I should begin this story with a bit of background. I am now 20, was 19 when this trip happened and am fairly experienced with opiates (all pharmaceutical, not H). I am 175-180 pounds, 6'1 athletic and in good shape. My tolerance is about 30 mg Oxy to get me off, 100 morphine for solid nod.
It was late October and me and my friend K had just discovered fentanyl. I had a large supply (which I will not say how I got) of duragesic patches that were 25mg and 100mg. Probably close to 20 of the 25mg and 15 of the 100mg. I read on bluelight how to smoke it off foil so I gave it a go one night with K. We loved the instant sedation!!! We were using about 1 patch in one night, once a week. Now we are both in University and live together in the same apartment. He is a bit heavier than me but did not have as much of a tolerance to opiates as I did. This use continued and my tolerance slowly rose to me being able to do a patch in one night over 2 hours or so. I was still only using occasionaly but when I do drugs I like to push the limits. I had never OD'd or even come close but I like nodding.
Its now late November and Saturday morning. The night before we went out for another buddies birthday and went clubbing. I was not hung over in the morning but I had left my bag and a sweater at A's house as did the birthday boy. I called him up and since I'm the only one of my friends who has a car I went and picked him up. When I arrived at his place my other friend, lets call him Jamaal, had slept over and came with us. We picked up the stuff and everything was kosher. However Jamaal had to go home and asked me to drive him to the train station thats downtown. I drive him down and he takes the train and thanks me. Unfortunately for me I have not driven around downtown very often as I'm not from this town I go to school in so I got lost. Actually I got REALLY lost and I was driving around for almost 2 hours in my BMW X5 (had to say it! 
). I am easily disturbed and upset when stuff like this happens to me. I decided that I'd snort 20mg of oxy when I get back to calm me down and make me feel better. I FINALLY managaed to get back by sheer luck and thanked God when I got back. Just as I finished railing the line of oxy I get a phone call from my sister who had come to town by train to see antoher one of her friends who goes to my school. I picked her up but I have never had a great relationship with her. I dropper her off at her friends and returned home.
When I returned I was working on a long essay that was very stressful for me and I was freaking out. This was basically the worst day of the year for me and I was very upset. My roommate K had been out for most of the day and it was around 11 o'clock at night. I was still feeling the oxy decently and decided I'd hit the fentanyl. The essay had not been going well and I decided the fentanyl would kill the pain. I busted out the foil and started hitting an opened 25 mg patch that had about half the gel left. I finished the patch and was not as high as I wanted. I opened a new 100mg patch and pushed a HUGE blob about the diameter of a penny and smoked it down. Before it fully hit me I pushed the rest of the patch out and finished it off. Now I was feeling good! Maybe a little too good. It was maybe 12:00 when I finished off and I put on some Southpark on my laptop. Shortly into the episode I started nodding off. When I would "come to" like it happens when you nod I noticed that I was not breathing. I forced myself to take a HUGE breath and continue breathing. Next thing I know I am "coming to" again and am gasping for air. This keeps going on and I have to focus on breathing to do it. I had temporarily lost the "automation" that normally happens for your breathing.
Things got worse. For the next hour I was puking more than I ever have on any substance. I was still having a great amount of trouble breathing and I prayed to God to save me and let me make it through the night. I then realized I have a lot of amphetamines that would counter effect the opiates. I popped 2 dexedrine only to immediately throw them up. I was desparate so I opened 2 other ones up and threw the beads to the back of my nose. It was not pleasant but I realized I HAD to do it to stay alive. I was nodding hard and was almost falling out of my chair. I could barely hear the south park and wanted to go to bed. I knew that I couldn't or I would die of respiratory failure. I had to stay awake. This is when K came back home around 1:30. He came in and started talking to me. Shortly after I had to puke again and excused myself to the bathroom telling him I did a bit too much fentanyl. I did not want to scare him so I made it sound like I was alright just really tired. He was in my room literally 2 minutes. After I came back from puking he was in his room and said he wanted to go to bed. So there I was in my room trying to stay awake feeling like I'm on deaths doorstep. I'm scared for my life and in my despiration I drop down and start doing pushups to get my heart beat up. After about 3 I just have no strength (usually can do 25-30) and collapse to the floor. I jump up scared I'll pass out and die right there on the floor. I sit in my chair and try to calm myself. Then the dexies started hitting. I have never felt so relieved! I was still horribly scared but I layed down on my bed. I lay awake until about 6am then felt that I could safely sleep and slept another 4 hours.
When I awoke I was a new man. My sister gave me a call asking if I could drive her back to the station and I took her. I was holding back tears on the drive and started to realize how much she loves me and I love her and how much we need each other. I usually tease her and poke fun but I was very kind to her on the drive and her to me. She had no idea what had happened the night before. I came back home and just broke down crying in my room. I called my mom later that night with whom I have a great relationship but doesn't know I use. None of my family does. Instead of telling her I almost died from drugs I told her I was almost in a "car accident". She helped me through that night and every other day of that week when I phoned her. Everything she said relating to the "car" I related to myself so it WAS very helpful. I had a new appreciation for life and was reminded of the "Saw" movie series where Jigsaw makes victims do horrible things to save themself. I understood now what it meant to have your life flash before your eyes and I was determined to live a fuller life and be better to my family. I have never been close with my sister and dad but now we are closer than we have ever been. They still don't know about my usage but I am much more responsible now. I don't come near those doses anymore and I use once a week at most. Besides you guys only two other people know what happened. It was a very upsetting experience but it was one of the most important and probably the best thing that ever happened to me. Since the incident I have tried to live my life to the fullest and am always there for my family, especially for my sister who is younger and is weak emotionally. I pray to God more often and thank him for all the blessings He has given me. I read my Bible everyday now (as opposed to every few days before when I felt like it) and am happier with my life. It definitely was the scariest thing that ever happened to me but without it I would not have as good a family life as I do now. They say what doesn't kill you makes your stronger and I understand that now. Thanks for listening guys I really appreciate it. I wish everyone on Bluelight the best and hopefully you can learn from my story! Stay safe everyone.
OC80's
