eth
Ex-Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2004
- Messages
- 154
.ok, this is why you don't try to reply to an email when you're spun on meth
ur sick? i hope u get better soon sweetness. =] its ok if u don't have a favourite sport. i am not a huge fan of sport actually. now n then its good fun to have a quick game of footy or basketball with your friends. good exercise too. then again, so is dancing all nite. how do you think i stay so slim and healthy? i get plenty of aerobic exercise, but not so much anaerobic exercise. maybe i should join a gym? i want to work on my strength. and if i gain a bit of muscle i won't look so skinny, which is a good thing. hmm, better looks, increased physical strength, and better general fitness. i'll give it some serious thought! YES. good idea! exercise = better looks = more sex = more exercise = even better looks = even more sex = even more exercise = HOTNESS! whoa, i'm smart. SEXercise! *sigh* i will never be as hot as brad pitt or tom cruise.
i wish i had the money for plastic surgery but unfortunately i can hardly afford a cup of water at McDonalds! and cups of water at McDonalds are free!! speaking of macca's, don't eat any of their food at all!! it's all deadly poison! even eating a single french fry from that dreaded restaurant of evil will turn you into a fat, bald 43 year old man. and you don't even want to know what the burgers do to you!!! i'll tell you one thing though. all McDonalds food makes you fat. do you see something here? CONSPIRACY THEORY TIME... all McDonalds (EVIL corporation) food makes you fat yes? now why would they want to make you fat? think about it! they are fattening us up to use us as a cheap source of burger meat!! they are going to KILL US ALL and make burgers out of our BRAINS and our STOMACHS!!!!! but with all the humans dead (killed by the EVIL corporations) who will buy their new and improved burgers? the answer? SPACE ALIENS!! yes, aliens from outer space will invade the planet earth, attracted by the low burger prices at the planet's most popular fast food chain. soon every country worldwide will be overrun with aliens! humans will be a rare sight, only found at human farms owned by the McDonalds company (EVIL corporation). And who will be running that company now the humans are all gone? The aliens? NO. The McDonalds company will not be run by aliens, nor will it be run by humans, nor will it be run by pink bunny rabbits. The McDonalds company will be run by 'Ronald McDonald', a member of that diabolical, wicked, and EVIL race known as 'Advertising Gimmicks'. Don't go away, 'cause the worst is yet to come! Ronald McDonald is the Antichrist!!! It’s true, it’s even in the Bible. Revelation 33:12:- ‘The antichrist shall come unto the earth disguised as the Chief Executive Officer of a well known fast food chain and his given name shall begin with R and his given name shall end with D and his surname shall begin with M and his surname shall end with D and he shall be a member of the most evil race ever to grace the Planet known as Earth.” Straight from the horse’s mouth folks - THE one and only BIBLE. Now, lets analyse that verse from the holy book of God. It says the given name of the Antichrist will start with R and end with D. ‘Ronald’ matches these criteria perfectly! it says the surname of the Antichrist will start with M and end with D. No surprises here, ‘McDonald’ matches up just fine. Lastly, it is extremely well known that ‘Advertising Gimmick’ is a far more evil race than Blacks, the French, and even ASIANS. It’s very possible that ‘Advertising Gimmick’ could be the most evil race on the planet. Just a few years ago, a famous ‘Advertising Gimmick’ by the name of Joe Camel was found to be promoting the poisoning of innocent children with toxic cancer-causing leaves wrapped in paper tubes. Here’s some advice: Never trust a Black person, never trust a Frenchman, NEVER trust an Asian, and NEVER EVER EVER EVER trust an ‘Advertising Gimmick’. Their very existence is based solely around MONEY. Money is the root of all evil, therefore the entire race is EVIL and should be EXTERMINATED. The future of the planet is sounding pretty grim, isn’t it? BUT if the entire human race bands together and BOYCOTTS the EVIL CORPORATION known as McDonalds, the company will go out of business. Yes, YOU PERSONALLY can help prevent the murdering of innocent people. YOU can help save the Earth from being invaded by aliens from outer space! And YOU can help prevent the coming of the Antichrist. