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Forbidding and forcing orgasms NSFW

M

_mistresspoppy_

Bluelighter
Joined
Dec 23, 2010
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169
I'm just a bit curious about other people's opinions/experiences on this subject. My SO has a habit of getting me as worked up as possible- fleeting touches, quick kisses, until I'm begging for him to take me to bed. And then he has to go, and forbids me from orgasming until we are together. It can be days until we get together. We see each other all the time, but he uses this time to tease me even more, making me wait for sex. His theory is that this sex will be more intense when we are together. At times, I find this to be true, but other times it's just frustrating. Also, he seems to be slightly jealous of me getting off by myself, as if I'm cheating by climaxing without him. So, what's your experience with orgasm refusal? (this is different from getting to the brink of orgasm then denying it, but I'd be curious to hear about that too.)
At other times, he likes to attempt to force my orgasms. NSFW
He holds our most powerful vibrator (hitachi magic wand on HIGH) hard against my clitoris. In the wrong spot this just vibrates my pelvic bone and hurts, in the "right" spot, it creates an intense feeling in my stomach similar to riding a roller coaster- the stomach- dropping feeling of falling, combined with a sexual feeling that is more of a fiery burning. Only a woman can know the sensation I'm talking about. It doesn't feel good, but its not exactly painful. It makes me want to scream and thrash away from the feeling. He LOVES to do this to me, and I try to indulge his fantasies at times. When I ask him why he insists on doing this, he replies, "in the pornos this always makes the girl squirt!" we had a discussion about how porn is not real, but this remains one of his favorite foreplay activities, in spite of the fact that it is a total turn off for me on top of physically exhausting me. So, I'm wondering if anybody has had a positive experience with this method? Does this actually result in powerful orgasms, or is it just some wet dream fantasy created by porn producers?
 
Extended tease and orgasm denial are core elements in my toolkit. Both - along with other sorts of psychological play - can dramatically intensify sexual heat and make for unbelievably intense orgasms when finally permitted.

I tease my woman with dark threats and hints of all sort of filthy things in her future for hours before we are actually able to get busy. When we're on the street I tell her when I catch some construction workers scoping her out and explain to her how crudely we men talk about women when we are alone - how those nasty dudes were undoubtedly placing bets on whether she takes it up the ass, etc. She'll shudder and start to get wet and I'll pull her into a doorway and stick my hand under her skirt and rub her pussy lightly over her panties for just a few seconds before refusing to let her come and sternly reminding her that is absolutely not allowed without permission and it's unlikely she'll be able to do anything dirty enough to inspire me to let her come later - tsk tsk tsk........:)

This sort of thing builds over hours until it's actually time to fuck - then the actual physical tease and repeatedly bringing her to the brink without allowing her to come starts. She - like many women - can get overly frustrated and uncomfortable if it goes on too long without relief - so it's always a fine line between driving her insane and going too far. When it seems like she can't take it anymore I'll let her have one - "only ONE - so you better fucking come hard...." ;) - then step back to teasing on and off while eventually moving towards letting her come as often as she wants before I finish. This woman can come without being touched if she is horny enough so the tease really works for her......

90% of sex is in the head and that's what really expands it and makes it art/science/spiritual....
 
Man fuck reading all that shit but I love watching femdom handjobs. Tease and denial, fucking yes. Orgasm denial anyone?
Post orgasm torture for extra win.
 
Love doing it to my wife, but there is a point where too much is too much... He's surely exerting his power over you, and it seems you like that; however he needs to know when to let you loose. Too much teasing becomes obnoxious and will almost kill the moment instantaneously.
 
I don't have the attention span to read all that, but withholding an orgasm to the very last moment, makes it feel all the better. It's like you can build it up, if you have the self control, and then just let it burst through.
 
To also answer your question, OP; from my understanding this is not how you make a women squirt. It's a matter of massaging her g-spot, starting slowly, and building it faster and faster. The squirting has to happen when both parties want it, if the women is not willing to let it go (that feeling of having to 'pee'), it will never happen. Essentially, he is edging your orgasm, which can be fun, but no, that is not how you 'get a girl to squirt'.

If that's his whole mission, and you are willing to make it happen, you two should do some more reading and research on squirting.

He's doing two different things in 1, but missing his whole goal. He's edging you to show a little dominance and power, yet trying to make you squirt, which isn't happening. -- I like to edge my wife, but not to make her squirt, more less to make her really beg for the orgasm, which in turn makes me super hot. I then build her back up and time it perfectly so we cum at the same time. I don't do it in hopes of making her squirt, that's a whole different method/ballgame.
 
Wow I'm stupid - I ranted away without even having read your whole post OP....sorry....


Your boyfriend is an asshole. That's what I would have posted had I read yours initially. If you don't enjoy the sex you need to tell him/leave. Good luck....
 
