For anyone who may need to hear it.

[TheUltimateFixx]

1. Doing drugs or drinking isn't inherently bad.
2. You are not fundamentally flawed.
3. You are not 'diseased'.
4. Your brain isn't broken.
5. You are not weak or 'powerless'.
6. Abstinence vs addiction is a false dichotomy. Moderation is possible.
7. Abstinence without conflict / deprivation is likewise possible.
8. It's not a matter of will but of perspective ; and you CAN change your perspective.
9. Cravings don't have to last forever.
10. It doesn't have to be a 'lifelong struggle'.
11. Over 95% of individuals who ever fit the category of 'addict' get over their problems long-term. Every statistic is in your favour.
12. Subjective experience doesn't equal objective reality. No matter how driven and obsessed you feel, no drug owns you.

 

[F.U.B.A.R.]

I agree with most of this, except for 2,3,4,5.

I am that flawed, diseased, broken, weak and powerless individual. Had to accept it years ago...

 

[TheUltimateFixx]

I agree with most of this, except for 2,3,4,5.

I am that flawed, diseased, broken, weak and powerless individual. Had to accept it years ago...

Oh, I was all those things at some point. But I never 'accepted' it.

I'm not saying none of us ever get that bad. I did. What I'm SAYING is that none of us is DEFINED by how we are when we're at our very worst.

And that precisely is my massive beef with all of 'recovery / therapy culture', because they will keep you pinned to that worst point in your life and proclaim it your everlasting destiny, INSTEAD of giving you truly helpful strategies to move BEYOND your troubles.

I struggled longer and harder than I ever needed to by being fed that type of rhetoric. I've known others who took their own lives because they couldn't deal with the mantra of 'either deprive yourself of the only thing that keeps you going or resign yourself to jail / institutions / death' fuckery.

PS in other words there's a difference between acknowledging you're weak / broken etc IN THE MOMENT vs buying into the concept that you're like that CONSTITUTIONALLY and will be this way FOREVER.

 

[F.U.B.A.R.]

Oh, I was all those things at some point. But I never 'accepted' it.

I'm not saying none of us ever get that bad. I did. What I'm SAYING is that none of us is DEFINED by how we are when we're at our very worst.

And that precisely is my massive beef with all of 'recovery / therapy culture', because they will keep you pinned to that worst point in your life and proclaim it your everlasting destiny, INSTEAD of giving you truly helpful strategies to move BEYOND your troubles.

I struggled longer and harder than I ever needed to by being fed that type of rhetoric. I've known others who took their own lives because they couldn't deal with the mantra of 'either deprive yourself of the only thing that keeps you going or resign yourself to jail / institutions / death' fuckery.

PS in other words there's a difference between acknowledging you're weak / broken etc IN THE MOMENT vs buying into the concept that you're like that CONSTITUTIONALLY and will be this way FOREVER.

Even though I'm well aware of my faults and weaknesses, I ain't gonna let the bastards grind me down.

 

[TheUltimateFixx]

Even though I'm well aware of my faults and weaknesses, I ain't gonna let the bastards grind me down.

Exactly.

And when I tell people they are not weak, I DON'T mean a person can't be weak, or feel weak, at any given moment.

What I'm telling them specifically is that their momentary desire for drink or drugs DOESN'T constitute some fundamental unique 'weakness' or basic character flaw which so-called 'normal people' haven't got.
Because that's simply not the case and it is self-sabotage to believe that.