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, DON’T BUY, EAT, DRINK, OR EVEN TOUCH A MCDONALDS PRODUCT. The future of the human race depends on YOU. Do you want to help even more? Use the World Wide Web to find out how to build a bomb! Build a few bombs and blow up McDonalds stores! WARNING: Blowing up McDonalds stores is illegal, dangerous, and may involve coming into close proximity with McDonalds products. Be careful! And please, don’t kill innocent customers. Set off the fire alarm before detonating the bomb so all the customers evacuate and avoid being blown to smithereens. YOU CAN HELP SAVE THE WORLD. BUT HURRY!!!! We only have five years to destroy the McDonalds corporation before their evil plan comes into action. ACT NOW before its too late! Tell all your friends and family to shun McDonald’s stores like the BLACK DEATH. Stay well away from the foul-smelling dens of toxic sludge yourself. And email this notice to all your friends! Pink bunny rabbits will thank you! Power Performance Penis Pills – Lengthen your penis by 170%!!! Save your sex life! Free sample pack of VIAGRA included!!! And if you’re interested in buying 100% GENUINE SOFTWARE, we can help you! Office 2003 Professional from only $5 including postage to anywhere in the United States! or Canada!! or Zimbabwe!!!! Anyway, back to my original point. EXERCISE is beneficial to your health! It promotes healthy circulation and respiratory function. Just what a crackhead like me needs to increase his LUNG CAPACITY so he can do BIGGER BURNS. Would you like to hear a little story? No? Too bad. A few years ago, I was overweight. About 150kg overweight. And I’m not exaggerating there. One day back in mid-2002, I woke up and realised I wasn’t taking advantage of life the way I could. That day I bought my first crack pipe and 8 ball of crystal meth. A week later, I’d lost 50kg. Two weeks later, I was 75kg lighter than I’d been before I decided to make changes in my life. I kept smoking meth and I kept losing weight, but I needed to improve my general fitness if I wanted to be successful in life. I joined a gym in November 2002 and I’ve been going three times a week ever since. Before I joined that gym, I could barely lift a 5kg sack of potatoes. Now I have no trouble at all lifting motorbikes, furniture, and light aircraft. I’ve also joined the local amateur ballet club where I can flaunt my physical strength and flexibility. I’m proud of myself, not all that long ago I was a loser with nothing to live for. Now I’m good looking, strong, energetic, whoa dude. I just love myself. These days my weight remains pretty much constant at 47kg. 46kg of that is muscle. I am so attractive, I have 7 girlfriends and they like to get naked together and fool around in my office while I’m working. It makes it pretty damn hard to concentrate!! Oh I completely forgot to mention, back before I started getting my life on track I was unemployed and unskilled. Now I’m a drug dealer and I make a few hundred thousand a day. I have no trouble funding my 6 ounce per day methamphetamine habit, I’m a member of exclusive clubs with exorbitant membership fees, and I live in a $50,000,000 mansion in the nicest area of Melbourne. I turned my life around with the help of drugs, drugs, drugs, exercise, and sheer willpower! Now you can do it too! Want to be successful like me? Don’t hesitate to give me a call! Pure crystal meth only $100 a gram! 1/5 the price of our competitors! Okay now where’s my dick? Did the meth make it shrink to the size of a pea? *sigh* Wait, no. It’s still 27 inches long. Ladies love me and my Rod of God. My Pole of Soul. What am I talking about!!!? I think I had a bit too much crystal meth today... but oh well. Where’s my dick so I can have another burn? Oh, there it is, inside my pants. Hardeeharharhar!! You know what’s really gay? Two men having sex, especially anal sex. Extremely gay. But anyway, that’s irrelevant. The point is, I need an ounce of cocaine but no one can hook me up. I feel like a line of coke right now, actually. Back in a second, just calling my dealer in Colombia! He’s sending over a 747-load of plants. I’m going to try and grow them in my back yard. I can bribe the police into staying well away from my property. I will be making enough money each DAY to feed a third world country for 500 YEARS. A few measly bribes ain’t gonna hurt. Sounds like the 747 just landed on the airstrip out the back. Soon I’ll be rolling in coca plants and rolling in cash. Slave! Get your black ass here and start planting these. But first make me a gram of coke for the day!! Useless nigga... *sigh* Damn... I need coke, that stupid nigga should have finished making it by now! GRRR! I paid $10 for that slave.. Finally my coke is done.. bring it over bitch. thankyou... for being a useless nigga. *SNIFF* ok thats a gram of coke gone, about 4000000 left though, heh heh heh. who said money doesn’t grow on trees? ----5 yrs later---- ok the plants r so big and im making a few million a day off em. thanks.... fukn yes cunttttt.... fuk u make me sik u know that? i dunno bro. all i want is 10 cents and a cigarette lighter. and a ciggy. and a charge. and a few burns... fucking lost junkie cunts... *sigh*... drugs are gay like asians and french people
---
OK, I wrote this when I was spun on crystal meth. I don't know what happened... I started off writing an email to my friend but it quickly turned into some cracked out insane nonsense. I cannot believe the utter garbage my brain came up with here.