Don't know that it has to be a dom/sub dynamic per se. Withholding orgasm is a basic part of tantra.
 
I'm with sockpuppet, even the most extreme sub/dom relationships have clear boundaries, and not wanting to feel like your cunt is being cheese-grated has to be up there... You should always have to right to refuse to do things that make you uncomfortable.
 
I do feel every couple should discuss what each other are into and find out what works for them both. Surprisingly how shy some couples can be. Some sexual things that one person finds arousing to another might be emotionally dis-stressing. A lot of women don't like men watching porn for example. Or a lot of men would find it hard to give there partner up to a man in a threesome.

Personally, I want to be my partners fantasy, her only sexual stimulation. For me, I want that attention from her. Erotic novels, porn, 3 sums, they don't interest me. For me, if my partner wanted a 3sum with another man, I'd feel sexually inadequate that she feels the need and has the excitement to be with another man when she has me.

Not that I don't like being dirty, because of course I do ;) an a little kinky, I just don't like to share.
 
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I really don't like this part... this is crossing boundaries that you should not continue to allow.

He holds our most powerful vibrator (hitachi magic wand on HIGH) hard against my clitoris. In the wrong spot this just vibrates my pelvic bone and hurts, in the "right" spot, it creates an intense feeling in my stomach similar to riding a roller coaster- the stomach- dropping feeling of falling, combined with a sexual feeling that is more of a fiery burning. Only a woman can know the sensation I'm talking about. It doesn't feel good, but its not exactly painful. It makes me want to scream and thrash away from the feeling. He LOVES to do this to me, and I try to indulge his fantasies at times. When I ask him why he insists on doing this, he replies, "in the pornos this always makes the girl squirt!" we had a discussion about how porn is not real, but this remains one of his favorite foreplay activities, in spite of the fact that it is a total turn off for me on top of physically exhausting me.
Click to expand...

The bolded stuff is things I felt a real, caring, loving man would not put their woman through. I would never treat my girl the way your boyfriend treats you.

You should have him re-evaluate what's more important, his power trip or your happiness, then proceed from there. This guy sounds like a complete tool who's taking something that's supposed to be sexy and kinky, and making it an extreme domination/submission day to day life that I can't imagine feels good.

Best of luck to you <3
 
Hitachi wand for the win ! I also force my girlfriend ALOT.. I hope you are lucky and you can have alot, one after the other....


just to make it clear, I use the same hitachi wand on my girlfriend to force her to orgasm 4-5 times..after that she will pass out :P
 
^ Oh, definitely. Otherwise, that would be wicked frustrating. But if both are into it and the withholding is not done to the point of annoyance, forcing and withholding can be great. Discuss boundaries! Your sex life will be much better for it!
 
My husband ensures I have at least 5 orgasms before he even thinks about his own. Squirting involves gspot stimulation. My husband would like me to squirt every time multiple times when we have sex. He knows how to make it happen as do I. Sometimes when I feel like it is too much mental pressure to perform I say so and we move on to something different. Last night he was intent on ramming his fingers into me and I said that does nothing for me BUT it doesn't hurt so if it is what you need...continue. He stopped. He wants nothing more than to satisfy me as I do him. Communication is key.
 
Hi I just want everyone to know there are many ways to make a girl squirt. G spot stimulation often results in more fluid being released but not always. I polish my pearl all the time and it makes me squirt fairly often :)
 
I often experience ejaculation without orgasm when my g spot is stimulated.... Does anyone else experience this ? I rarely orgasm from only vaginal stim and only I have been able to do this for myself
 
Perpetual Indulgence said:
I said that does nothing for me BUT it doesn't hurt so if it is what you need...continue.
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this is my mentality when I let my boyfriend play out his forced orgasm fantasy on me. While it is uncomfortable, it can be a turn on to be degraded and completely taken over by him, and it feels good to indulge his fantasies like he does mine sometimes. And this isn't an issue every time we have sex, it started when I asked him to tie me up and dominate me. It was a lack of communication really, I was expecting extreme penetration and he had other ideas. When I ask him to stop, he does. I try to endure it because it's degrading and weirdly exciting for me. I was mostly curious whether any other women have experienced this feeling, if it's normal, and whether it is even possible to force an orgasm. I try to endure it because I'm hoping my SO is right, and it can result in powerful orgasms. However, I get exhausted and too sore before that can happen. Rakeone, or anyone else with experience in forced orgasms- is the feeling I described normal, do any women enjoy it, and is this the "right" way to force orgasms?
And just a note- my boyfriend is decidedly NOT an asshole, if I told him it hurts he stops immediately. when I complained he asked me, very concerned, if he was hurting me. I told him no, it's just really intense. He told me he's seen girls orgasm in porn from that kind of stimulation, I told him porn was staged but decided to let him try it. if I flatly say NO he respects that.
 
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