frustration with repetition

[bc]

why is it
that i feel like the past is repeating itself.
over and over the same sequence.
new people,
new location.
same fucking story.
goddammit why am i stuck living in my past?
i go around like a merry-go-round.
always returning to my starting point,
seeing the same things each time through. unable,
for some reason to change them.
where am i going.
and when.
------------------
bc-
**Proud to be an Official member of the Stuck-Up/8-Up Crew**
"Fuck PLUR! it's all about hardcore ass fucking!!"
We'll make great pets...
"drug suppliers, typically wearing 'Ecko' brand sweat shirts shuffle around the dance floor, chanting softly, 'want some pills? k?'" - Shu Shin Luh, The Chicago Sun-Times

 

[satori18]

word

 

[Mr. Sticky]

Nothing against your words, bc...but I think I like satori's response just as much.

Keep writing, my friend...keep churning it out until you can feel a change.

 

[ice-9]

This poem really hit a sensitive nerve in me, since it expressed a lot of emotions i have been going through. Thank you enough for your words. Very good.

 

[beguiling charms]

another spin on this topic:
ever get that feeling inside,
deep in your gut,
in your darkest center of you soul?
the place you know you trust.
beyond any word.
beyond any person.
knowing it to be true,
above all else.
do you listen to it?
and when this feeling tells you...
that is the one.
the one for you.
'perfect'.
how can you not listen?
i listen.
i'm compelled to.
this place, your inner self,
it doesn't speak often.
and on this subject it's spoken to me 3 times.
each time, i heeded it's words.
sought after her,
after happiness.
completion.
the first time.
years of agony.
years of fantasy.
pursuit.
and in the end, all for naught.
why didn't she see?
why didn't she know?
why didn't she listen?
so it comes around again.
and again,
circumstances don't permit it's realization.
constraints beyond the power of both,
even though the feeling is mutual.
another 2 years of want.
another 2 years of torture.
and now, this cycle repeats.
and i want to listen.
i have to listen.
but why does listening have to hurt so much?
when will things fall into place.