I'm a nice person when I'm straight... really.
edit: yeah the racism in here gets pretty nasty. probably against guidelines? i don't have a problem with any of the groups i insulted, this is a work of fiction.
ur sick? i hope u get better soon sweetness. =] its ok if u don't have a favourite sport. i am not a huge fan of sport actually. now n then its good fun to have a quick game of footy or basketball with your friends. good exercise too. then again, so is dancing all nite. how do you think i stay so slim and healthy? i get plenty of aerobic exercise, but not so much anaerobic exercise. maybe i should join a gym? i want to work on my strength. and if i gain a bit of muscle i won't look so skinny, which is a good thing. hmm, better looks, increased physical strength, and better general fitness. i'll give it some serious thought! YES. good idea! exercise = better looks = more sex = more exercise = even better looks = even more sex = even more exercise = HOTNESS! whoa, i'm smart. SEXercise! *sigh* i will never be as hot as brad pitt or tom cruise.
i wish i had the money for plastic surgery but unfortunately i can hardly afford a cup of water at McDonalds! and cups of water at McDonalds are free!! speaking of macca's, don't eat any of their food at all!! it's all deadly poison! even eating a single french fry from that dreaded restaurant of evil will turn you into a fat, bald 43 year old man. and you don't even want to know what the burgers do to you!!! i'll tell you one thing though. all McDonalds food makes you fat. do you see something here? CONSPIRACY THEORY TIME... all McDonalds (EVIL corporation) food makes you fat yes? now why would they want to make you fat? think about it! they are fattening us up to use us as a cheap source of burger meat!! they are going to KILL US ALL and make burgers out of our BRAINS and our STOMACHS!!!!! but with all the humans dead (killed by the EVIL corporations) who will buy their new and improved burgers? the answer? SPACE ALIENS!! yes, aliens from outer space will invade the planet earth, attracted by the low burger prices at the planet's most popular fast food chain. soon every country worldwide will be overrun with aliens! humans will be a rare sight, only found at human farms owned by the McDonalds company (EVIL corporation). And who will be running that company now the humans are all gone? The aliens? NO. The McDonalds company will not be run by aliens, nor will it be run by humans, nor will it be run by pink bunny rabbits. The McDonalds company will be run by 'Ronald McDonald', a member of that diabolical, wicked, and EVIL race known as 'Advertising Gimmicks'. Don't go away, 'cause the worst is yet to come! Ronald McDonald is the Antichrist!!! It’s true, it’s even in the Bible. Revelation 33:12:- ‘The antichrist shall come unto the earth disguised as the Chief Executive Officer of a well known fast food chain and his given name shall begin with R and his given name shall end with D and his surname shall begin with M and his surname shall end with D and he shall be a member of the most evil race ever to grace the Planet known as Earth.” Straight from the horse’s mouth folks - THE one and only BIBLE. Now, lets analyse that verse from the holy book of God. It says the given name of the Antichrist will start with R and end with D. ‘Ronald’ matches these criteria perfectly! it says the surname of the Antichrist will start with M and end with D. No surprises here, ‘McDonald’ matches up just fine. Lastly, it is extremely well known that ‘Advertising Gimmick’ is a far more evil race than Blacks, the French, and even ASIANS. It’s very possible that ‘Advertising Gimmick’ could be the most evil race on the planet. Just a few years ago, a famous ‘Advertising Gimmick’ by the name of Joe Camel was found to be promoting the poisoning of innocent children with toxic cancer-causing leaves wrapped in paper tubes. Here’s some advice: Never trust a Black person, never trust a Frenchman, NEVER trust an Asian, and NEVER EVER EVER EVER trust an ‘Advertising Gimmick’. Their very existence is based solely around MONEY. Money is the root of all evil, therefore the entire race is EVIL and should be EXTERMINATED. The future of the planet is sounding pretty grim, isn’t it? BUT if the entire human race bands together and BOYCOTTS the EVIL CORPORATION known as McDonalds, the company will go out of business. Yes, YOU PERSONALLY can help prevent the murdering of innocent people. YOU can help save the Earth from being invaded by aliens from outer space! And YOU can help prevent the coming of the Antichrist. