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Drugs opened up a window of perception that was better off closed

The thing is the more time you have in between trips the more new life experiences you have to reflect on and form your trip.

It makes the trip more special and in turn your life FEELS more special, important, and profound afterwards.
The mind never sees how its desire for specialness, importance and profundity makes life seem so commonplace, meaningless and mundane.

It's happy with a moment here and there of specialness, importance and profundity, even if it's only once a decade.

Well, it's *not* happy with that, is it? Because then it needs to be recaptured, and the search continues.

There's so very little happiness in the life that seeks happiness. You'd almost think seeking happiness kept it stuck with misery, eh? Pity how that's not clear unless one sees happiness to be unhappiness. All the polarities equate, in the end. Chase after one, and the other holds you captive. Run away, and the opposite of it looks so desirable.

The clearer it is that opposites complementarily equate, the clearer it is that the others one talks to are not others -- nor is the self they like speaking with, oneself.

The space they co-habitate and co-ditch, is reality.

Peace...
 
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Drug abuse usually results in the lost of "magic" and leads to misery, and that is what happened to me. Once I started feeling this way, I started to think a lot and evaluate my life and notice all the mistakes I've made in the past. All my flaws seem to become more profound. I started having trust issues when I began to question the genuineness of my friends. I pretty much saw myself as a waste of a human body. My outlook on life just became pure negativity. The drug culture looked ugly as hell. Everyone seemed fake. I felt distant and detached from everyone. I started to become extremely self-conscious.

Had this window not been opened, my mindset would've been perfectly fine.

I relate to all those details... yet I experienced it as a positive.
 
I think one of the biggest problems that a lot of people have is once that window of "something more" than what is to be seen through senses they dont know what to do with it..

For example I was always somewhat philosophical person from a very young age but was frustrated because I thought i was a weirdo couldn't make sense of my thoughts. I did LSD for the first time and everything I though before suddenly became clear. I felt my soul, a God inside myself whatever it may be and briefly stepped into another dimension and truly saw myself and the world from an outside perspective that vastly made me detatched from the world of senses.

There is a pure beauty once you stand naked before yourself and the universe.. the detatchment was almost like a warm friend. But the depression and anxiety and seeing things in the world as ugly or false because you feel that you have experienced something true! and the normal world is boring because of that.

But in reality it is the opposite. If you were permanently on a DMT trip or LSD trip you probably wouldn't enjoy it after a while.. I realized that. The sober bland normalness of the world is almost like a realm that is meant to put our senses and parts of the brain at ease, making that next trip or deep meditation even more unbelievable!

If you fully lived in the world of unimaginable there wouldn't be a imaginable world to compare it to making that world of unimaginable completely imaginable making it far less interesting!

You opened up the window, dont fear it embrace it. Try meditating try searching yourself (sober) and find what the true nature of your bad outlook on this world is. I have searched hard and am still on my search for the truth but what I have realized is..

I am going to die.

Does this world of senses truly matter at all? for me it is nothing more than a temporary state of my soul being confined in a world ruled by senses but nothing that happens here can have an effect on my true inner happiness. Let go of this attatchment to what is "real" what is "illusion"

The world is how you perceive it. I choose to believe everything that happens, happens for a reason that eventually leads to something positive and as long as my soul is happy and morale on my own standards that is truly all that matters!
 
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I have researched through my life history as a part of the beginning of the cognitive behavioral therapy and came across in many things I have realized through my life. There are not much drugs involved so if you are strict to read only drug related discoveries, skip this, but if you are interested in sober realizations and like to compare them to against drug induced I would suggest you read this.

At first when I learned to read at age of four, I literally found out different worlds I could jump in only by opening a book. That was amazing as I could open my mind simply reading and mindtravel across the worlds that did not exist in what our brains think as a normal reality.

Then came the discovery that there is not a god that created the planet and all its inhabitants at the age of six as I started reading scientific literature in forms of popular science books. That was the biggest realization I have ever had, everything deals with atoms and their sub particles which then forms molecules and molecules in a good environment leaded them to gather up as the origin of life. Life then evolves from a bacterias and such into single cell organisms etc. eventually leading up into different species including human. Also the discovery that there are other stars than the sun which nearly all might have planets and as the water and other various substances are not rare in the universe and the fact that depending the theories that there are either amount of stars greater than we can imagine or unlimited amount of them leaded in to a discovery that there most be some form of life elsewhere and that there must some form of more or less sentient beings than us.

