no in ireland if your not married the mother has sole custody,in irish law it states 'mother' and not parent.which is sexist as fuck,i have the same right to my son as you do,THATS NOT A JOKE.
if my ex girl friend hooked up with some one in the morning,she could allow her new man to adopt my son with out even telling me.
i have signed his birth cert but thats not considered legal proof of father hood and the mother has the rite to pay 20e and take my name off it if she wishes.
in ireland there is a group called 'fathers for justice' who carry out illegal stunts to bring this law to attention in the media to try to get it changed
oh i forgot to mention my landlord called in today and cut my rent in half,untill i can get rent allowance...so booya.
he was actually quite amazing he told me he knows what im going through as his wife ran off to england with his kid...fair play to him
eireann i dont know where you get your info from??? - but you are
WAY off on a few things!!! - for starters it does NOT take 3 months for rent allowance to come through!!! - That wud be insane - if that was the case then countless people wud become homeless all over the place - you can get rent allowance sorted out straight away - once you get going and + get forms ect filled in fast - sometimes it can take a week or 2 for the forms to be processed but you can get emergency rent allowance payment while the paper work is going through - i know this because i have had to do this twice
re:fathers rights - of course you have more rights to your child then people on this site - who told you that you dont have any rights to your son??? - ffs that is just stupid - you need to go to dolphin house family court + file a custody order for legal guardianship to your son - it is free to go to the family court if your not working so there is nothing holding you back from doing it straight away - dont sit around doing nothing - the judge will
always grant legal guardianship to the father married or not married - unless the mother can prove that you are in some way a danger to your son - she has to prove anything bad tat she says about you - she cant just go into the judge + make up a pile of crap - if tat was the case then no father would be able to see their kids - i have legal guardianship of both my daughters - you got 2 get that sorted - think logically - look the mother is already letting you see your son anyway so im sure she wont give you much hassle there anyway - she is not your enemy - she is your sons mother + remember boys love their mas
once you dont fuck up + once you pay a
PROPER amount maintenance for your child then of course you have rights to see your child - the judge will grant you time with your son - so who ever told you that you dont have rights is talking total crap - you have to get up + sort this out - some dads just sit there winging that they dont have rights + moaning tat the mother wont let them see their kids + yet they just sit there + do nothing about it - knowledge is power
you will need to find a job to support your son - i know there are fuck all jobs in ireland at the moment - but if you really want a job then you will find one for your sons sake - some of my mates have kids but they have never worked a single day since their kids were born - they hand the kids mother a miserable 20 quid a week + then they moan because the mother of the kid is pissed off - i cant blame a mother in that position been pissed off - 20 quid wont keep a kid in nappies for the week - let alone rent - bills - food - clothes + life in general - you gotta get a job + support your kid - it doesnt matter what money the mother has - if she is rich or poor it doesnt matter - if she is getting single mothers allowance it doesnt matter - the allowance is fuck all anyway - YOU the father have to support your kid with a decent amount of maintenance + prove to the mother + your son + the judge that you are a responsible father
i have 2 daughters by 2 different mas - believe me its hard work - its hard to keep the peace but i try my best to respect my kids mas - its hard when you see them moving on with their own lifes but you just got to swallow it - her life has nothing to do with you any more - trust me on this one - my oldest daughter is 25 - i fought with her ma non stop for the first 2 years of my daughters life - we had split up when my girl was 3 months old - we fought + fought + one day i said no more fighting + i became the peace keeper - i just concentrated on my little girl + things settled down + life became good for all - no more fighting - its the only way - tat is important advice - please take it - for your sons sake - he doesnt want to see you shouting at his ma all the time - kids remember everything
what you need to do NOW is go to dolphin house court + sort of access to your son + you need to get a job - any fucken job so you can support your son - get a job in mc donnalds if you have to - i know tat its not easy - i have been there + worn the t shirt - life is not easy - but once you stop fighting with the ma + let her have a life - once you make a new life for your self - and once you get a job support your son + sort out access then everything else will fall into place -
its not easy - if fact its poxey hard - but it will work out ok in the end once you make peace with your kids ma - emotions are raw now - there is probably a lot of anger on both sides - remember that you are not always right no more then she is - but if you take the higher moral ground + stop fighting then the kids ma will do the same + ur son will have a happier life because of it - i know ex girlfriends can be hard work - u wanna meet my ex - ffs godzilla is a puppy compared to my ex - she loves nothing better then to fight with me + put me down - she knows just how to make me feel like shite - but since i took that power away from her - once i stopped letting her get to me i felt so much better + my daughter didnt have to witness any more arguments - so make sure tat you become the peace keeper - it doesnt matter if she is fucking a different bloke every weekend - tats not your business anymore - forget about tat - dont even discuss things like tat with her because it just makes you sound like the jealous ex fella - she is young so she will meet other blokes + u will meet other girls as well
u be the peace keeper - tat will probably be very hard for someone like you - most people have seen you causing countess arguments on this site - you come across as very judgemental to other people - u seem to think your always right no matter how many people disagree with you - it just seems to be in your nature to be arrogant - well that is how you come across on bl anyway - so you have got to change that - sorry mate im not trying to give u a hard time - buts tis is the time to face facts - stop arguing + become the best dad that tat any boy could ever have -
ffs tis is the longest post tat i have ever wrote on bl - but been a good dad + getting on with the kids ma is something i know a lot about - its going to be hard bloody work - but you do have rights as the kids dad - ffs of course u have rights - so now u have got to go + get it all sorted - dont sit around saying u have no rights - the sooner u go to dolphin house the sooner it will get sorted - best of luck with it mate + trust me you will start to feel better in time - it really is true that time heals all - also maybe if you take a step back + stop fighting with your kids mother then maybe yous could even work things out + give it another go together - you never know - but you have got to change + she will probably have to change too
Look up chickenscratch and divorce on this forum. He has spoken about it in length and so has Busty. Both male and have been through it.
