When I first started using drugs, it was out of experimentation, which turned to a fixation because of the incredible rushes of new feelings of euphoria tingling my virgin receptor sites.
What went from using drugs to feel good, went to using drugs to feel normal, as drugs became the only thing to do.
From this point on, my life became a disaster. Then you need the drugs. Then drugs come first. Then your life falls apart because you are holding up this pillar around you that is ripping everything away from you as you breeze past, not a care in the world.
My problem is that now, when my life is so destroyed from my drug usage, when I have lost the woman of my life because she cannot trust me anymore, is when it is the hardest time to stop. I never used drugs because I was sad. I never used drugs because I was angry. But oh boy, now I need the drugs. I think about her, I lose grip in this reality; the pain is so immense, I cannot describe it.
I am clean from heroin for 30 days; feel good. Can't stop drinking or smoking pot. At least this is good. I know know what I'm really trying to ask, i guess just looking for people who have been in similar situations and have gotten out of it (or maybe not
) or are feeling bad and need to vent.
Much love to TDS, I come and view over the posts in here quite often when I'm not feeling so hot ;( you guys help a lot though . Thanks for being here
What went from using drugs to feel good, went to using drugs to feel normal, as drugs became the only thing to do.
From this point on, my life became a disaster. Then you need the drugs. Then drugs come first. Then your life falls apart because you are holding up this pillar around you that is ripping everything away from you as you breeze past, not a care in the world.
My problem is that now, when my life is so destroyed from my drug usage, when I have lost the woman of my life because she cannot trust me anymore, is when it is the hardest time to stop. I never used drugs because I was sad. I never used drugs because I was angry. But oh boy, now I need the drugs. I think about her, I lose grip in this reality; the pain is so immense, I cannot describe it.
I am clean from heroin for 30 days; feel good. Can't stop drinking or smoking pot. At least this is good. I know know what I'm really trying to ask, i guess just looking for people who have been in similar situations and have gotten out of it (or maybe not
) or are feeling bad and need to vent. Much love to TDS, I come and view over the posts in here quite often when I'm not feeling so hot ;( you guys help a lot though . Thanks for being here
l also completley ruined my life with drugs...l am still struggling and trying to be patient. I miss my life and want it back sooo bad. It is harder to deal with everything sober. Some days l want to use so bad l can't stand it, just so l can escape the reality that l have created. I lost my boyfriend to my addiction as well, and it is the hardest thing l have ever had to deal with. But for whatever reason, this is part of our learning experience. Just think of how much more you will appreciate all the things you have lost onceyou have them back! This forum helped and is still helping me so immensely....get on here, share your experiences or just follow the experience of others, it is so niceto have people who just get what you're going through. Hang in there!
To both of you. Breakups are hard enough without drugs. Throw drugs in the mix and it can be overwhelming and confusing. You just have to keep telling yourself that by treating your addictions you are setting yourself up to be in a much better place alone or in your next relationship.
