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Don't know how

Dagny

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 20, 2000
Messages
3,326
This week I've cried.
I've loved, laughed, and lied.
I told myself that missing you would get easier.
Promised my heart that staying strong one more day would be enough.
Explained to my soul that it was still whole -
An illusion.
All of it.
Tomorrow I'm going home.
To a home I've never seen, never known.
There will have to be a home,
a job, a bed, pictures on the walls.
And I'll put your frames all over the place,
tell you goodnight the way I do now,
put my fingers on your face, let the tears fall as they may, live the pain,
staring at an image that will exist outside the one dimension only in memory.
I have never felt as broken as I did that day.
Driving down the road to say goodbye,
but I still haven't figured out how to do that yet.
One fucking phone call, a voice I love on the other line, but it wasn't you,
And he was telling me that it never would be again.
I learned what love was by looking in your eyes.
Knew what joy could be by hearing your laugh, feeling your arms around me as we sat and planned and wondered at our friendship.
You told me once that you would always be strong for me when I needed you.
And now I need you.
Because of you.
I can't do this baby boy.
I can't pretend it's okay, say profound things like it was worth it to have known you [it was].
There is no way for me to smile through pain,
laugh without you ever again.
How do I know it's going to be a better world without you to promise it to me?
I've written you about a hundred letters in my mind.
None of them got it quite right,
this has been the worst of all.
But I must face that there can be a million letters,
and I still can't wait, excited, for your response to my words.
I don't have a way to tell you how much I love you.
We always agreed that we didn't have to say it, seeing each others eyes was enough.
So I go to sleep each night, praying to a god that I don't believe in that I will dream of you.
Hoping that maybe then I can hold you while you laugh,
feel your body shake from the happiness in you.
Hear you tell me that you love me, unconditionally -
I always believed it when you said it. No one had ever given me that before, and me trusting it.
I still trust you.
I want you to know that.
I miss you so much that I fear death less today.
I love you so much that I value joy more today.
Tomorrow? I have no idea,
I told you - I don't know how to do this.
So tomorrow will have to take care of itself,
and I'll take care of myself,
But your hands, I'll always feel them on my face when you tell me I make you happy.
There was a night -
it feels like so long ago, but remember? -
we sat outside that dingy hotel room,
it was so warm, that breeze felt so good.
You two had just met,
I remember thinking you would adore each other's company.
But you looked at me, and you told me,
"This changes everything, and I'm not afraid."
And I knew, at that moment, and you saw the knowing in me,
that you had become a man,
the one you wanted to be,
and you were going to love her beyond words, beyond this world.
And you did that baby boy, and I am so proud of you.
Thank you for loving her the way you did,
for making her happy, hearing her dreams,
showing me time and again that hope does exist.
I don't know where she'll go from here,
without you,
but I promise you with all that I am that I will love her as best I can for the rest of my life.
She really is the most amazing woman, isn't she?
We're so lucky to have her in our lives.
So I'll do that, for you, for me, for love.
I don't know when I'll be seeing you again.
There were some questions even we didn't have the answers to.
But I know that I'll go to sleep tonight,
and I'll tell you I love you over and over again,
and if I'm fortunate enough to wake in the morning
I'll spend the day telling people the things that I know.
Things that you taught me.
Joy that you brought me.
And I'll write you again,
probably within the hour,
but this time just for you and me.
I don't know how else to do this.
 
Dagny I cant say what i want to say to this here. I just typed a huge reply to this and then deleted it again....despite the amount of myself that ive displayed here at times, some things just arent supposed to be revealed on a mesage board. so ill leave it at thank you once again you beautiful girl for all the feelings this raised in me...maybe one day ill get to tell you about them.
ant
You told me once that you would always be strong for me when I needed you.
And now I need you.
Because of you. *sigh*
 
Damn, Dagny. First post I read today, and it floors me.
The pain of loss can be unbearable--I wish I could share yours and make it easier to take.
:)
spinkle
 
My poem for Jesse
I lost my best friend in the whole wide world a little over a year ago...and well now this. Dags i know and feel your pain more than you could ever know. I miss them both...so much so much...and somedays i'm not sure how i am dealing with it. People say Time heals...i don't know how much i believe it. Time seems to make things harder. Having to make memories without the people you want to be making them with. You know where to find me like always. I am thinking of you today and everyday. All my love
ange
 
Even harder than dealing with the loss itself is having your thoughts return to the loss when you haven't been thinking about it for a while...when the absence of the person you miss so much becomes apparent again, and then you can't keep it from intruding and interrupting everything that goes through your head. :(
Then the pain gradually dulls until it disappears...for a little while, at least. :(
 
