i am currently working on repairing my relationship with the love of my life, my soulmate and would like some advice from someone who has had similar experiences. we fell in love the first time we met and moved in together shortly after. a few months in and i was going through some mental health issues, i was terribly depressed to the point of suicidal planning. i have attempted suicide in the past and have struggled with depression my whole life and drug addiction but am now clean and happy. so a few months in i was getting very depressed so i went to my doc and they switched my anti depressants, i was on celexa for nearly ten years and they switched me to luvox. everyday i would take my dose when i woke up and as swoon as it got in my i would feel like i had no control over my thoughts, emotions and will in general. i became very aggressive and destructive. everyday i would wake up and be utterly angry and break things, yell, cry and i unknowingly put her in an environment of violence and ultimately abuse. i hate conflict and am very much against any form of abuse so when this behaviour started, and i had no control over it it would scare her to the point of she left and went to a womens safe house because she feared for her safety./ i never meant to hurt her or scare her in any way i love her with every ounce of my soul and heart and the guilt i still have nfrom this is still hard to deal with. she is giving me another chance because i believe she knows im not a bad person. she thinks i have severe anger and am abusive by nature but im not i just made some terrible mistakes which i deeply regret everyday. i will never stop loving her and if we ever leave eachother again it feels like i could never love another person the way i do her. i just want to know what i can do to make her know that im seriously a changed man and have taken responsibility and that it was the antidepressants that basically made me crazy. thanks for taking the time to read my little cry for help and hope to hear from you.
much love.
much love.
