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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards

Ever have a sobering moment...

K'd-OUT-in-AZ

K'd-OUT-in-AZ

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 11, 2008
Messages
5,769
Location
Somewhere between Eden and North Utopia. Somewhere
For instance when I was 19 I had a little methamphetamine "phase" for like four months. I was doing all kinds of other drugs as well like downers for comedowns and marijuana/psychedelics...a lot of Ketamine also. Well anyway, one day while working at WalMart (I was 19) my mom and sister stopped by to say hi and I couldn't respond. I knew that they knew I was using. I looked like shit and I realized how emotionless I had been to everyone, I wanted to cry but I just couldn't. A day later after picking up a gram of meth I call my friend up and while talking we both decided I should just toss it and I did, down the curb sewer. We agreed never to use again and I've never used meth since. I think we both felt guilty for who we had become.

So anybody ever have a moment when they decided to sober up, even if for just a little while? What was it? Like to hear some stories.
 
i have in the past and am planing on quiting the dreded oc soon.........u got it rite i hate and cant belive who ive become i dont lie steal or anything but im just not me anymore def no emotiond like u said except sadness it seems.it feels like ive lived 2 lives or something and never would have guessed id be where im at........long story short it sucks balls to anyone new to drug use please read some posts on here do your research and stick with the soft stuff........bc head my warning if u do decide to go to the side of addiction in a few years youll be the one feeling like a pos and riting the same thing..........take care.
 
wow you are deff. a baby... you just throw the meth out the end. Lol, talk to a real drug user next time.
 
Yes it is good to hear from you K'd always been one of my favorite bluelighters. For me it was last year when I was addicted to heroin I made a sign and pretended to be homeless to get cash for smack. so im standing there on the side of the road at an intersection and this lady gives me 20 dollars and sincerly seemed concerned for me I felt about 6 inchs tall I decided that day to get on suboxone. I have relapsed a few times since then but have never sank that low again.
 
crimsonjunk said:
Yes it is good to hear from you K'd always been one of my favorite bluelighters. For me it was last year when I was addicted to heroin I made a sign and pretended to be homeless to get cash for smack. so im standing there on the side of the road at an intersection and this lady gives me 20 dollars and sincerly seemed concerned for me I felt about 6 inchs tall I decided that day to get on suboxone. I have relapsed a few times since then but have never sank that low again.
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about 6 months ago...I getting off the interstate in west St. louis, MO(city) and this girl was there just like that....

I was taking my grandma to costco to get her monthly items since she is to old to carry the heavy stuff...but the thing I noticed...her teeth were fucking perfect white..I was like wtf is this shit.

I asked her how she had perfect teeth and being homeless...she said they were dentures..I was like your a fucking scam artist...

I said I am calling 911 and telling them a women is out here scamming money for drugs.

she looked scared as fuck all of a sudden and walked back to here bucket and sign and picked them up and then this dude that was hiding under the overpass wearing a polo walked out and said come on lets fucking go now.

I never called the popo but that was an eye opener to me.
 
About almost 2 years ago (my oh my how fast time goes by as you get older) I took a bottle of DXM and was feelin pretty fucked up, and the only reason why I did it is because I had no weed or other drugs, and I felt like a fucking idiot when I came off of it, thinking I was in high school again just always trying to stay high.

I had 1 pill of mdma, a VERY good pill that I was saving and tossed it down the toilet, saying Im going to stop doing drugs.

Of course I continued to roll after this, but I cut back none of the less.

Nowadays I just smoke weed, take my addys (for add but I use them for a buzz too but never over the top) and take benzos for the comedown.

I still drink but not as much.

The point is I quit all drugs that I was doing constantly (mdma, meth, ketamine, LSD, hydrocodone, hydromorophone, 2c-i) and am feeling alot better. Drugs take such a toll its not even funny.
 
Lord said:
wow you are deff. a baby... you just throw the meth out the end. Lol, talk to a real drug user next time.
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To a real drug user? I've been using drugs probably a decade longer than you've been. Not that its something to be proud of. I was talking about a sobering moment. Its true, I was never real hardcore into meth though. Doesn't take long for it to make you turn to crap though. I never felt so shameful after using any other drug other than meth...even from years of a hardcore heroin habit. And that's saying something.
 
heh...this past two weeks, ive missed every monday and friday class cause i was partying thursdays (no class) and sundays....drink, coke, and acid...yeah, im not drinking this week...until friday!! but none on sunday
 
crimsonjunk said:
Yes it is good to hear from you K'd always been one of my favorite bluelighters. For me it was last year when I was addicted to heroin I made a sign and pretended to be homeless to get cash for smack. so im standing there on the side of the road at an intersection and this lady gives me 20 dollars and sincerly seemed concerned for me I felt about 6 inchs tall I decided that day to get on suboxone. I have relapsed a few times since then but have never sank that low again.
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Well its good to hear that your doing a little better at the least. Steps...
 
I was a little out of it back then. True, sober is the way to go. But once u realize that caffeine is not LSD baby u never go back. I.e 10 years is only worse than one year most of the time. Some1 wh1 used acid for a year, they are brave.
 
K'd-OUT, I had an experience like that with adderall one time. It all started out with good intentions, I was just taking it for school and everything was going well. Eventually though I got hooked to the rush it gave me and the dose I was taking wasn't enough to make me feel it anymore. Started taking more and more and actually got to the point where I took so much I OD'd on it (I know, rare to OD on adderall but I did.. you can OD on just about anything if you take enough of it). I remember sitting in the hospital and just said, "screw it im done taking anything to get high from now on, it's not worth it."

That pretty much did it for me, and all I take now is kpin for anxiety and haven't even thought about trying to abuse it. I don't even smoke or drink anymore, at least not for now or for the near future that I can see.
 
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Dubmeister said:
I want out so badly. Im scared everyday. I can't just walk away with nothing.
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I abused drugs heavily for a year and I felt the same way. Suicide is not the way... Quitting is. These days I take lower doses and/or mostly at night instead of all day, and even this helps. It went from being like a horror movie to just kind of unpleasant. It's part of the fun of drugs ;) . If you've got speed and a boner. Otherwise I don't advise drug use the way you've been doin it
 
I spent like 3 days straight smoking DMT (with sleep) and after most of the trips I'd think wow this is fucked up and I'm so done with drugs. Then I'd go for a jog and enjoy life for a bit and smoke again lmao.

I've had a lot of "sobering moments" but none of them lasted very long.
 
Actually, just recently I did. I decided to cut back my opiate use... Of course I take my shit for pain but I will only be getting high on weekends for now. There is a fork in the road... I can go towards the light or to a dark place.. I decided to avoid the dark place.

Years ago with coke I almost died... sobered me up pretty fast.... I have had quite a few!
 
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