eternalcrux
Bluelighter
Rough Draft- DPT, cannabis, salvia, clonozopam
Okay the nights a little sketchy and im still seing tracers as mky fingers dance across my keyboard so please bear with me... if i have enough ambitiontomorrow then i will edit. disclaimer: im an idiot, blah blah blah, dont eyeball chems pls kthx, etc, dont do what i did
I started the night by taking my .5 'eveniing' dose of kpin at god knows what time... all times are going to be inaccurate anyway, so just bear with me...
We all congregate at my friends, the local hangout as of late, to do what we always do- take drugs and hang out.
I start the night out by taking two blasts of some new salvia leaf, and i had the most intense salvia experience i may have ever had. I was scared to death, and convinced i was insane, that i had 'snapped' "oh No Matt, you've done it this time, you aren't comming back" ... that sort of fear set into me and it took all the willpower my brain had to remind myself that if i have faith in biology then i took a drug and i will come down...
i will attempt to describe the experience, the best i can remember it; (also please remember that all the following psychedelic experiences could have been affected [lessened, id guess] by my medecinal benzodiazapine) ::
I blew the torch lighter out and set teh bong down and by then i was entering the completely altered and strange salvia world, but never had it been this intense. I was seated at a cicrle table with freinds all around me, they all wanted to try the salvia, so they were inquisitive as to my state;
I felt an omnious impending feeling of doom, my friends questions were not making sense, and worse yet, it seemed they were conspiring against me to take more salvia. I thought as if P smoked the bong nextt, it would add to MY high, which terrified me even further. I felt controlled by my friends, and they started to leave the table, and i remember a destinct "truman show" feeling that i got from everyone, as if my reality was a complete crock of shit, and salvia was finially showing me how cruel and weird it was.
Well that experience subsided as the salvia induced states always do after a few minutes and a few bongloads. I had the most terrifing and intense salvia experience ever, but i was going to try dpt tonight again with my friends so silly me pushed the evilbadscary salvia thoughs into the back of my mind where they hid for awhile
I believed salvia was trying to show me i could not casually smoke it and expect a mild marijuana-type intoxication, and that smoking it should have a purpouse.
Well let me continue the night; a friend arrives with DPT
My friend eyeballed for me (please dont flame) two 20mg-ish piles which i insuffulated, followed by what i think was probably another 20-30 ( really i have no fucking clue, mg scale didn't come yet ;/ ) an hour after my first dose. My friends were given dosages, (yet smaller ones, their first times); and we began our dpt experience... all 4 of us that dosed (while soemone else smoked so much salvia in the other room he had OBEs and experienced complete ego-dissillusion [i believe, the way he described the experience]) and were all educated by yours truly to the best of my ability about DPT as well as by our myseterious friend who had more firsthand knowledge.
I noticed the tryptamine feeling after around 10 minutse or so... but nothing much, jsut the same type of feeling you get when you come up on shrooms... but it was building so it was okay... and my previous DPT experience i didn't start SERIOUSLY TRIPPING until a redose. So fastfoward to my redose an hour later.
I insuffulate my "booster" and in about ten minutes i am completely tripping again, pleasently, like my previous experience. I am aware of this because i start to see people's "auroas" again then the visuals and patterns begin to increase. This grows stronger until i have reached slightly less of a peak then my previous experience. I was again experiencing the world moment by moment,instant by instant. I have yet to experience a negative effect from either trip.
I spend a large portion of my trip on the couch with my girlfriend, and i loved every moment of it. Her essence, her personality, and the best hand massage ive ever had kept us there until all my friends disasppeared into the other room to smoke more salvia. Remembering my previous experience with salvia that night, and how terrifying it was,, plus not wanting to leave my girl for anything kept me on the couch.
We heard laughing fits for fifteen minutes straight and i laughed as well, because i've knowwn those guys so long, and i knew what they were experiencing, knew how fucking crazy and loopy and hysterical they felt, and i wanted to join them and roll around on the floor and laugh (plus i'd wanted to try dpt+salvia combo) so eventually we both were lured back into the salvia smoking room.
I should have fucking learned the first time: I take two more huge blasts of this new salvia leaf from the bong, laying on my friends bed on my back, slightly afraid of what might happen. The bong was taken from me, and before i knew it the celing opened up and my body, along with the body of my friends, were all zippered together and being pulled upwards; i panicked, i must have lurched foward, which prob increased the feeling of being plulled into this unknown plane above the house.
My friends were lauging at me hysterically, and again, as i felt my body being ripped apart by these imaganiry gears hooked up to my zippered body, panicking and unable to communicate, i felt as if they were all in on one giant conspiracy against ME. I felt like i WAS on soemthing as twisted (but sicker, the hell of my mind) version of the truman show..
My friends bodies were half zippered away too, and i thought i heard voices telling them to distract me (their half=visibal bodies) from finding otu soemthing (at the tiem i was under the impression that my whole sense of reality was a crock of shit, and that this hell parlor of a nightmare where i got bound up by cranks was reality) about myself, or my life/world. I ended up comming down next to my girlfriend, in her arms.
I shouldn't have disrespected salvia. I should not have smoked it in the early night just "to get fucked up a little" and later i should not have smoked it " to join in my friends jovial rich laughter". I hope i can remember these lessons, because i never want to have to be taught them again. Salvia is NOT a drug you do to g3t h1gH oN D00dZ; i never want to feeel that terrified/helpless again.
In retrospect i am still feeling the "afterglow" effects from my dpt... ive smoked several bowls since then which has helped me feel more 'normal' actually, and i just dosed an extra .5 kpin to get me to sleep...
