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Entering a FWB situation with a married man - tips?

Kid Amine

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 24, 2012
Messages
601
Here's the short of it: im bi, he's bi, his wife knows and is okay with him having a man on the side (and knows about me). that said, I've never been in a relationship where I am second fiddle. There is a possibility of three-way action, but for now, I need tips on how not to fuck things up lol. He's not out, so obviously discretion is key. We dont seem to have any friends/co-workers in common, so that part should be easy. Im pretty comfortable with being a part-time thing here because his wife knows - guys that cheat on their gf or wife just dont sit well with me, tho i do understand that not every gf/wife is going to accept their man sucks dick or likes guys. what tips do you all have for me, and any pitfalls to avoid?

I would say there is 0% chance of him leaving his wife or kids for me, and the same 0% chance of me becoming too involved or clingy. Hell, it might not happen at all, tho I would at least like to talk to him to have another bi friend irl.

thoughts?
 
How long have you known him? Have you met his wife yet? Any other common interests besides the enjoyment of kissing boys and girls? :P

I simply recommend getting to know him better. If he decides to charge into it and you're okay with that then by all means, but the last thing you want is to go through with it too fast and find out in a week that the wife changed her mind. Or worse; that she or him (or both) break down because they weren't ready. If you give it a bit of time, maybe meet the wife, you'll get to examine their level of comfort regarding the situation.

Things can turn around really fast too though without warning.

I was friends with a couple; the man was bi-curious and had a pretty big crush on me. For the longest time the 3 of us (and my now-ex gf) talked about him and I doing things together. His GF seemed okay with it completely and even encouraged it.
One night me and my GF had a nasty fight and I ended up staying the night at their place. I ended up sucking his dick; part out of spite for my ex, part cause we had wanted to for a really long time but I was always afraid of my ex.
It was pretty damn awesome ;3 I'm getting horny thinking back on it.. If I hadn't immediately afterwards felt such a terrible sense of guilt(For "cheating" on my GF. We "broke up" in our fight but I still felt bad. I even told her the next day.), I would have wanted to do so much more..
Oh yea my point; later when his GF woke up, we told her. She was like "K whatever, at least you didn't wake me up."
only a few hours later she was texting me, demanding an apology for betraying her in her own apartment. She basically had said just days before "Any time you boys feel like doing boy stuff, just do it!"
Both her and my own xGF are very mentally unstable people; basically worse case scenarios.

I've also had an issue with an awkward 3rd person.
Provided 3somes ensue; the most irritatings thing I had to deal with when we attempted to bring in a 3rd person was his inability to understand/read when he needed to give me and my partner space/alone time
AND
He only seemed interested in one of us. (my gf, even though he said he wanted to try stuff with men)
 
Work out if its just going to be a sex thing or a friendship where you both hang out together (not having sex) - if you become friends then retain some emotional distance as the line could get a bit clouded.
 
Both my husband and I maintain some FWB's, have for years and there is nothing wrong with it as long as you have the consent of your partner.
 
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