E has ruined me

[lovepsychadelics]

I did E 10 times in 7 months more or less, 200mgs doses, 3 weeks space, tested (IM STUDYING CHEMISTRY)...the last time i just got a comedown, from there i try HARD to go out. have symptons like:
-NO memory, i actually cant remember the first 7 months after my comedown
-No inteligence, i couldnt pass any of my exams, along 1 year
-Hands and body trembling, like parkinson, i had it for 18 months, 1 month and it dissapeared
-social phobia, sadness
-Bruxism, day and now only night, still here at night but much better (for this i take medication, and i guess the medication is healin in some way my brain too...still not sure, i should wait)
-akathisia first 4 months


How i manage? how im doing? DIET and WORKOUT my best friends....i change form month 9 and 15 mostly so i GUESS that healing is not a constant and it is related with my habits, this months i change my diet and my sport, f.example i didnt drink alcohol as i used to (i become sensitive to drugs from booze to weed) and eat veggies fruits and kind of paleo diet. Im too into adaptogens to improve my waveform anxiety, the thing that change me the most for long term was rhodiola rosea....still tryin being my own guinea pig, but i have had some sucess in my own healing xperiments, PM me if needed

This sounds very familiar to my own experience with HEAVY MDMA abuse. The healing process lasted 2 years. Basically get active just do something anything. Splat paint on some paper, ride a bike, kick something, get a punching bag and beat the shit out of it until your knuckles bleed or alternatively buy some gloves as well, swim, walk just get out and do shit. Does not matter if you don't enjoy it the activity will kick start some brain chemistry and you will GRADUALLY feel better. Get out side and get some D vitamin from the sun.

Eat as healthy as you can. Multi-vitamins and supplements can help but activity is the key. After my MDMA abuse I got back into skateboarding and surfing. I only skate these days despite living 5 minutes from the ocean... dunno I just enjoy the challenge of weight distribution, body position etc to achieve that elusive trick and then nailing it and riding away clean feels so fucking good! I do go for the occasional paddle but surfing on a tiny Island the wave has so much more power and water moving than surfing off the coast of a large country, that and reefs...

 

[Worth]

yeah anti depressants are not for me or anyone else. Anti depressants turn you into a sexless, not interested, zombie. Anti depressants ruined me

 

[Worth]

Odd that Effexor and E are sometimes both called E... and apparently sometimes they leave people the mess up in the same way ... from what you say. Seems the same to me if you are going to see a shrink.. don`t take effexor as it seems to cause the same type of problems you have from the other E ... it is not just myself saying it either that are a lot of people who have these same type issues after stopping Effexor so if you do see a shrink... and hey who am I to say but I will never see one again...
don`t take that one is my advice.
There are some good doctors but even they don`t know what the hell is going on with these drugs... the information is corrupted according to this doc who was trying to find out what drugs to give to his patients... he calls it research misconduct... no less. Give it a look if you like.
http://www.ted.com/talks/ben_goldacre_what_doctors_don_t_know_about_the_drugs_they_prescribe.html

Think he wrote a book too... see the reasons it is not always the doctors fault... there has to be a better way...

It's the medications fault. I blame the medication. Since i didn't touch anything until after. When i started taking Venlafaxine that's when i had problems,,just letting everyone know,, i mean just putting this out there

 

[adastra80]

Hey,

I've had a similar experience with drugs. For years I was taking whatever came my way. I was high on something every single day. I've been diagnosed with schizophrenia and had similar feelings towards my life for a long while. I felt I had destroyed my potential.

It gets better. I have found meaning in my life again. For me, it is doing what I can to make my parents happy. Repaying my debt to them. For you, it might be something else. We might not ever be what we could have been had we not made poor choices, but I am playing the hand I've been dealt and doing my best. If I had known better, I would have done better. The same for you. It's not your fault. My advice to you: Find meaning, whatever it may be.

Hope things get better for you.