Tomorrow I'm going home.
To a home I've never seen, never known.
There will have to be a home,
a job, a bed, pictures on the walls.
And I'll put your frames all over the place,
tell you goodnight the way I do now,
put my fingers on your face, let the tears fall as they may, live the pain,
staring at an image that will exist outside the one dimension only in memory.
*sigh* i know this feeling we have talked about it. and know that you dont ahve to burden your knoble shoulders with such pain by your self. you ahve friends and i would hold up the world for you if i thought i could make you smile :)
You told me once that you would always be strong for me when I needed you.
And now I need you.
Because of you
i always thought i could be strong enough to take care of anything that i had power over everything because i could love and be loved. in the end i found that life is a mystery there are no certainties and the only person you need to gains approval is your self. lvoe yourself as i know you do. you make me smile on so many levels dags my dear heart. i lvoe you.
-phil-
"walking on sunshine"
 
It's incredible how deep life reaches when you are so connected in the heart, so many steps together frolicking through this incredible journey of our lives together, and the beauty of the time we share is made so meaningful and precious when it is no longer with us. Nothing beautiful lasts forever, no matter how much we love it, no matter how much we can't think of a reality where that person is not a part of anymore. So deep when you're connected to the heart so much that the beauty of remembering the person is also accompanied by the pain of knowing someone so special who is no longer around. So much is the connection of kindred minds that our faith and our love has us reach out to the unknown, and they, in a reality we are veiled from, they are reaching out to us as well. Hopefully the tears will be translated to tears of joy and laughter in the future where we will all be reunited, person with person, group to group, love to love, mother to child, father to son, and we'll have all of the days of sunlight to enjoy each other's prescence. It would take many lifetimes. I feel some intense vibrations of feeling that you all have for this person who has touched your lives. It moves me. May god bless us all.
I think i know how you're feeling Dags, but i'll never really know.
[ 05 August 2002: Message edited by: liquidocean ]
 
I dont know if its because the whole world has come crashing down on me lately, or if there was just something in this that spoke to me, heart to heart, but sitting here at my desk at work, i just missed my half hour for lunch, because i read this over, literally, half a dozen times, and i havent stopped crying since.
Today I had to write my internship paper, and of all the things i hated, loathed, about my internship, i ended up writing a very positive paper, and the ending was more poetry than a professional summary. I ended up talking about the values i learned, which stemmed mostly from hurt and disappointment that i got from having my work criticized. I guess i really learned a lot about people in general here. More than i thought i would. I guess life is just one big circle, we learn something somewhere, and end up applying it in so many different spots in our life. YOU.... you teach me something every single time you write, and just like these little life lessons here at my job, i take them to heart. i cherish them. i live them.
In the time i've known you, you've taught me about courage, about strength, about hope, and not giving up; about heartache, about bliss, about true love, friendship, contentment. I felt a bond to you that i never felt with anyone on this board.... i'll never forget that.
I read this and it immediately became my favorite piece that you've ever written (and yes, i know i've said that before). I was so moved by it, that i actually sent the link to a few people i though might benefit from your powerful words.
And yet me, I cant find one word to describe how it made me feel.
Its brilliant dags, and maybe i can never truly explain what i took from it, but where i sought to find strenght, i found it here instead. And beauty, and love.. and endurance.. and everything that passion stands for.
And i love you all the more for it.
 
I'm really speechless, and that is rare for me.
It's sad when you see someone of your talent, and brillance..so hurt. Your words are as strong as you are. Keep your head up. Even if your head is always hung high, remember which way the wind blows on your face, and take notice to the angel on your shoulder. Even the saddest things result in a better moment. It just might not be today.
So when tomorrow comes, believe in your smile.
 
Dags, we've never talked. Don't know if we ever will. But you are a brilliant person. Your writings inspire, comfort, and embrace me as I read them. He'll always be here. In our hearts, in our memories, and in our thoughts every day. And if you listen closely, you will still hear him whispering in your ear. The things he used to say, and the things you know he would say. He'll always be here with us.
{{{{Amy}}}}
 
All i can say is:
"Today's pain is tomorrow's Memory..."
If you give yourself enough time to heal, and then to grow in a new direction without this person that you love, you will be able to look back on these hard times and appreciate them as much as you do the good times.
With everygreat love, there comes a time of great sorrow. It's just that sometimes it comes soner than one expects...
 
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