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(Ecstasy) First time: The rave turned AGAINST me

IIRandomHeroII

Bluelighter
Joined
Dec 26, 2010
Messages
76
Location
Texas
First of all let me say this happened In November 2010, so I only have approximate time frames and I'll try to recall the events as best as possible.

My friend and I decide to attend a fairly good sized EDM concert (around 4000 people).

This is my first time ever doing anything more than smoking weed (and even then I had only smoked 8-10 times). I will also say that I do not take any medication, I'm a very happy person, and I am in no way depressed about anything.

7pm-Arrive at location. We immediately drop one decent pill (being more experienced now, I would now guess around ~70mg of MDMA). At the time I didn't know not to eat right before dropping so I had just eaten a large meal. At this point, I feel no anxiety, I'm excited, I'm ready for this to kick in.

I feel nothing for 2 hours. I attribute this to the food in my stomach.

8pm-take another of the same pill. Still feeling nothing, enjoying the music, but I always have even without drugs.

9pm-My friend and I go buy an energy drink and agree that we are upset that we may have gotten bunk pills.

9:10-Maybe 10-15 minutes later after drinking the energy drink, We are both rolling within 5 minutes of each other. I've never felt this feeling before. There is almost no come up, in a matter of 5-10 minutes I have gone from feeling nothing to eye wobbles, complete euphoria and I'm peaking. I'm rolling extremely hard for 2 hours. My friend and I walk around talking to everyone in sight, I have found a new appreciation for lights, glow sticks, menthol, and cigarettes. In my phone I write a note to myself: "This isn't a rave, but a circle of friends who haven't been introduced yet, all brought together through music."

Then the weirdest/worst moment I have ever had while rolling(and I should note that another time, I was with a girl who broke her leg dancing when we were all rolling):

11:00-I'll try and describe the feeling as best as possible, but all of a sudden the music seems to be muffled, the lights aren't a bright, people seem to be avoiding me like I have leprosy, and I feel like no one wanted me to be there. It was the worst feeling I have ever felt in my life. I tell my friend I need to leave. I want to go home, curl in a ball under my covers and hide from anyone and everyone. I need to go to sleep and I regret ever doing this.

11:05-Apparently that moment lasted only a few minutes (my friend tells me), but it felt like an hour.

Then, all of a sudden a guy I had met earlier in the night (we became very good friends after this) sees us again. My friend tells him the situation and he gives me a light show. I suddenly snap out of this terrible feeling. I think to myself: "A complete stranger has just spent time helping me out. Maybe people do want me here?" Now, I want to dance, go talk to girls, and have fun again. I feel like the sun has just come out behind stormy clouds and winter has turned into spring.

The rest of the night was fantastic, I had the time of my life. Met so many people that I'm still friends with. The night eventually came to an end about 3am. I felt relaxed at that point, had a beautiful afterglow, and went to bed easily without taking/smoking anything.

The next day, I drove 6 hours back to college. I felt like the grass was more green, music sounded more beautiful, and had a generally better appreciation for everything.

All in all, it was a beautiful experience, but those 5 minutes I will never forget for as long as I live. I have rolled several times since that night and never had a bad experience like those few short minutes.
 
Interesting effects. I've definitely had moments of paranoia and fear on mdma before. Actually, my first time involved a freak paranoid episode which lasted a few minutes.
 
Glad you had fun, don't abuse the shit man. Ecstasy is a beautiful thing if you treat it with respect!
(Unless of course this was a while ago and you already know this ;))

Woops just read the top where you said this was in November 2010, seeing as you're still fairly new to it, I'll still leave my message there hahaha. xD
 
It's a fantastic drug that I've also treated with a lot of respect. In just my short time becoming familiar with the drug, I've seen what it can do to people both good and bad.

I've embraced the good that has come out of my experiences with it. I drink much less, have become closer to my family and friends, find that I appreciate seemingly insignificant things more than I used to, and I get frustrated/upset much less.
 
Sounds like you had a panic attack for a few mins for some reason

I think you have have been right. I've never had one before sober or not so it might explain why it was so intense.

It was weird, because I experienced no anxiety when I first dropped(something many do), I was in a familiar place in my hometown, and I was with one of my best friends.

Like I said, I haven't had a feeling similar since, but I'm more knowledgeable in many aspects and I know the duration and intensity of the drug.
 
I think you have have been right. I've never had one before sober or not so it might explain why it was so intense.

It was weird, because I experienced no anxiety when I first dropped(something many do), I was in a familiar place in my hometown, and I was with one of my best friends.

Like I said, I haven't had a feeling similar since, but I'm more knowledgeable in many aspects and I know the duration and intensity of the drug.

The feeling you described in that 5 minutes sounds exactly what happens to me for the full duration if i have piperazines. I get paranoid, scared, and a complete mess. It is really horrible and the first time it happened to me it nearly put me off pills completely, thats how bad it was. I have never had a similar reaction with mdma though
 
Sounds like a typical bad reaction to the rolling experience. I personally don't care for rolling, for me it's all about LSD. Raves, or EDM parties are the best though because everyone is there for the music, the beat, the experience. Nobody wants bad vibes, everyone is feeling good and having a good time. Any time you may feel unwanted, it's only because you're bugging or had a run in with a bad group of people. I go to raves quite often and I've yet to meet a group of ravers that didn't accept me immediately and just embrace the love we are all sharing for the music.

Since this was in November, I'd imagine you've had some better experiences. Treat it with respect, and don't think 'Next time I'll do 2, then 3, then 4' cause that's just getting wreckless. Nobody really needs more than one roll, just gotta keep you're tolerance down.
 
Sounds like you had a panic attack for a few mins for some reason

common coming up -energy drinks make this wayyyy more likely as do come ups that floor you out of the blue while doing something stressfull.

nothing quite like thinking drugs are bunk and then getting blown away, so much more appreciated.

mdma is still a stimulant and at high enough doses all stimulants can be anxiety inducing and mentally unpleasant. maybe you were picking up an unfriendly atmosphere at the time tho. also could have been a really bad tune for you mindstate. its still a trip
 
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