That carried my thinking and career options through a long time. I thought that I wanted to be scientist or something like that. But while I was a teenager I get more interested in other cultures and how the rest of the world copes as I have had the change to born in a welfaresociety where there is no lack of food, shelter, education, entertainment and such things that a healthy individual needs. I wanted to be someone that can help other people and chose to study for law degree as that way I would be able to help people with many ways depending on what subject I would specialise. I was pretty much pacifist at those times too.

I studied law for a while and took part into civil associations and human right activities and then came the moment I had to choose between a army or civilian service as each adult male in our country needs to go through that. I chose army as an idealist I thought that as each male of our country has to take part in military actions, it is much harder to parliament to decide that we should start a war or start messing up with global politics as every parliament member has familymembers in army and it would therefore make things more personal when compared to a countries that have armies which consists only of the people coming from the poor parts of society.

Then I realized that the army was for me and I could serve other people as a medic in there and got stuck for a while in there and applied to ISAF operation and served there until I got wounded. I realized there that how poor situations normal people are trying to live and how rest of the world only tries to make their living even harder by going war against an ideology that exists only because there is so much unequality between people and something should be done for that.

Therefore I decided that I would go back to school for a while and do business college and then finish my law degree so I could affect to life of the people and evwntually jump into politics.

So these are some of my discoveries that I have made and they have changed the course of my life in many times. Those are based in reading and actually experiencing the world as it is. I have not had the need to use psychedelics to realize things that are important.

And how have your trips with mushrooms etc. affected your ways of perceiving things and the universe in itself and have you tried to do something in order to make world a better place after getting some "insight" from psychedelics?

I expect that not many have done anything but just in the long run got a depression when they have had enough psychotic experiences with psychedelics. I had a friend mine who after a LSD trip came to tell me that we are all part of the universe. Well that was nothing new for me :)
 
I have two points to make:

1. The knowledge that can be "discovered" with psychedelic drugs is completely impartial to human thought. It is simply knowledge. The human mind is what creates duality, and assigns labels such as positive or negative to certain ideas/truths/actions. Drug use certainly opens the mind to a broader spectrum of knowledge (not neccesarily empirical knowledge though...), but it doesn't mean that our minds can accept this knowledge in an easier way. Pain and sufferring and destruction are painful to any mind who lives an "examined life". And because of our primate tendency to detect threats above non-threats, the negative information is processed a lot quicker and exagerrated.

If you use drugs to attain knowledge (or if it just happens without your intent) you need to be able to examine that knowledge in an objective way. The shallowness of humans does not require the personal cognition that some may give it; neither does the beauty, wisdom, hatreds, petty squables. These things- that we label as good or bad- have no need to personally effect you. They just require acknowledgement.

All actions we partake in or witness can be labelled as good/evil, black/white etc. but reality isn't as starkly divided as that. Everything is on a 360 degree continuum, and WE choose where any one action/throught/word/etc. sits on that continuum.

Instead of trying to close the door, or wish you hadn't opened it, just accept that you have and try and sink deeper into the bliss of existence. The best news I ever heard was this: "There is nothing bad, nor good, in the world..." and it was my own brain telling me. :)


2. I think a lot of psychedelic/drug users don't follow up the influx of knowledge or heightened awareness of drugs. On a trip, your mind violates the boundaries of perception and is an open vessel for odd, non-linear thoughts. Once your sober again, your typically dual mind will divide this knowledge into a more easily digestible format; ie. dual, opposing meanings.

The best way to overcome this division is to acknowledge it as a non-truth, and actively continue to see past it to the actual true-Truth. I use meditation, drumming and some occult techniques to keep my mind aware and avoid the trap of duality.

I know exactly what you mean... but other than meditation, or daily micro dosing acid, how do you keep the knowledge, as well as the ability to communicate to ppl, and not be a schizo..... i try to explain these things, but it just sounds stupid out loud..... what occult tech's do you speak of? i am very interested
 
Sometimes I wonder to myself, if the roads Im running down are the best choices. They seem to open up more and more possibilites. All I know is that I am a rational person, so whatever choices I make, in the long term or short term, came from me. Therefore however things end up, I wanted it to happen that way.

Kinda a ramble there, but i think that your eyes and mind were expanded because you wanted them to be, so deal with what you need to in your own head in the present.
 
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