Emptiness is a lone junkie

[carbonhalo]

In college it wasn't hard to find drug culture, but in midlife it seems way harder.
Some contributing factors.
I'm a bit autistic.
I now live in the country....in the middle of a forest with no neighbours.
I have no postal delivery.
I have a security clearance.
Dark web ordering is problematic.

I am completely reliant on prescription meds and whatever I can grow and process.
I know 2 other people on the medical marijuana program...I get to smoke with them occasionally.
My partner seems to have "grown up" and no longer indulges in...well...anything, and disapproves of most of my intake.

On the plus side....I get a gram and a half of Oxycodone for about *snip* every month.
Weed and opium is free.

Even when my partner travels interstate I never get lonely despite long periods alone. But I do feel isolated from my chosen culture(s)
I grew up as a punk and a drug fiend.

This year I had to revitalise my weed seed as my stock was getting harder to sprout.
A friend in the city gave me a few clones to cross fertilise, which I grew in an isolated enclosure half a mile from my crop along with a male culled from the crop. Unfortunately critters trashed the breeders and reduced the harvest considerably. (Despite sheep mesh and 6' barb)
But it was still successful, so I now have hybrid seeds of my original stock (20 year old skunk) with "AK47", "Cheese" and "Aussie blue"
I have acquired a variety of poppy seeds to grow (although I suspect I will never plant the Tasmanian bracteatas)
If I can gather enough latex I will extract the morphine and attempt to monoacetylate it.

Annoyingly...my bees fertilised the earliest branches of my smoking crop.

I'm guessing I maintain my disconnection because the only thing I despise more than humans is myself.
Anyone identify with that lot?

 

[FuckinAcidMan]

I'm pretty impressed man, sounds like you've gotten the self sufficiency thing down but it's lonely not having anyone to share it with as your partner doesn't use?

Just making sure I caught your drift.
I like weed and opiates. The only thing you're missing is something to wake you up or make patterns materialize, lol.
Ever consider growing your own mushrooms?

Edit: Wait I think I recognize you as the guy who recently claimed to be immune to psychedelics, nevermind then, lol

 

[carbonhalo]

I did turn my hand to growing mushies once... Salvia divinorum too. Until I realised they didn't work on me.
I never did find a source for peyote cactus (apart from the one growing in the nature strip of the local post office. The poor thing was so heavily taxed....then one day it was gone)

 

[swilow]

You can get San Pedro cactus varieties in Aus very easily...

 

[LucidSDreamr]

In college it wasn't hard to find drug culture, but in midlife it seems way harder.
Some contributing factors.
I'm a bit autistic.
I now live in the country....in the middle of a forest with no neighbours.
I have no postal delivery.
I have a security clearance.
Dark web ordering is problematic.

I am completely reliant on prescription meds and whatever I can grow and process.
I know 2 other people on the medical marijuana program...I get to smoke with them occasionally.
My partner seems to have "grown up" and no longer indulges in...well...anything, and disapproves of most of my intake.

On the plus side....I get a gram and a half of Oxycodone for about *snip* every month.
Weed and opium is free.

Even when my partner travels interstate I never get lonely despite long periods alone. But I do feel isolated from my chosen culture(s)
I grew up as a punk and a drug fiend.

This year I had to revitalise my weed seed as my stock was getting harder to sprout.
A friend in the city gave me a few clones to cross fertilise, which I grew in an isolated enclosure half a mile from my crop along with a male culled from the crop. Unfortunately critters trashed the breeders and reduced the harvest considerably. (Despite sheep mesh and 6' barb)
But it was still successful, so I now have hybrid seeds of my original stock (20 year old skunk) with "AK47", "Cheese" and "Aussie blue"
I have acquired a variety of poppy seeds to grow (although I suspect I will never plant the Tasmanian bracteatas)
If I can gather enough latex I will extract the morphine and attempt to monoacetylate it.

Annoyingly...my bees fertilised the earliest branches of my smoking crop.

I'm guessing I maintain my disconnection because the only thing I despise more than humans is myself.
Anyone identify with that lot?

I haven’t used drugs with another person besides weed in like ten years.

Ppl die or get clean that I used with while younger. The ppl that keep using like myself don’t really see drug use as fun anymore or a social or celebratory thing to be shared with others…addiction becomes about just escaping your own pain and misery …so nobody really wants to be around that or share it with others

Also when ppl are older and have jobs and families they prefer to use drugs in secret because they have more to lose if they get caught or in drug friend drama