Maybe tomorrow i will edit; maybe not.
Okay the nights a little sketchy and im still seing tracers as mky fingers dance across my keyboard so please bear with me... if i have enough ambitiontomorrow then i will edit. disclaimer: im an idiot, blah blah blah, dont eyeball chems pls kthx, etc, dont do what i did
I started the night by taking my .5 'eveniing' dose of kpin at god knows what time... all times are going to be inaccurate anyway, so just bear with me...
We all congregate at my friends, the local hangout as of late, to do what we always do- take drugs and hang out.
I start the night out by taking two blasts of some new salvia leaf, and i had the most intense salvia experience i may have ever had. I was scared to death, and convinced i was insane, that i had 'snapped' "oh No Matt, you've done it this time, you aren't comming back" ... that sort of fear set into me and it took all the willpower my brain had to remind myself that if i have faith in biology then i took a drug and i will come down...
i will attempt to describe the experience, the best i can remember it; (also please remember that all the following psychedelic experiences could have been affected [lessened, id guess] by my medecinal benzodiazapine) ::
I blew the torch lighter out and set teh bong down and by then i was entering the completely altered and strange salvia world, but never had it been this intense. I was seated at a cicrle table with freinds all around me, they all wanted to try the salvia, so they were inquisitive as to my state;
I felt an omnious impending feeling of doom, my friends questions were not making sense, and worse yet, it seemed they were conspiring against me to take more salvia. I thought as if P smoked the bong nextt, it would add to MY high, which terrified me even further. I felt controlled by my friends, and they started to leave the table, and i remember a destinct "truman show" feeling that i got from everyone, as if my reality was a complete crock of shit, and salvia was finially showing me how cruel and weird it was.
Well that experience subsided as the salvia induced states always do after a few minutes and a few bongloads. I had the most terrifing and intense salvia experience ever, but i was going to try dpt tonight again with my friends so silly me pushed the evilbadscary salvia thoughs into the back of my mind where they hid for awhile
I believed salvia was trying to show me i could not casually smoke it and expect a mild marijuana-type intoxication, and that smoking it should have a purpouse.
Well let me continue the night; a friend arrives with DPT
My friend eyeballed for me (please dont flame) two 20mg-ish piles which i insuffulated, followed by what i think was probably another 20-30 ( really i have no fucking clue, mg scale didn't come yet ;/ ) an hour after my first dose. My friends were given dosages, (yet smaller ones, their first times); and we began our dpt experience... all 4 of us that dosed (while soemone else smoked so much salvia in the other room he had OBEs and experienced complete ego-dissillusion [i believe, the way he described the experience]) and were all educated by yours truly to the best of my ability about DPT as well as by our myseterious friend who had more firsthand knowledge.
I noticed the tryptamine feeling after around 10 minutse or so... but nothing much, jsut the same type of feeling you get when you come up on shrooms... but it was building so it was okay... and my previous DPT experience i didn't start SERIOUSLY TRIPPING until a redose. So fastfoward to my redose an hour later.
I insuffulate my "booster" and in about ten minutes i am completely tripping again, pleasently, like my previous experience. I am aware of this because i start to see people's "auroas" again then the visuals and patterns begin to increase. This grows stronger until i have reached slightly less of a peak then my previous experience. I was again experiencing the world moment by moment,instant by instant. I have yet to experience a negative effect from either trip.
I spend a large portion of my trip on the couch with my girlfriend, and i loved every moment of it. Her essence, her personality, and the best hand massage ive ever had kept us there until all my friends disasppeared into the other room to smoke more salvia. Remembering my previous experience with salvia that night, and how terrifying it was,, plus not wanting to leave my girl for anything kept me on the couch.
We heard laughing fits for fifteen minutes straight and i laughed as well, because i've knowwn those guys so long, and i knew what they were experiencing, knew how fucking crazy and loopy and hysterical they felt, and i wanted to join them and roll around on the floor and laugh (plus i'd wanted to try dpt+salvia combo) so eventually we both were lured back into the salvia smoking room.
I should have fucking learned the first time: I take two more huge blasts of this new salvia leaf from the bong, laying on my friends bed on my back, slightly afraid of what might happen. The bong was taken from me, and before i knew it the celing opened up and my body, along with the body of my friends, were all zippered together and being pulled upwards; i panicked, i must have lurched foward, which prob increased the feeling of being plulled into this unknown plane above the house.
My friends were lauging at me hysterically, and again, as i felt my body being ripped apart by these imaganiry gears hooked up to my zippered body, panicking and unable to communicate, i felt as if they were all in on one giant conspiracy against ME. I felt like i WAS on soemthing as twisted (but sicker, the hell of my mind) version of the truman show..
My friends bodies were half zippered away too, and i thought i heard voices telling them to distract me (their half=visibal bodies) from finding otu soemthing (at the tiem i was under the impression that my whole sense of reality was a crock of shit, and that this hell parlor of a nightmare where i got bound up by cranks was reality) about myself, or my life/world. I ended up comming down next to my girlfriend, in her arms.
I shouldn't have disrespected salvia. I should not have smoked it in the early night just "to get fucked up a little" and later i should not have smoked it " to join in my friends jovial rich laughter". I hope i can remember these lessons, because i never want to have to be taught them again. Salvia is NOT a drug you do to g3t h1gH oN D00dZ; i never want to feeel that terrified/helpless again.
In retrospect i am still feeling the "afterglow" effects from my dpt... ive smoked several bowls since then which has helped me feel more 'normal' actually, and i just dosed an extra .5 kpin to get me to sleep...
Maybe tomorrow i will edit; maybe not.