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, DON’T BUY, EAT, DRINK, OR EVEN TOUCH A MCDONALDS PRODUCT. The future of the human race depends on YOU. Do you want to help even more? Use the World Wide Web to find out how to build a bomb! Build a few bombs and blow up McDonalds stores! WARNING: Blowing up McDonalds stores is illegal, dangerous, and may involve coming into close proximity with McDonalds products. Be careful! And please, don’t kill innocent customers. Set off the fire alarm before detonating the bomb so all the customers evacuate and avoid being blown to smithereens. YOU CAN HELP SAVE THE WORLD. BUT HURRY!!!! We only have five years to destroy the McDonalds corporation before their evil plan comes into action. ACT NOW before its too late! Tell all your friends and family to shun McDonald’s stores like the BLACK DEATH. Stay well away from the foul-smelling dens of toxic sludge yourself. And email this notice to all your friends! Pink bunny rabbits will thank you! Power Performance Penis Pills – Lengthen your penis by 170%!!! Save your sex life! Free sample pack of VIAGRA included!!! And if you’re interested in buying 100% GENUINE SOFTWARE, we can help you! Office 2003 Professional from only $5 including postage to anywhere in the United States! or Canada!! or Zimbabwe!!!! Anyway, back to my original point. EXERCISE is beneficial to your health! It promotes healthy circulation and respiratory function. Just what a crackhead like me needs to increase his LUNG CAPACITY so he can do BIGGER BURNS. Would you like to hear a little story? No? Too bad. A few years ago, I was overweight. About 150kg overweight. And I’m not exaggerating there. One day back in mid-2002, I woke up and realised I wasn’t taking advantage of life the way I could. That day I bought my first crack pipe and 8 ball of crystal meth. A week later, I’d lost 50kg. Two weeks later, I was 75kg lighter than I’d been before I decided to make changes in my life. I kept smoking meth and I kept losing weight, but I needed to improve my general fitness if I wanted to be successful in life. I joined a gym in November 2002 and I’ve been going three times a week ever since. Before I joined that gym, I could barely lift a 5kg sack of potatoes. Now I have no trouble at all lifting motorbikes, furniture, and light aircraft. I’ve also joined the local amateur ballet club where I can flaunt my physical strength and flexibility. I’m proud of myself, not all that long ago I was a loser with nothing to live for. Now I’m good looking, strong, energetic, whoa dude. I just love myself. These days my weight remains pretty much constant at 47kg. 46kg of that is muscle. I am so attractive, I have 7 girlfriends and they like to get naked together and fool around in my office while I’m working. It makes it pretty damn hard to concentrate!! Oh I completely forgot to mention, back before I started getting my life on track I was unemployed and unskilled. Now I’m a drug dealer and I make a few hundred thousand a day. I have no trouble funding my 6 ounce per day methamphetamine habit, I’m a member of exclusive clubs with exorbitant membership fees, and I live in a $50,000,000 mansion in the nicest area of Melbourne. I turned my life around with the help of drugs, drugs, drugs, exercise, and sheer willpower! Now you can do it too! Want to be successful like me? Don’t hesitate to give me a call! Pure crystal meth only $100 a gram! 1/5 the price of our competitors! Okay now where’s my dick? Did the meth make it shrink to the size of a pea? *sigh* Wait, no. It’s still 27 inches long. Ladies love me and my Rod of God. My Pole of Soul. What am I talking about!!!? I think I had a bit too much crystal meth today... but oh well. Where’s my dick so I can have another burn? Oh, there it is, inside my pants. Hardeeharharhar!! You know what’s really gay? Two men having sex, especially anal sex. Extremely gay. But anyway, that’s irrelevant. The point is, I need an ounce of cocaine but no one can hook me up. I feel like a line of coke right now, actually. Back in a second, just calling my dealer in Colombia! He’s sending over a 747-load of plants. I’m going to try and grow them in my back yard. I can bribe the police into staying well away from my property. I will be making enough money each DAY to feed a third world country for 500 YEARS. A few measly bribes ain’t gonna hurt. Sounds like the 747 just landed on the airstrip out the back. Soon I’ll be rolling in coca plants and rolling in cash. Slave! Get your black ass here and start planting these. But first make me a gram of coke for the day!! Useless nigga... *sigh* Damn... I need coke, that stupid nigga should have finished making it by now! GRRR! I paid $10 for that slave.. Finally my coke is done.. bring it over bitch. thankyou... for being a useless nigga. *SNIFF* ok thats a gram of coke gone, about 4000000 left though, heh heh heh. who said money doesn’t grow on trees? ----5 yrs later---- ok the plants r so big and im making a few million a day off em. thanks.... fukn yes cunttttt.... fuk u make me sik u know that? i dunno bro. all i want is 10 cents and a cigarette lighter. and a ciggy. and a charge. and a few burns... fucking lost junkie cunts... *sigh*... drugs are gay like asians and french people---
OK, I wrote this when I was spun on crystal meth. I don't know what happened... I started off writing an email to my friend but it quickly turned into some cracked out insane nonsense. I cannot believe the utter garbage my brain came up with here.
I'm a nice person when I'm straight... really.
edit: yeah the racism in here gets pretty nasty. probably against guidelines? i don't have a problem with any of the groups i insulted, this is a work of fiction.
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