So the OP should engage in self talk to stoke up his desire as a motivational strategy to not do them.
Umm no.. not quite. He shouldn't "stoke up" anything. You just added about 70thousand words to something I didn't even say, then tried to play if off like I said it.
Read a little deeper into what I actually said.
There are people in this world w/out drug problems that get addicted. But after 6 years of time, they forget that drugs exist and get on with life.
There are people in this world WITH drug problems that get addicted. But after 60 years off them, they STILL are tempted to use. You think it really matters WHY he wants to use (his 'motivation')? And you're implying "arrogance" on my part? His motivation for using means absolutely shit. He says NOW that his motivation THEN was "self destruction" but that didn't become his motivation untill he stopped and realized that he was simply just being destructive (I'm sure when he actually started he wasn't motivated to destroy his life). And now his motivation is "growth". Watch how fast that motivation changes too.
Drug users change their motivations to use about 5 billion times in the course of a short time just so they can KEEP using.
My point is if he COULD handle life reponsibly with drugs, he can handle life responsibly w/out them. The fact he's in a such a deeply contemplative state about it, shows hes having issues living life right now w/out them. And that to me forecast more problems than less. If he didn't have a problem he'd just go get high and not make a big deal about it, instead he came here to make a thread about it and research for however long untill he decides he can really care less about what everyone says, and the only "real answer" is to just go get high and find out. So what me or you says really doesn't matter at all. Somewhere inside he has a desire to use, (otherwise this thread wouldn't exist) which predisposes him to the bias of only taking advice from people who recommend he CAN control himself. If he didn't wanna use, he'd be more likely to argue with people telling him he CAN control himself. No human can ever be completely objective about things so personally related to them.
I put down 50 bucks that within the next month he drops MDMA. Is that "arrogant" enough for you?
That seems like advising getting aroused to psych yourself up for sexual abstinence imo.
What in the WORLD are you talking about? You could also percieve that ducks are really monkeys if thats where you brain is bound to take you. Green sometimes "seems" blue, smart people sometimes seem dumb, but you definitely seem like you're not paying attention to what I said. Theres content and intent, focus on the intent. It will help you understand better.
And by the way, getting aroused to the point of orgasm is perhaps the BEST way to prep for sexual abstinence. How often do you get done jerking off (assuming your male) then think "wow I'm horny now"? Think about it.
The OP mentioned why he was contemplating using again, why does everyone assume his motivations are drastically different than what he stated? It is worth asking about his motivations but positing that any of us know his motives better than he does is comes off as pretty arrogant.
I'm sorry but you obviously are just not too sharp. His motivations don't mean a g/damn thing. I'll say it again. His motivation NOW, in reflection to his past drug use was "self destruction" but that was NOT his motivation at the present time that he was actually destroying his life. How many people say "I wanna use drugs so I can destroy my life"?
Now he wants to "grow", you think that motivation is actually going to be fullfilled? MDMA is going to make him "grow"? WHO THE HELL invents these ideas? You "grow" by eating, shitting, going to work and living a normal life. Drugs (the drugs he mentions) have NOTHING to do with the growth process till some idiot drug addict told and wrote that he "grew" on drugs. Show me what biology book you read in highschool that says "mdma helps people grow"?
And I'm the "arrogant" one lmao!
It would be like my positing that someone was posting advocacy for abstinence because he can not stand the though of someone else succeeding in moderation and having an OK time where as he can not accomplish that. Unhelpful speculation, it would be much better for me to ask if it is possible that is a motive than state it is someone's motive.
Now aren't YOU assuming MY "motivations"? You are all over the place with your contradictions.
I HOPE he "succeeds" in moderation, really.. I do. I don't believe in NA or AA myself. They essentially force the addict identity onto everyone, addicts and nonaddicts alike, and you wind up with people who were born nonaddicts now thinking if they ever use again its over.. which creates the behavoirs of an actual addict.
So obviously NA/AA is fundamentally flawed. If you believe everything they say you're an addict no matter what. Its a terrible form of brainwashing. I also see people going to NA and getting worse over time because of this. They hear "once and addict always an addict" SO MANY friggn times over the years that they REALLY start believing they're an addict.. and they really start to act like it to (by relapsing 40 times a week).
I'm basing my decision to tell him not to use MDMA or whatever else is gonna help him "grow" on the fact that he had to come here first to get approval that hes really not a drug addict. NA already seems to have brainwashed him a fair deal. But the fact still exists that he DOESN'T KNOW what he is. He's NOT SURE if he can control himself.
So based on that I will attempt to be as objective as I can.
First, it does NOT matter if you ARE or ARE NOT an "addict". You could be addicted to heroin for 30 years and still not be an addict. You only are what people tell you you are, and you only are what you come to believe you are. I DO believe someone can learn to control themself, the same way they can unlearn to control themself.
The only reason I advise him not to, is because people with a history of drug abuse *usually tend to repeat those those behavoirs. Is there a 49% chance he won't? Maybe, but at this point he's basically thowing his life on a roulette table and hoping it doesn't land on "addicted".
Whats more than being an addict or nonaddict is KNOWING YOURSELF. I don't really care which one he is as much as I care how much he truely knows the person he is. And the fact is heuristics have just as much, if not more to do with someones habits than their nature.
Example: Do I think I'm an addict? No, after 3 wds from opiates and 1 bad speed habit I still don't think so. But, there still remains the concept of heuristics.
I started drinking socially just like he is now. I VERY MUCH told myself I'm fine, I have the self control and I KNOW IT (which we never really can know we can only think we know). But still, I genuinely believe if opiates weren't so easily available to me in the form of online opium pods, I prob STILL would just be socially drinking and smoking pot from time to time.
I can't imagine what I could have possibly gotten addicted to besides pods, they were new to me, and I was naive, even after all my past shit.
The heuristics of his current life will have A LOT to do with the end result, not just his nature.
He appears to like MDMA, I don't think MDMA is that addictive at all personally. And he sounds smart enough in this thread to completely control his use. I'm more worried about what hasn't happened yet and what he doesn't know can happen.
Like a drug becoming available to him that hes naive about, he doesn't understand how addictive it really is, and he gets hooked. It happens. I'm only recommending he tries to live clean, but maybe using MDMA every now and then sensibly will have some functional purpose in his life... maybe. Maybe it won't.
Ultimately at this point it doesn't seem like he can know untill he tries. Which goes along with the whole idea that learning who you are is more important than blindly throwing labels on yourself to avoid what you fear most. So against all professional advise, I DO actually advocate he tries. I feel much more wholesome telling him not to, but realistically he just appears that he HAS TO KNOW what type of person he is, almost more than he wants to get high. I know the point he's at and I can't tell him either way how it will end. But if it turns ugly, that will simply be the price he pays to know himself. So either way, realistically speaking, it can turn out good or bad. If I was the OP I'd simply ask myself "what do I REALLY want to do"? If he wants to go use MDMA than GO USE IT.
You will def figure out what kind of control you have with that specific drug. But I'd still recommend he stays away from things like meth/amphetamines (not methyldioxymethamphetamines), opiates, and barbituates. Sometimes it doesn't matter if you are or aren't a drug addict because a certain drug is so damn strong it will overtake almost everyone. All he can do is exercise his wisdom the best he can, and all we can REALLY DO is just wish him luck.
With that said.. good luck! I'm taking my arrogant ass out of here.
I have said my peace and will no longer read this thread. What happens, happens. But shit usually happens...'nuff said ![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
