and his nephew is old enough to potty train, but his family won’t do that. so I’m stuck doing it. Sorry. I’m just ranting now.

 

[rentedbythehour]

Well, I want kids in the next few years, though if things don’t even out (financially, mentally, physically, etc) it won’t be feasible. So I didn’t really want an implant, and ablations have the possibility of making you infertile… I don’t know. Just scary. I’ve wanted to be a mom for years.

As far as the conversation… he doesn’t want me going anywhere period, because where we live “is dangerous” and people are always getting shot or stabbed. But it’s no worse than any other city. I’ve done a lot worse in my teen years than he can imagine, but he thinks I’m a fragile girl. So I try to compromise by trying to get him to come with me to places but he. Just. Won’t. It’s so frustrating. “What if we can’t get back in the driveway?” “I’m too busy” “No, my Mom asked me to babysit my nephew this weekend so we have to do that.” Every. Weekend. Because he won’t learn how to change his nephew’s diaper and I have to, and his nephew is old enough to potty train, but his family won’t do that. so I’m stuck doing it. Sorry. I’m just ranting now.

That's quite alright. As a mom of 2 (now grown) boys I can relate. Boys potty train later than girls do. My kids Dr told me to not even start until they were 3-4 years old. She said boys are just different. And as far as the constant babysitting goes, my sister does the same thing to me. My nephew is 8 though and very capable of entertaining himself. She tells me she'll only be gone a little while and then comes back 10 hours later.
I asked about the kids thing because they don't usually do an ablation until after you've had kids. It was the same with my IUD. I mean if it's an option, it's pretty simple thing to get done. The IUD I mean. And it's good for up to 7 years. Some people wind up bleeding more though.
I would have a talk with your boyfriend. I mean even if you planned a date night once every other week or something, it would help. There must be tons of things to do during the summer. Concerts, plays, art shows. If he would commit to that, you'd be getting out at least.

 

[I'm-Still-Alive]

That's quite alright. As a mom of 2 (now grown) boys I can relate. Boys potty train later than girls do. My kids Dr told me to not even start until they were 3-4 years old. She said boys are just different. And as far as the constant babysitting goes, my sister does the same thing to me. My nephew is 8 though and very capable of entertaining himself. She tells me she'll only be gone a little while and then comes back 10 hours later.
I asked about the kids thing because they don't usually do an ablation until after you've had kids. It was the same with my IUD. I mean if it's an option, it's pretty simple thing to get done. The IUD I mean. And it's good for up to 7 years. Some people wind up bleeding more though.
I would have a talk with your boyfriend. I mean even if you planned a date night once every other week or something, it would help. There must be tons of things to do during the summer. Concerts, plays, art shows. If he would commit to that, you'd be getting out at least.

He won’t stick to a commitment anymore though… it always gets pushed back. I’m so tired of it.